Tuesday, 5 May 2020

FTL: Really Peaceful

[Part of the Adventures in Space journal]

"We should be safe now!" said Morty as the Who the F* Cares entered Engi space. "I heard this race was, like, really peaceful!"

An Engi craft appeared right on cue, explaining that a virus called "Rick Sanchez" was detected aboard and thus, they had to be destroyed. With a single press of a button Rick launched a full salvo and destroyed them. "D-don't believe everything you hear Morty! W-We're gonna need to make a pit stop."

Rick parked the ship next to a nearby Zoltan research vessel and through bribery and the repayment of some undisclosed favor got a treatment to slip through any future Engi detectors. This proves really handy at their next stop, an Engi shipyard where Rick spends a lot of time upgrading the ship and loading it out with augmentations while selling the unused parts.

"There's no p-point rushing if we don't get there alive, Morty."

While in port a Mantis ship, decorated by corpses of Rocks, appears and declares its intent to hunt Charlie. Rick goads the creatures and flushes them out the airlock (he made the button look like a toilet lever) without any fanfare. Just as they are about to depart Charlie arrives with another Rock person, some sort of noble, who he says requires passage to the Grand Basilisk, which is on a planet nearby.

Morty readily agrees to help while Rick mutters "Yeah sure, whatever," while drinking more booze and simultaneously blow torching more armor onto the hull.

Insight: A bunch of the FTL races feature in the game Into the Breach, which is made by the same company.

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