Echoes of Exile: The Prince's Pursuit

It's spruiking time as guildie Malkhia has released his fantasy novel Echoes of Exile: The Prince's Pursuit! If you're an avid reader please give it a try. Maybe you'll also enjoy Juris' The Golem City while you're at it. 

While we're doing all things guildie, I may as well up the link to Lyv's music youtube channel and the Dragonarm website where DL does monthly gaming posts or videos.

Solo RPGs

Other than playing chess I've been dabbling again in the uncommon realm of free, pen and paper solo RPG games. Usually these either make use of dice or playing cards for randomness but for this set, it's purely just dice.

Against all Evil

This make your own narrative sees your three stat characters face off against threats by rolling dice to reduce the threat's matching stats and accumulate doom tokens per threat stat higher than their own per turn. Upon reaching 5 doom they die or they can lift their doom once (per character) by creating more story about the threat, which I suppose is a neat way of fleshing out an enemy.

Interesting idea but mathematically poor. Having characters with a range of stats is bad, where as having everyone be carbon copies of each other (and ideally excelling in the same one stat) will let you steam roll most of the time. Not recommended.

The Wizard's Test RPG

This solo only game has you as a young apprentice exploring a mystical tower, but your character is so weak and the odds of making it through the first level are already super low, especially since by design you will be revisiting the same rooms over and over until you get a set of lucky rolls. Not fun.

The Creature of Murky Country RPG

A solo game where you are hunting down a creature around town but you soon realize as you randomly wander around that there is actually very little to do as most results only have a specific character class action tied to it (which is randomly determined for the character at the start). That's fine if you luck into the right spot but most of the time everything is uneventful. Not fun.

Tindalos RPG

This solo game is set in the Lovecraftian-verse where you are a hapless fool being hunted by a hound of Tindalos. There's a bigger variety of events here but the setup mechanic of assigning various dice to your stats is ridiculous as it basically comes down to hoping you land on activities you are good at (but can still roll and fail). Better than all the above but still not recommended.

Kalia's Cleansing

In this adult RPG you character must reach a magical spring to lift a curse. A simple two-page ruleset, only needing 1d6 and an interesting game design where you can actually make some decisions and not just rely on blind die rolls makes this the best of this set, though the theme itself might be an issue for many.

Voidstar: The Winner

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

Despite Amar's close quarters prowess, he could do nothing when the Gantulyst eidolon crushed him under foot, and Kela De Thaym could only damage the Profit-Taker Orb before being blown away by its artillery. Like Archon Boreal before her, the weakened Archon Nira was torn to shreds by the regenerating Void Angel, and Parvos' Protea was severely hurt in finally destroying Nef Anyo's Razorback with her summoned turrets.

This meant she was easy prey when the Void Angel finally came for her while the Gantulyst eidolon wrecked the Profit-Taker up but still ultimately lost to the giant spider due to the eidolon's weakened state. And so, the last two combatants finally faced off against each other: The Profit-Taker Orb versus the Void Angel!

Screeching as it unleashed its deadly attacks the Void Angel took the giant spiderbot to the edge of death before it unleashed hell upon the void nightmare. As it did before, the Angel retreated to the void to heal but since the Profit-Taker isn't some stupid eidolon, it continued to fire everything it had to disintegrate the angel's dormant body, forcing it to be trapped in its voidscape forever! [Um, I suppose that would work?]

"Dollie dollie, I a giant. Big and bad as Hunhow's heart.
Salty squishes are my diet. Death and murder are my art." -Profit Taker

Now free to search for the promise signal, the towering raknoid turned only to find that she was dwarfed by a giant, smiling face looking down upon her. "Hey, kiddo..."

That's brings Voidstar to a close, thanks for reading!

Voidstar: Semi-Finals

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

As fewer combatants remained standing, the call of the promise signal grew stronger in each of their minds. An explosion in the sky signaled the destruction of the Balor Fomorian as the Void Angel ripped it apart from the inside, and this was echoed by an explosion on the ground where Kela De Thaym put an end to the heavily damaged Exploiter Orb.

While the sword wielding Shadow Stalker got curb stomped by the Profit-Taker, Vor and his Janus key further damaged Nef Anyo's Razorback but could not defeat it as the war machine's autocannons ripped him in two. Elsewhere, Malice managed to snipe at the Gantulyst eidolon before being caught and destroyed by one of its energy pillars, Zuud was put down by Parvos' Protea, and Teshin put up a heroic but ultimately doomed battle against Archon Nira who turned him to stone [and then broke his neck :P].

The easiest Archon.

Her brother Amar faced off against the Rhino specter in an equally long battle, and after dealing considerable damage to each other the Rhino's Soma and Dual Raza are not enough as he falls prey to the highly aggressive wolf archon. [Also, Amar is basically a Rhino Prime with cheat codes enabled so... there's that.]

Voidstar: Nihil vs Teshin

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

The Lich Worm Queen barely avoided the collapsing Teralyst, forcing her out into the open and right into the sights of the Balor Fomorian which promptly vaporized her. Derim Zahn also had no chance as he was eaten by Archon Nira, and the injured Archon Boreal could not match the regenerating Void Angel while Ballas [without the Lotus powers] couldn't keep up with Parvos' Protea.

Zuud's Tombfinger proved effective against the predictable Sprag who moves in straight lines, and while Lephantis slew Captain Vor, his Janus Key revived him as Corrupted Vor to ultimately destroy the infested ettin with his new Janus energy beams. The injured flying sentient, Ropalolyst was also killed when it fought against Nef Anyo's Razorback, only damaging the missile launching war machine.

"I find chaos... unsettling." - Nihil

They need to make more boss fights like this one!

Neither Nihil nor Teshin gave it a glance as it fell in the landscape beyond them, with both swordsmen keenly focused on their own duel. "Finally, a worthy foe," Tenshin remarked as he nimbly dodged away from Nihil's giant Vitrica. "Your persistence is disruptive to my efforts to order," the orokin giant replied as he fired shards of glass from his forehead gem down at the Dax warrior - but Teshin was too agile for him, and in a display of true mastery used his nikana to reflect one of the glass pieces right back into Nihil's neck. Eyes widened by surprise, Nihil dropped his sword and fell to his knees as blood poured from the wound. Using this opening, Teshin threw his Orvious disc and made it explode right in Nihil's face, ending the Glassmaker once and for all.

Voidstar: The Queen of Rathuum

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

With the number of combatants halved again, Mania jumped the Rhino with his twin Lacera but was easily laid low since he's almost exactly like a Loki. The last remaining acolyte, Malice, was more successful in sniping the wounded Ember with its Opticor while the acolyte leader, Shadow Stalker, carved up Amaryn and her ancients with his War great sword.

Executioner Dhurnam's close range weaponry [and previous injuries] also spelled his doom against Archon Amar, while the Profit-Taker destroyed the Bonewidow after taking some damage. The badly damaged Exploiter Orb was also still standing after torching a limping Zanuka. From the ridge, Kela de Thaym observed the Gantulyst eidolon annihilate the Nova specter who was only armed with kunai and ether daggers before she heard a tell tale "RRRREEEEEEEEEEE!" scream from beside her - the Teralyst eidolon had spotted her! [total role reversal because in game it is YOU that has to find the bloody hide and seek eidolons]

She looks like this guy from the Fifth Element.

Quickly jumping out of the way, the Queen of Rathuum deployed multitudes of rollers to distract the simple minded creature. It was too dangerous to get close to use her shotguns so again she employed her orbital strikes to destroy the last remaining weak spots on her opponent and finally destroying the eidolon!

Voidstar: Angel vs Eidolon

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

Nihil watched the battles with great interest until a loud voice called out to him. "Ai yo! You call that a sword? You should see Hok's masterpiece!" yelled the self-referencing Ostron as he drew out his favourite Zaw. With a sigh, Nihil swatted him away with a gentle swipe of his Vitrica. Unfortunately there were equally mismatched encounters here as Mutalist Alad V could do little to Nef Anyo's Razorback, nor could the Wolf of Saturn Six throw his hammer hard enough to prevent himself being obliterated by the Balor fomorian.

Similarly Clem could only lightly injure Archon Boreal and M-W.A.M. did the same with Archon Nira before being crushed. Meanwhile inside the wreckage of a Grineer galleon Derim Zahn made good use of his turrets and relocator beacons to defeat the J3-Golem, and Teshin was wounded when dismantling Frohd Bek's Ambulas. On a lower floor, Sister Vala Glarios came face to face against the Lich Worm Queen. With both combatants equally injured and equally driven it came down to their weapons to decide this outcome, and since Liches have the superior guns this was the end of Vala's continuity. [I'm basing that off internet reviews and not experience, because the internet is always right - right?]

As an aside: the Zariman is currently my favourite map.

Despite being far from the surface, the Lich Worm Queen heard the shrill shriek of the Void Angel on the surface as it engaged the Hydrolyst eidolon with flight slams, powerful energy orbs and void spikes seriously damaging the giant creature and breaking many of its sydonias as it fought back with its own seeking projectiles, ground stomps, acid rain and giant gun that eventually damaged the angel enough to retreat into the void to recover. As eidolons are simple creatures, the Hydrolyst proceeded to ignore it which turned out to be a fatal flaw once the fully recovered void angel returned to finish it off.

Voidstar: Warframes Executioners

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

The shots distracted Kahl enough to be startled when a robotic voice behind him boomed "You shall NOT be spared the rod... as those who came before you... Were. NOT. Spared.". Kahl brought everything he had and everything he could find against the Exploiter Orb, damaging it, but the soldier was simply too slow to dodge the giant spider robot's mortars. Nearby, the Profit-Taker had no issues against the already damaged Jackal, nor did the Ropalolyst against the limping Hyena Th. A heavily injured Shik Tal was easy prey for Amaryn's ancients, and Sprag finished off the badly damaged Mag with her Manticore hammer.

Numerous executioners also fell at this point, as Gorth couldn't keep distance from the Shadow Stalker, Harkonar's tricks didn't fool Ballas, Zura's ignis didn't save her against the Bonewidow,  and Nok could only wound his old captain (Vor) with his Sobek before being Seer-ed (Vor's pistol) in the forehead. The Excalibur Umbra launched a sneak attack on Lephantis, managing to destroy one of its three heads [the melee one] but was subsequently worn down by the ranged capabilities of the other two due to only bringing his Skiajati blade.

Across the field, Zuud encountered the Frost specter and thanks to her Tombfinger kitgun [which I assume she uses like an on-call crew member] could out range the warframe's Tigris shotgun while destroying it, ice shield and all. The Volt and Parvos' Protea also faced off against each other, and while the Volt was faster - dashing through the Protea's grenades and blaze artillery to cut her down - her temporal anchor rewound time for her, reviving her and reapplying the damage done to her opponent which was enough to claim victory!

"Protea... my beautiful Protea... she will preserve!" -Parvos Granum

Voidstar: Dhurnam vs Little Duck

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

With half the combatants now dead, the promise signal intensified - drawing a few more smart or lucky individuals from their hiding spots in the wreckage! [I had to add 7 wild cards because of all the draws those demolishers caused. Sigh!]

The Arbiters attempted to ambush Kela de Thaym but were out gunned by her Twin Kohmaks, Erra managed to ambush the Teralyst eidolon to further injure it with his sentient beam before getting obliterated with a similar result for the Auditor Denial Bursa against the Gantulyst eidolon. The Rhino specter gunned down Raptor RV with his Soma, Roky couldn't out K-Drive Mania as the acolyte switched teleported with his board and hacked the ventkid into tiny pieces with his Lacera, Dru Pesfor was unmade by Nova's antimatter drop, and Vay Molta could only damage Zanuka with her rockets before being blasted out of the sky.

In closer matches the already injured Zealoid Prelate could only wound Amar before the wolf Archon tore him to pieces, the Ember specter was badly hurt while chain fire balling Rana Del, and Malice out gunned the Infested Mesa. This is because Malice cheats with magnetize so her opticor will hit even when the target is in cover! [I hate it when she does that to me!]

A Lanka sniper shot from the ridge line struck Executioner Dhurnam in the back, but it was only enough to stagger him. Little Duck kept on firing, landing hit after hit but Dhurnam's armor was just too thick [also good reduction against Lanka damage type] - and worse - the more he was hit the faster he moved! Before she knew it, Dhurnam had knocked her down - twin Hek's gleaming in the star light. "You bloody mucker," she started, before being abruptly silenced as his first four barrels destroyed her metal head, and the second four barrels destroyed her chest which housed her actual head.

Octuple headshot!

Voidstar: Clem vs John Prodman

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

Elsewhere on the crashed ship, Clem spotted a Corpus enemy down the hallway and opened fire with his Twin Grakatas while yelling his usual battle cry: "Clem!". John Prodman barely had time to draw his Prova shock stick to block all the bullets before teleporting right beside his opponent and zapping the little Grineer, sending Clem flying into the wall. Somehow, this move that usually defeats everything, was not enough as Clem rolled back under John's next swing both guns ablazing. "Grakata!" Clem yelled as he emptied both clips into Prodman, knocking the Prova out of his hands.

"Clem?" asked Clem as both guns continued to click on empty, John Prodman still staring down at him. After a few tense and still moments, John finally shrugged and left in a pillar of light - leaving behind a signed poster of himself for this most worthy foe.

I still need to get me one of these...

Outside, the battles raged on with the Lich Worm Queen tanking the charger demolisher explosion, the Hyena Ng barely scratching the Hydrolyst eidolon before getting crushed under foot, the Saryn specter being impaled by the Void Angel, Archon Boreal easily defeating the mimic Jen Dro, Archon Nira taking only light damage while destroying Hyena Pb, Derim Zahn taking down the thief Maroo with his Sonicor, Teshin cutting through the Equinox specter's Shaku nunchakus, Frohd Bek's Ambulas taking damage while defeating Azoth, Cressa Tal losing to the multi-skilled M.W.A.M. unit, the J3 Golem melting the Arn Etina/Darvo Moa and the Nox demolisher exploding the Voidrig in a suicide run.

Out in orbit, the Jordas Golem made its approach but suddenly found itself encased in glass. Somehow it could hear an Orokin's voice in it's head saying but a single word: "Break." With a backhand swing Nihil the Glassmaker obliterated the floating infested mass with his Vitrica blade. [I'm using the version of Nihil that you fight against in his prison, so he's probably taller than he should be. :P]

Voidstar: Sargas Ruk vs Alad V

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

On the other side of the ridge Robotics Tech Jad Teran's nullifying helmets didn't save him against Sprag's hammer, nor did Ved Xol's opticor save him from the Wolf of Saturn Six. Baro Ki'teer had no chance against Nef Anyo's Razorback, Latrox Une's shield ospreys were not enough against the Balor Fomorian's death ray, the Mag specter barely won against the Gyre hyena [mostly because she's armed with a spear and shurikens], Angst was taken out by a self detonating ghoul called the expired, the Ropalolyst was only injured by the boiler demolisher's explosion, Executioner Nok shot down the Raptor MT and Executioner Reth managed to lightly injure Lephantis with his Drakgoon before being eaten by it.

Thanks to its electricity firing plasma rifles the Hyena Th barely defeated close range combatant Executioner Garesh, and the Frost specter was lucky in shotgunning the Ignis bearing Garv before his snowglobe melted. With good use of teleporting to a distance and his temporary shielding, Captain Vor defeated Armis Ulta while Lech Kril could only injure Sister Vala Glarios before she worked out to hit his tubes to kill him.

In one of the crashed Corpus capital ships General Sargas Ruk located Alad V cowering in a corner. "P-P-Please just wai..." is all Alad manages before the general incinerates him with napalm. "Regret will be your legacy!" Suddenly from the flames burst forth a round metal choker that locked itself around the general's neck forcing him to cease the attack... in fact, he found he could no longer move at all. Before him, Mutalist Alad V stood up grinning. "You Grineer are too arrogant, general. I will teach you to play nice," mocked Alad as he sauntered towards his prey. "Don't you see? It will be better if... when... we are one. Now open yourself up to me."

Alad V is really into bondage too.

Sargas Ruk could only scream in his mind as his body obeyed, revealing all his weak spots like a good slave. He would not survive what Mutalist Alad V had in store for him.

Voidstar: Kahl Fight Good

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

Explosions continued across the battlefield as more demolishers did their suicidal work. The Jackal survived its encounter with the bursa demolisher with heavy damage as did Grustag-3 member Shik Tal who barely scraped by against the machinist demolisher thanks to his rockets and giant shield. His brother Leekter was exploded by the hyena demolisher - a fate shared by the Valkyr specter whose talons took her too close and her paralysis skill too ineffective against the satyr demolyst. The Stalker was also obliterated when trying to melee the anti-MOA demolisher, but afterwards he just reconstituted himself to become the Shadow Stalker!

Elsewhere the sniper Ven'kra Tel was torn apart by Amaryn and her ancients, the Bonewidow defeated Misery who was self limited with only his scythe, Raptor RX had no chance against the Profit-Taker, Executioner Zura burned the Paris wielding Trinity specter to death with his Ignis, Executioner Gorth's Ogris rocketed the students of Cephalon Suda, the Sergeant [how did this guy even survive the landing] was easily handled by Parvos' time altering Protea, Zenith Galactical Tia Mayn was sniped by Executioner Harkonar, and the duel between specters Excalibur with dual skanas versus the Volt with a heat sword ended with victory for the latter.

Up on the ridge Kahl-175 faced off against Tyl Regor. "Would you look at you?" Tyl asked. "So fascinating. Tell me, why would you fight someone of your blood? Someone that loves you?" Kahl grunted, "You not like Kahl. Only Kahl like Kahl." Regor just laughed. "Foolish tube man, I AM YOUR FATHER!".  "Kahl has no father!" Kahl growled as he opened fire with his Grakata, but couldn't land a hit against the fast teleporting, hammer wielding scientist who thwacked him right in the chest plate. Kahl quickly rolled aside to evade Regor's follow up flying fist and in a smooth motion hacked through him with his Slaytra machete before sheathing it again.

"Kahl protect brothers."

"I'm not... done with you," the injured Regor coughed, suddenly unable to stand. "You done," Kahl answered. "Bleed to death. Kahl no need waste time on you." Grimacing, Tyl finally collapsed dead as Kahl walked away.

Voidstar: Acolytes Down

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

The thrasher demolisher screamed as it self detonated, but only barely damaged the well defended Auditor denial bursa. A poor result when compared to the self detonations of the demolyst Heqet who nuked the Icemire Hyena, the kuva guardian demolisher who tanked Nako Xol's Tetra to get into lethal range and even the Bailiff demolisher who managed to destroy a synovia of the Teralyst eidolon. Violence also became the first acolyte to perish when he went up against the Exploiter Orb as his melee only weaponry made it hard to hit the giant spider's weakspots while simultaneously putting him in range of its heavy flamethrower.

"Value the punishment I provide."

While the Cinderthesh Hyena couldn't keep up with Vay Molta's hellion jetpack and missiles, Zanuka hunter claimed victory against executioner Dok Thul whose healing powers couldn't keep up with the robots damage output. Nearby, Investor Relations Department Dru Pesfor fought the large drone 002-ER. The flying combat platform was fitted with powerful beam shotguns, but getting close to use them against its opponent in cover proved its undoing as Dru's glaxion slowed the drone's firing and already slow flying to halt. Also forced into slow motion was Ergo Glast and his MOA squad when hit by the molecular prime of a Nova specter. Their slowed lasers couldn't get through her null star shield as she disassembled them with her ether daggers.

The gunfire nearby was from Torment's Akvasto pistols as he tried to get a bead on the spry and loud mouthed Kela De Thaym, Queen of Rathuum, who couldn't get close enough to make use of her Twin Kohmak repeater shotguns. She didn't need to however, as her orbital strikes caught the acolyte by surprise and obliterated him.

Voidstar: Helpless Hyenas

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

In the chaos of battle Phorid was sliced in half by Mania's lacera. The acolyte took note that even the specters of the rail junctions had made their way here with a Rhino unloading its Soma assault rifle into a Loki, only to find the Loki was a decoy as the real Loki flanked him with its Burston rifle. The bullets bounced off the Rhino's iron skin though, and with a roar the Rhino quickly charged with dual Raza scythes in hand. Switch teleporting with his opponent didn't save the Loki from being eviscerated. [He should have used invis more! :P]

Rhino: The toughest early frame there is.

Another specter, this one an Ember, dodged the mortars of the Raptor NS who was promptly dispatched by a comet the Ember summoned above it. Nearby, the Raptor RV dealt with Hyena Ln2 by simply staying airborne and laser barraging the foolishly designed "Liquid Nitrogen" dog-bot. The larger Lynx model engaged against Rana Del who used her Investor Relations training to systematically destroy the Lynx's shield drones and the Lynx itself with her Glaxion ice beam.

Continuing the poor performance of the hyena pack is Lockjaw & Sol who couldn't evade Malice's Opticor due to the magnetic field the acolyte placed on them, and the Rabbleback who was unfortunate enough to come face to face with infested Mesa's peacemakers. It had no chance, just like the infested juggernaut that thought to take on the Gantulyst eidolon. It simply got kicked away, and even after transforming into the greater juggernaut behemoth it could only damage one of the giant's synovias with its tar-quills while hiding in its toxic fog before being crushed under foot.

Voidstar: An Explosive Landing

[Part of the Voidstar: Warframe-128 story]

Battles raged across the debris striken planet surface, even as more ships crashed from the heavens. Palladino was surprised that so many had survived but was determined to follow the vision she saw. Separated from her allies she readied her Rakta Ballistica just as a large shadow moved behind her and with a graceful spin she let loose a burst of four bolts that wedged themselves in the heavy armor of Grineer executioner Dhurnam. Completely unphased and with the eight barrels of his twin shotguns already pointed at Palladino he pulled both the triggers, executing the Red Veil priestess with ease.

In the distance he spotted, Vem Tabook, a Grustag-3 ally who used similar weaponry but did not have the same luck when facing off against Archon Amar who promptly ripped off the soldier's face. At that moment Councillor Vay Hek flew over the battle field in his extensively modified body suit while laughing manically, calling everyone maggots, and firing at everything with his auto cannons yet somehow missing the many targets on the field. Upon landing he was promptly caught by surprise as a canister of condensed thermia exploded right on his chest plate, melting the metal and causing the Councillor to scream, curse and wail even more. A single Lanka sniper shot from close range through his head finally silenced him, as Little Duck darted to the next cover she could find. "That'll shut his mouth," she muttered to herself.

Little Duck usually takes the field against Profit-Taker.

Vay Hek's ghouls were here too, as discovered by Pelna Cade when he came face to face with the devourer demolisher that charged him with his wrist mounted hooks. Pelna's reflexes let him dodge the charge and drop a "slow" orb to impede his foe, but it didn't matter when the devourer launched one of his meathooks and caught the leg of Corpus Loan Reclamation agent, quickly winching him in like a fish out of water. In a panic Pelna managed to get one shot off with his Detron hitting the devourer square in his explosive vest - triggering the charge and obliterating both combatants. In similar fashion the heavy gunner demolisher self detonated as the Zealoid Prelate leaped through her Gorgon bullets and into melee range. While the blast destroyed her, the Zealoid Prelate was only injured and quickly looked around for more prey. [Why are there demolishers? I needed to fill out the roster!]

Voidstar: Warframe-128

"To all of you racing to that signal of promise... that siren song echoing in the black, remember that the promise of power, wealth and glory are just as strong as the promise of freedom. Somethin's out there, Dreamers. Somethin' nasty. Nora can feel it. Watch your back." -Nora Night

Since I haven't written for awhile I thought I'd get some practice in with this, which doubles as a 128 bracket tournament for most of the "named" characters in Warframe (simply using the =Rand() operator in excel to organize brackets). While I will lightly check on stats and such for this exercise I'm also removing some invulnerabilities to make the matches slightly more fair. Despite that, prepare to disagree with most of this fictional narrative! :P 

Chapters:
An Explosive Landing
Helpless Hyenas
Acolytes Down
Kahl Fight Good
Sargas Ruk vs Alad V
Clem vs John Prodman
Dhurnam vs Little Duck
Warframes Executioners
Angel vs Eidolon
The Queen of Rathuum
Nihil vs Teshin
Semi-Finals
The Winner

This tournament and story has concluded, thank you for reading!

TYOV: Plague Bearer

[Excerpts from Thousand Year Old Vampire]

Something is wrong with this blood. Is this another trick by the people after me? No, its not them. It's me, and I soon learn I’m the one spreading the disease. I don’t even have to touch the humans, just walking through a crowd soon makes them gag, cough up blood, and get violently ill. This is a perfect time to visit the Iscariot Divisions local headquarters.

Yep, I'm a Hellsing fan.

With my pursuers dealt with I can take the time to enjoy feasting on some villagers during a storm. One of them catches onto me and organizes a posse to chase me down, forcing me to hide in the mud at the bottom of a river. During their victory celebration I sneak back in and steal this hero's sword and his wife.

It is only later that I realize the entire episode with the village was just my imagination. While the village itself was real, none of the inhabitants survived my disease. Nor my hunger.

Finally realizing that I can only truly be free of the rot if I return to being mortal, I spend the next few years searching for a cure and find one offered by a wandering gypsy, suspiciously immune to my illness, in the form of a magic potion. Will this actually work or will it instead destroy me entirely? There is only one way to find out. I uncork the bottle and drink.

And that's the end of Gabriel Sol's story.

TYOV: Sylvie Cote

[Excerpts from Thousand Year Old Vampire]

With the fur trade booming, it is easy to shadow and prey on foolish hunters that either wronged me or have the misfortune of being vulnerable when I’m hungry. In doing so I inadvertently made young Sylvie Cote an orphan and decide to raise her myself, teaching her defenses against creatures like me. When she comes of age, I give her an old Aztec axe for her own protection – even if she one day must use it on me.

After so many years I am surprised when an elderly Cantor Infierni arrives in town on some church business. With all my hate resurfacing, I can’t help but drown the old man in the river. When the murder investigators begin asking questions, Sylvie works it out and after a brief battle forces me to admit my guilt. I am arrested and sentenced to hang, but before I can see if that actually can kill me a simple bribe is enough to get me out of gaol.

Feeding on woodland animals is barely enough to satiate me anymore and in my weakened state I am set upon by a cloaked hunter who must have had a terrible teacher. The thirst gets the better of me as I fly into a deathy frenzy and when I come too, I find the hunter to be a familiar woman that lies bleeding out in my arms. For some reason I feel that she is precious to me but I cannot remember why. Unable to let her die, I turn her into a vampire.

When I saved Mariana from the thugs I didn’t know she was Cantor Infierni’s grand niece, nor did I realize she was a member of the Iscariot Division. She knew what I was. Who I was. I decided to flee once more – this time across the sea to England.

Despite giving them the slip numerous times, the Iscariot Division led by Mariana Inferni was onto me. She taunts me by saying they destroyed my “daughter” Sylvie. I don't know who that is.

TYOV: Gabriel Sol

[Excerpts from Thousand Year Old Vampire]

We were hunting for the creature that destroyed the village, but it found my squad first. I managed to only wound it before it used its incredible speed to crush my chest with a simple punch. As I crumbled before it, I remember looking up at its terrible visage as blood from its wound dripped onto my face.

After learning about the incident from Cortes, Catalina sailed across the sea to try save my soul. She didn’t accept what I had become, kept wishing for her old husband back, kept calling me a monster. It was too much, so just for her I became the monster she saw me as.

No way I'm getting anything historically accurate. :P

Now I set forth alone to track down the beast again, abandoning Cortes and the rest of the conquistadors in hopes that succeeding in this quest would absolve me of my trespasses in the eyes of God. The duel was more  more even this time until the beast broke my blade and fled the battle, leaving me equally broken. The only thing I gained in this fight is that I now can more easily blend into the shadows. A new gift from my sire.

I use it to defeat Ohtli, an Aztec warrior who was as equally cursed as I - taking his axe and eating his heart in victory. As my humanity continues to fade the church sends Cantor Infierni of the Iscariot Division to investigate. It is too dangerous to stay so I slip away far to the North and join a New French colony called Canada (now known as Quebec).

Thousand Year Old Vampire

Prepare to forget.

Now here is a very different take of a single player game (though there are options to multiplayer it) where your main activity will be... writing! The book (or handy PDF file currently free on itch.io) also recommends writing on a word processor / laptop / computer over a diary for good reason. There will be a lot of strike-throughs and erasing. Ideally you also need a D6 and a D10 but you can just google "roll a D6 and D10" if you don't have the physical dice.

As the title suggests, you create a vampire and then simply follow prompts through the book to write about what happens to you. These are stored in almost single line sentences called "experiences" and you can put three similar experiences together to form a memory. Which you can only have FIVE of. Once you need more, its time to begin forgetting... which is great. And crazy. I love that the entire tone is set by the player. It can be as hilarious or dark as you want.  

Another excellent quirk is that prompts tell you to gain or lose skills, resources, and characters which you define yourself. Gain a skill and a resource might mean the vampire is now "incredibly handsome after falling on his face (skill) and has an umbrella (resource)". Create a character means just that. You then can write these things into your experiences - but beware, almost everything and everyone is lost in the passage of time.

Prompts can and will just as easily say lose a skill. Lose a resource. Kill a character. If you run out of skills or resources, you basically die / game over too. Definitely a strange one, but if you like creative writing you should definitely give this a try.

I'm putting up some excerpts from my vampires to give you an idea of what it might look like (though I think I'm actually too wordy):

Excerpt 1 - Gabriel Sol
Excerpt 2 - Sylvie Cote
Excerpt 3 - Plague Bearer