Age of Mythology: Retold

As many would know, strategy games aren't really my forte but this one has somehow made it into our Friday night game sessions and has probably become my most played strategy one for awhile. Obviously the co-op component helps a lot, though you can only co-op two players if going through the campaign story. That's ok though as there are many other modes that you can play through which is good, given my graphics card bombs out on some of the maps too.

A standard game round has you selecting your civilization (Norse, Greek, Egyptian, Atlantean, etc) followed by a major deity in that civilization - so for a Norse player you'd be choosing between Loki, Odin or Thor for example, each giving you slightly different "god" powers and "tech" trees in the form of minor gods who you get to pick as you advance from age to age.

Usually you get a town center, some peasants and some form of scout of your civilization type and from there have to collect food, wood, gold and favor to expand up through the ages. Favor is your battery for magical powers or making magical creatures and you how you gain it depends on your civilization. Atlanteans gain it by having their oracles stand as far apart from each other as possible. Greeks gain it by having as many people worshiping at the temple. Norse get it by killing enemies, and so forth.

AI wise, the fun bit is getting the mix n match of their personality types. A few examples are the defender who only defends, an attacker will constantly harass you, a humanoid will ignore all magic-related things and just fight you with men and machines, and an overwhelmer will just mass a big ball of troops and then throw it at you if you wait too long. You can also up the "difficulty" by letting the AI cheat basically if you really want a challenge (your peasant hits a tree once and gains 1 wood, their peasant hits a tree once and gains 1-3x wood).

It's simple enough to learn and fun enough to keep playing. Coming from me, a non strategy game player whose PC can't even run 1/4th of it properly, that's saying something so it must be doing something right! :)

Batman: The Telltale Series

Having played a few other Telltale games I can confidently say this one is the best. Excellent art, voice acting and branching plots that really give player agency make this a beautiful game, especially since the writers weren't afraid to have a different take on this Batman universe. 

Over two "seasons" with five chapters each (get the "Shadows" edition to get them both) you'll encounter many familiar faces from the rogues gallery and while there's a bit of QTE combat to be had (which is on the easy side of things) it's the timed dialogue choices that will really get your brain working. Excellent game and highly recommended! I only wish there was more of it! 

Your Friends and Neighbors

In this comedy drama series, Jon Hamm stars as Coop - a hedge fund manager with a lot of money but many relationships that put a strain on him. Upon losing his job he decides that he needs to keep up appearances with the titular friends and neighbors, who are also pretty well off themselves, and he does so by continuing to donate exorbitant amounts of money to charity, attending parties which mostly consist of people he doesn't like, keeping up his membership at the exclusive golf club etc.

He does this by robbing them, one expensive item at a time. This is great as plot wise he's hoping its something they won't miss as to not get caught, but also for us viewers they put in a "product ad" for said items which is really  cool and also just highlights how crazy some people are to own them. It's a fun show with a surprisingly high amount of sex scenes, but also a number of filler bits that are just used to pad out the story. Still worth trying out though, especially if you're a Jon Hamm fan. 

Robobeat

This rogue like rhythm FPS is somewhat the epitome of annoyance. Never mind the story or graphics, the game play loop itself if so tedious. Shoot on the beat (or your shots do less damage) must be one of the most ridiculous systems ever. It's not like guitar hero where the music is the point. Here you need to shoot things to clear zones and advance and requiring to slow everything down to tempo to do so just really takes the enjoyment out of it. Not recommended.

Ukraine: Enemy in the Woods

This is a documentary about a small piece of the war filmed mainly from body cams - following a company of 99 Ukranian soldiers holding a railway forest against the Russian advance. It shows the daily lives of the troop: the down time, the scavenging, the danger, and yes - some of the fighting too. You will see a few dead people (most are blurred/censored/out of shot if too close) so that might be your time to "nope" out, but otherwise it is a sobering 1 hour flick that just makes me really glad I'm not there as I wouldn't last five minutes in those conditions - and that's without an opposing force! Definitely worth watching if you can find it and is possibly one of the best anti-war films around.

As of this post it is day 1585 of Russia's two day special operation.  The front seems to be a stalemate currently, but drone warfare has improved to the point where Ukraine is now hitting targets in Moscow.

Hazbin Hotel Live on Broadway and Songs of Conquest

Entertainment with a focus on music!

Hazbin Hotel Live on Broadway

Celebrating the release of Season 2 of Hazbin Hotel, this live performance on Broadway by the voice actor/singers is absolutely brilliant - my only complaint is that it is too short! Even my wife, who doesn't watch the series, enjoyed it. Highly, highly recommended (but just like the show its not for kids), and I hope they do more of these live shows as there are many more songs they could do in the series (and that's not even going into Helluva Boss songs). I suppose they could do Hellaverse Live on Broadway? :D Here's a little sample for you all to enjoy. Five out of five!

Songs of Conquest

This pixely turn based strategy game plays a lot like the old King's Bounty game, where you have a leader or leader(s) marching around the map to capture resources and towns (where you can spend resources in building structures to recruit more folk for your army) while fighting enemies (usually static ones) via armies in hex grid maps. After you've exhausted your move, then your opponents leader(s) take their turn to wander around. I'm very thankful for the auto combat button in this one to make lopsided fights just finish in a single button press.

While that's all well and good the main draw for me was the nice story and the songs which play at the end of each mission. Very cool. I was sad when the extra "story" missions didn't have this. :P

Warhammer 40k: Speed Freekz

In this really crazy racing game, you play as the Orkz who I suppose are just super bored and want to race and fight? While I'm unaccustomed to Ork (which is basically bad English) which makes the customization difficult to understand, I'm pretty sure its one of those, unlock more vehicles and decorations the more experience you have and there are two game modes on offer, both being team vs team with the option for multiplayer.

In the first one, you're trying to get points by racing but don't let that stop you from shooting the enemy team! First you race to a main marker, then you start a mini-race to hit checkpoint around the main marker and then repeat four more times and the team with the highest score wins.

In the second mode, each team has a slow moving giant robot (that also shoots at you) "racing" slowly to a finish line. The idea is that racers pick up randomly spawning bombs (or stealing said bombs from destroyed enemy) and then driving it into the opposing robot to "slow it down". The team of the first giant robot to cross the finish line wins. 

Both modes are chaotic and... ok. And death is a mere slap on the wrist as you respawn in under five seconds but there's not much else happening with this one. Maybe its fine as a once off party game but otherwise, not recommended.

The Mandalorian and Grogu and Chainsaw Man: Reze Arc

Movies for fans of the series. 

Mandalorian and Grogu

This movie continues the story from The Mandalorian, and has everyone's favorite bounty hunter "dad" continue to teach, protect and nurture his charge Grogu, while doing some kick ass bounty hunting stuff. While the story is just ok, on par with the series, the action is definitely amped up with more fighting sequences. The two title characters also take turns taking the lead which is pretty cool but makes for a long run time. Not that I'm complaining! If you liked the series, you'll definitely enjoy this.

Chainsaw Man: Reze Arc

This movie continuation of the animated series follows our protagonist Denji thinking with his wrong head again, spending at least the first half of the movie trying to get lucky with a girl (which tracks). While the art is always top notch, the animation really kicks in at the second half which holds all the destructive fighting. Slow start but it turned out to be ok. Worth a watch if you've enjoyed the series. If you haven't seen the series, try that first and see if its for you (you'll know in a the first episode). 

Wuthering Waves

This is another gacha game which features better action combat than most and climbing / gliding system like Tower of Fantasy, which is fantastic. It also has a decent story and a ton of upgradable systems which is both good and OMG grindy. 

It also features thirsty gardeners...

You see, you have the usual gacha luck-of-the-draw party who can all level up and you can also level their weapons (both need special material grinded to break level caps). And then each can equip "captured" enemies. FIVE of them. That can also be leveled. But no its not just, "I want a lizard thing instead of this slug thing" because they also have randomized stats and abilities. This lizard might breath fire. This other lizard just naps and heals you. Want to tell the difference? 

Too bad you can't. You need to go kill the lizards until you capture one that does what you want. AND has the substat bonuses that interest you FOR THAT CHARACTER. Good thing you can only have three characters per squad... :P Also, I REALLY DESPISE they systems where everything levels up with you. Great you reached level 10? Well those level 1 monsters are now also level 10. It's like, what was the point of leveling up? But guess what, you can't AVOID leveling up, because its your exploration level that determines the monster level.

Yup! So even if you remained at level one but explored the hell out of the map, guess what? You're just leveling up the enemies. Pity, because there's some really nice story in there. If you feel like you don't mind that level of grind then I recommend this for you. Definitely not one for me though.

Spider-Noir, Harley Quinn and Kite Man

A trio of alternate superhero shows!

Spider-Noir

This currently single season story has Nicolas Cage star as a 1930's private detective who also moonlights as "The Spider", their version of Spiderman - and guess what? When you have a good story, good characters and good acting you get a good result! Without a doubt this is now our favorite version of Spiderman. On Prime you even have the option to watch in in black and white if you want. Highly recommended and hope they make a season two!

Harley Quinn (and Kite Man, Hell Yeah!)

This currently five season animated comedy features the titular Harley Quinn who starts off breaking up with Joker and then forming her own gang. A lot of the laughs come from the irreverent way it treats the whole cast, with many extras dying gruesome deaths, but it can quickly get abrasive if that's not your sort of thing. Definitely shines brighter in the earlier seasons than the later ones. 

Kite Man, Hell Yeah is a currently one season spin off from Harley Quinn and follows the adventures of the guy whose power is he has a kite? It has the same tone too so if you like the main show you'd probably like it.

Ouroborus King and Rogue Waters

Two different roguelikes.

Ouroborus King

The weak story about a King reclaiming his lands doesn't cover up the fact that this is simply chess with a variety of unique pieces. You start with only four, and on your journey can "recruit" more, "upgrade" the ones you have, or find relics that do some neat stuff like take back your previous move. Not recommended unless you really like chess.

Rogue Waters

This roguelike has a lot more effort put into it with the art and animation and tells the story of an undead pirate seeking revenge. Combat starts with three rounds of exchanging cannon fire where you either target enemy cannons so they don't wreck you, enemy soldiers so you don't have to fight them later, or "modules" that provide many buffs to their owners.

Afterwards it becomes tactical grid combat with a focus on pushing (and some cool abilities). While you will lose a lot at the start, especially to annoying cut scenes, it really gets addictive once you start upgrading your ship and crew. Thumbs up for this one!

Brightburn and Boy Kills World

Movies about a boy killing the world?

Brightburn

A husband and wife praying for a child have their wishes granted when one falls from the sky in an alien spacecraft. They raise the kid as best as they can but going with nature always wins over nurture, once the kid hits puberty he starts getting violent and powerful. So yeah, this horror movie basically answers "what happens if superman was bad and somewhat sadistic"? It's goes just about as you'd expect which is not great. Predictable movies are predictable.

Boy Kills World

This action comedy movie takes predictable and throws it out the window. With a mute protagonist who is always voiced over and wants to revenge on the woman who controls everything through violence, the action scenes are great but totally unbelievable given the amount of bullets that miss our hero. It's funny with some really wacky parts (drugs!) but also gory which makes it a hard one to know who their target audience is. Me? So yes, the main plot is good but getting from point A to B is very convoluted, ridiculous and sometimes hilarious while the violence, especially the martial arts violence is well done. Worth putting on while you're doing something else if only to pay attention when the fight scenes start up.

Hogwarts: Legacy and Calico

Games of Magic (and animal abduction :P)!

Hogwarts: Legacy

Set in the world of the popular Harry Potter series but taking place much earlier, you get to play as a student in the magical academy and quickly get involved in a plot that only you "the chosen one" can resolve. But also, you need to attend class, explore the (vast) lands around, while helping (or not helping) other students and residents. This also involves doing some Pokemon by capturing saving a variety of magical beasts and putting them in your own pens for your personal use. Also, expect to be beating the absolute shite out of your opponents in this one to the point of "I don't need the killing curse because its so much more satisfying to break all your bones, cut you into pieces and then explode you from inside out, MUAHAHAHAAHAH!".

So yes, while I enjoyed it there are a couple of negatives: while there is broom riding there's no Quidditch (which is fine I guess), and despite the huge map the activities are kind of repetitive. Go here and clear a cave, go there and clear a cave. Oh a puzzle. Oh its the same sort of puzzle but elsewhere. Lastly, unskippable lines in cut scenes. Sure, you can skip the entire cut scene but you can't read faster than the voice actors (who do a wonderful job btw) and press a button to go to the next sentence like in other games. Is that one a minor point? Well, there's loads of lengthy cut scenes so you tell me. Still recommended, especially if you like Harry Potter.

Calico

In this pastel color game you are in a magical land where all the animals are friendly so you can pick them up, let them sit on your head, and take them to the cat cafe you are trying to open which you can also interior decorate to your hearts content. Also, just to add to the WTF factor you can prepare food... by shrinking down to a tiny size and then running around the kitchen like an action game to grab ingredients and basketball them into the boiling cauldron? Yeah, it lost me there at that point. I guess I'm not magical enough for this game. :P

Evil Black Phone

Shows about the supernatural!

Evil (TV series)

In this four season show a psychologist, a priest in training, and a tech expert make up the Catholic Church's assessor program, which takes on cases to determine if people have demonic possession or are just crazy, because the two actually look very much alike. It is very well written and well acted (especially the little kids) and 90% of the show is just cool character growth, world building and plot advancing. The other 10% is made up of horror which shows up every now and again, and holding back on it actually makes it super effective. Big thumbs up for this one, I highly recommend it.

Black Phone (1 and 2)

When a young quiet boy is taken by a kidnapper, he ends up having to rely on voices from a disconnected black phone to help him out - voices of the kidnapper's previous victims. While yes, that's a pretty scary situation to be in, there's not so much horror to it if the ghosts are on the protagonists side. I do like that everything the kid does that seems for naught actually plays a part in the end, but its almost like the bad guy doesn't stand a chance here. 

In the second film years have passed and now it focuses on the sister of the quiet boy, a sister who gets strange visions and ropes in people to go with her to a frozen camp to follow the clues (there's still a disconnected black phone there, don't worry), only to discover its where the kidnapper from the first movie started his killing spree. Yay for there being a bad ghost this time around which makes for some scarier moments but when said bad ghost starts to ice skate... um...

It's interesting that the second film succeeds both in being scarier but also in being a less interesting movie. All up, give number one a try and if you really liked it, continue with number two. Or just watch Evil which is much better, but a bigger time investment. :P

Oddsparks Lonestar and the Stone of Madness

Three games that are just not for me.

Oddsparks: An Automation Adventure

As you explore this fantasy world you will need to create a bunch of cute helpers to help you do things, like forage, chop trees and... fight? That last one isn't so much of a problem, but the whole idea of this one revolves on automating processes using your helpers like batteries to power magical machinery and conveyor belts to make components turn into other things and so on. The grind is not hidden from the start either, with early quests requiring hundreds of processed materials to complete. I'd probably have given this one more of a chance had I not gotten sick of the whole conveyor belt processor puzzle thing from Arknights: Endfield. 

Lonestar

In this rogue like, you get to pick a pilot from a random trio of options and a ship (based on your level) to then go do some bounty hunting! Majority of this game is turn based battles which are simply about putting power components in your guns and other ship components and then blasting the enemy as it does the same to you. Whoever has the higher numbers hits the other guy, and if you have fuel you can do tiny manuevers to dodge some enemy firing lanes. Minor events in between fights let you refuel, shop, upgrade or treasure hunt, often with a cost and then its onto the next target. Again this gets super grindy very quick.

Side note: Grindy much like Green Hell's: Spirits of Amazonia expansion. OMG. We enjoyed the base game but in this one they decided that you need to do thousands of things over and over just to advance the story. No thanks!

Stone of Madness

A stealth game with awesome hand drawn animation set inside an insane asylum!? This should be right up my alley! Except, its a stealth MANAGEMENT game. You see in it, you (playing as a priest) must assemble a squad of people with special abilities - like a strong guy and a violent woman. While you can only control one person at a time, your other two squadies can either wait or follow you. Except all of you are actually crazy. The strong guy hates darkness and can't be left there. The woman hates fire and can't do anything near it. The priest hates violence so has to be away when the woman is murdering guards. Only the priest can deal with the ghosts that come up at night. What!? Ugh, so yes. As much as I wanted to like this the management part of it was too annoying for me. Recommended though if you don't mind that sort of thing!

Jack Ryan: Ghost War and Punisher: One Last Kill

When you need gun action!

Jack Ryan: Ghost War

This flick continues on from the series and finds a retired Jack Ryan (still played by John Krasinki) being roped back into what's supposed to be an easy mission "to meet a guy", but its never that simple. Chase scenes and combat sequences shortly follow but plot wise I can't help but think that Jack was only required for the second half or last third of the movie, as it looked like all the other characters had it handled - even the comedy relief guy? My overall feeling is that unfortunately, the movie is weak. :(

Punisher: One Last Kill

This episode length special continues its series, starring Jon Bernthal as Frank Castle now better known as the titular vigilante. In it, it explores what happens when Frank's killed everyone he's wanted to kill and goes too deep in his own head. But don't worry! Bad guys are stupid and by the second half he is back to ruthlessly executing the hordes of scum that decide to take him on. For its length and given it works as a standalone, it's super entertaining! Recommended! :) 

As a bonus for other gun nuts, here's a review of the Zev FDP gun... which turns out to not be so practical. 

More than Nothing: Finding Warmth

[Part of the Party Time journal]

On the other side of the forest the team makes their way up the Stone Dragon mountain where Eagley says the profitable pink salt trade has stopped for some reason. Asking at a tribal camp they learn it was due to the sudden appearance of Mikra (abominable snow men things) after an earthquake. Rather than ask any more questions they start heading up the snow covered mountain (Eagley buys them warm coats) and ignore a wind-blocking campsite (with dead bodies under the snow) to forge on into the night and howling winds - taking cold damage as they do so.

Half a dozen Mikra appear and are slain just before the PCs start dying themselves, and Jerghonson has the great idea of pulling the corpses together and sleeping inside them for warmth (like Star Wars). The next morning Bal Bahadur and four assistants find them and declares he's going to solve the Mikra issue, asking for their help, offering 1% of the future pink salt profit and shared credit for their troubles. Aah convinces him (with a good dice roll) to make that 90% of the profit but he can keep all the credit. At the summit they find a dark cave in the rock face where no doubt the Mikra are coming from and so work to collapse it - doing so before the sun sets again.

They manage to make it back to the village where Bal declares the threat ended and pays the team their earnings. They and Eagley quickly get out of there in case Bal's over confidence is unfounded. Their last stop is the town of Drystan, near a swamp. Luckily its leader, Lord Moroney - the best physician in the region (I introduced him accidentally killing someone who had a cold), is already an ally to Praetor Artorias and outfits them with better arms and armor. While waiting for the Praetor to arrive he asks they look into the "toad demon" tribe in the swamps who have recently become organized and have started kidnapping his townsfolk in raid. They also all seem to only have one hand?

The squad finds them easily enough in their swamp. Hundreds of them. Jerghonson prays to Luna for assistance and this time becomes a big wolf himself, then howls to get majority of the tribesmen chasing him (in vain, he's too fast as a wolf) while the rest circle around to an important looking ruin where they fight more tribals and hand-spiders (Mamita again leading a good spear throw), rescue the now handless victims, and slay their leader (Mamita and Ugh snipe him) - who turns out to be caravaner Jhonen!? The remaining tribesmen lose all cohesion and don't give chase.

Returning to Drystan with the captives they learn Jhonen always had it out for Moroney, as Moroney was unable to cure Jhonen's wife of a sickness (probably also a cold).

More than Nothing: A Tale of Creatures

[Part of the Party Time journal]

At the next stop of Wallen they learn bandits had recently robbed them and kidnapped purple haired Pellestina, so they go track and take them down which was easy because they were all drunk and celebrating a big pay day for selling the woman to the Brown Buzzard who lairs further in the woods. Despite already having the money, the continue on to try rescue the girl finding strange violent hooded men who speak in buzzes and explode into bee swarms when "slain". 

The swarms eventually leave and the team finds Pellestina tied by vines in the hollow of a tree. The woman pleads to be taking back to her village but also starts speaking in buzzes. Ughh tells everyone to leave first and blind folds the woman before using "his knowledge of being a colony of possums" to "possum-no-jutsu-massage" the bees out of her, saving her life!

Upon returning to Eagley, Aah assists in fighting off a few more attackers then learns that some of their soldiers have deserted - especially after finding out what Eagley did to "take care" of the previous troublemaker. With a number of arrested bandits now in tow, Eagley also sends a squad of soldiers to take the prisoners back to Partopia while they press on into the lands of Goatgetterville ruled by Empress Palisa. It's well known that she was in love with the late Aeternan Emperor Julian and that she would be also working on her own claim to the throne so Eagley suggests of an opportunity to support a drug trafficer in the capital city which would benefit them and hurt her. The team flatly disagrees and bypasses her city altogether and continue onto Twain.

En route, Aah saves a little girl who had snuck into the tomb of Ug "father of the pack", from its resident Jba'fofi (giant spider). The over a hundred years old leader of Twain, Jerg, thanks them and lets them rest in town but says they have no funds to give as the Empresses' tax men have already come. There's supposedly treasure in a canyon tomb nearby, which is where he sent the other tax men, but the team have no interest in confronting them. Jerg then tells them that a now "over" protective magical statue (constructed by a wastard / "a son of a witch" hired by Mama Yapa) blocks the way between Twain and Goatgetter village, making trade difficult. Magical waves of force push people back but Aah is the one who finally reaches the thing and deactivates it.

In thanks, Ma, the new leader of Goatgetter Village provides them with spears and funding. She also warns them of the dangerous forest they plan to travel to next but it doesn't stop them from going right down the middle of it to a large clearing where the corpse of a giant rainbow snake is pinned to the ground with a spear. Angry apes soon surround them, confirming that they slew their own god for demanding too much tribute, and they don't let any who enter their territory survive. Mamita leads the troops in an excellent spear throw, keeping nullifying the first wave of apes while Jerghonson rushes up the giant snake corpse and pulls the god spear.

Suddenly the great snake QQ quickly regenerates and in a rage begins to wipe out the apes. Eagley gets everyone moving before it turns on them!

More than Nothing: Bad Allies

[Part of the Party Time journal]

Outside town the team group up with seasoned tax collector Eagley, who acts as their guide. While he and the rest of the squad guard the treasure box it is up to the four PCs to actually do the collecting - starting with the dirty pig village of Thorsen, where leader Rorke's plan to make them go through some humiliating trial for taking his daughter with them previously is foiled by Ughh who manages to simply threaten payment out of them.

Their next stop is a small "hippie" berry-eating community of Gossett whose sing songy spokesperson Dylmah says all their money went with some of the young folk to pay a hermit deeper in the woods to learn how to hunt. None of them have returned. Ughh forces Dylmah to take them there in a thunderstorm and sure enough in a rickety old shack is Rash the hermit who admits all of the rookies became prey to the many wolves around. Aah convinces him for a refund which he obliges to, but on their way out they are surrounded by wolves and Rash himself transforms into a werewolf!

Jerghonson manages to summon Luna again who charges Rash back into and through his hut (no trace of either of them after) while the others fend off the wolves, with the few remaining ones running away. Ughh breaks Dylmah's legs there for leading them into a trap and wishes her luck making it back on her own. 

Returning back to Eagley they find their convoy had repelled an attack, but one of their members (a convicted judge who took bribes) is missing. It doesn't take long to find him being eaten by one of their cannibal allies who they then arrest, but the cannibal claims innocence - he didn't kill the man, he was just hungry. Mamita does note there is a single puncture mark in the victim's neck, which leads to another of their ex-con soldiers who happens to be knitting at the time - a woman who was jailed for poisoning her husband (and many others). She says the ex-judge had it coming since he was the one who found her guilty. They tell Eagley about it and he says he'll deal with it.

After resting up at a road side inn and declining to stay for the evening wrestling match that might earn more gold, they find the poisoner missing and Eagley confirming not to worry about her and that he "dealt with it".

Plot armor was used!

Jerghonson remembers how his brother and biggest rival Jimgon managed to solve a maze puzzle faster than he did by "following the right wall" and how Jimgon could always go past his limits to beat him physically as well.

Ughh remembers that while he looks like a person he isn't one - he replaced the real Ughh in the forest years ago. In reality he's actually a hivemind colony of possums.

More than Nothing: Back to Partopia

[Part of the Party Time journal]

Soon a messenger bird arrives with orders that splits the team. Ughh and Aah stay with the dig team who uncover a giant hand behind a stone door that squishes 12 of the miners before it is defeated, while Mamita and Jerghonson along with half the soldiers go to the mining town of Jellyroll which is in threat of being overrun by Bhir'Beli forces. They are to hold the line until reinforcements arrive.

Upon arriving the mine leader tricks them and locks them in one of the mine shafts though, saying they've already made a deal with the Bhir'Belians and handing them over to the invaders (due to arrive soon) will do much to foster relations with them. Leaving them there Jerghonson prays to his moon goddess Luna (chosen upon character creation) who hears his call, appearing as a giant wolf that occupies most of the tunnels. She mauls a lone guard and opens the gate before wandering off. 

Rather than escape, the team digs pit traps in the mine and waits in hiding along side passages. The ambush is successful when the mine leader and Bhir'Beli advance party arrive, and only one Bhir'Beli soldier manages to escape to his horse and flee with incredible speed. Jerghonson then takes the mine leaders head and threatens the remaining Jellyroll citizens who then all scatter and flee, knowing the punishment for treason. 

Soon enough a new regiment from Partopia arrives and after ascertaining the situation decides its not worth dying over a dead town. They torch it and collapse the mine, sending the PC party back to Partopia where they regroup with the expedition team who have also returned with a good haul of artifacts. It is at this time that Captain Tamir informs all of them that Emperor Julian has been assassinated, and the previously allied lords of Aeternea are now making claims for the throne. They will back their patron, Praetor Artorias, and their new duty is to collect funding and support from as many people as they can. Aah easily convinces her stepfather Governor Quintus to help.

On their way out of the city they defend a young girl being pursued by stake wielding assailants and the last attacker, a man named I'lbakstabyo who works for Numero Uno ("god" of the very oppressed Numerologist religion) claims the "girl" is a vampire who has taken the form of the child which it killed. A house guard of the girl recognizes her and takes her back to her family though, and while the team try to warn the guard of potential vampy-ness he remains unmoved and they are unwilling to do more - apart from take I'lbakstabyo to jail.

They're also approached by a woman who claims to be the widow of thief King Autolycus who asks them to get the gem of the Crocagator located in his vault, be returned to her. She's afraid she'll be killed if she goes after it herself and gives the team instructions how to get there via a secret door in the sewers. Beyond they are surprised to find a Crocagator temple with worshipers that Jerghonson manages to befriend with tales he heard about their predecessor Testikles of the fisher people. They opt out of the mission deciding the widow is too shady for their liking.

More than Nothing: Black Vale Expedition

[Part of the Party Time journal]

After more weeks of police work the team save a pregnant woman being chased by some idiotic thugs that keep yelling "Pale-dogs!" (their gang name). The woman thanks them for the save and continues on her way to the temple of Koochikoo while the others track down the Paledog leader in a run down house in the city. He reveals they were paid to slay the woman with the still moist offertory box from the temple itself, so they quickly rush there to find the very lecherous priest Carpef organizing some "friends" to take care of her. All the bad guys are arrested and Carpef admits that he needs the woman killed because he had a vision her baby (his child) would bring about the end of the world. But he couldn't kill her himself because he's devout!?

They are then joined by new recruits (all the survivors from the prison) to join caravaner Jhonen's archeological expedition to find treasure for Praetor Artorias. They first stop at Thorsen, a filthy pig farm, where a young woman named Jalla asks to join the mission - because she hates it there. Her father Rorke is against this but Ughh makes him back off. 

While traveling alongside a river Aah goes to save a drowning person only to find its a trap by a quartet of great river cats with hands for tails and human voices! Unfortunately the cats didn't count on there being so many soldiers and Jerghonson leads the militia to bash them to death before they can do anything.

Upon entering the Black Vale, bitterworm has spoiled over 70% of the caravan rations and the dark mountain men that live here move their flocks away but send a scout to keep tabs on them. It is a temple of theirs to their god Popeta that Jhonen wants to uncover, and sure enough near a mountain summit the 30 extra miners uncover a belfry they can descend (which saves a lot of digging)!

Jhonen, 5 soldiers, Ughh and Aah rappel down with the miners where they find an odd looking altar - a humanoid form above what seems to be a hand, and sudden movement in the surrounding ash reveals many "hands" / handspiders that come to attack them - with one managing to climb up a miner and puppeteer him! The hands are of little threat with the organized defenders though.

The defense upstairs is good too, led by Mamita and Jerghonson the mountain men's pincer attack raid is easily foiled (despite losing four men) when they kill over half the attackers in one combat round, routing the enemy immediately!

More than Nothing: Partopian Police

[Part of the Party Time journal]

Having been arrested and stripped of all gear, the teens find themselves in an arena with seventeen other prisoners in a trial by combat against four sabretooth cats! Ughh spends most of his time convincing the other NPCs to fight while Jerghonson makes the cats hit each other while Aah and Mamita dextrously do acrobatics to avoid them. Ultimately, all the cats are slain and the eight survivors (the four PCs, their friends Waywocket and Rowina, and previous race contestants Yuriet and Crixus) are congratulated by Praetor Artorias who then recruits them into his army so that they can be more than nothing. 

It is night time, beneath a handful of stars, when the recruits officially graduate and are given clubs and blue tunics. Captain Tamir tells them that Aeteran Emperor Julian is in need of man power in a war against the hordes of Bhir'Beli to the South, so the new recruits will serve as the Partopian police force while veteran soldiers are sent off to battle. 

Their first few missions are simple affairs: clearing out a blockage in the sewer caused by some whack job trying to make bigger rats, find the stolen offering box from the temple of Koochikoo (stolen by the simple groundsman who wanted to impress a girl but the girl then tossed it in the river, Ughh makes her go swim for it), and being temporary prison guards to an underground jail where incarcerated criminals were recently vanishing (one of the locked up people was a shape shifting slime, eating the others in their sleep - set on fire by Aah after Ughh discovers it).

They also retrieve a wagon for caravaner Jhonen from some bandits who pose as farm hands who are no match for the team that have a surprisingly cinematic fight sequence with them (the players tell me what they do and the dice decide if it works or not, I only decide the effectiveness of the action or the repercussions for failure).

Plot armor was used this time (mainly in the arena)!

Jerghonson had a sibling Jimgonson who was always his biggest rival as he was much wiser, claiming "you're not smart enough to read my books!"

Mamita always had a hard time making friends because she's smarter than them.

Ughh has a story when his caretakers lost him in a forest as he was "hiding in the shadows". Ever since that time could merge with the shadows as long as no one is looking.

Aah was a street orphan but she was taken in by Governor Quintus. While delivering vegetables for Quintus to a market stall one day she gave some to a beggar figuring they wouldn't be missed.

More than Nothing: Those Thieving Teens

[Part of the Party Time journal]

At Partopia (after a time skip), a bunch of teenagers including Ughh, son of Ugh (Juris), Aah, daughter of Sith (Rose), Mamita, the daughter of Mama (Mom), and Jerghonson, the son of Jerghon the great (DL) have been roped in by their friends Waywocket and Rowina into a race across the city for some free drinks. Mamita ends up winning this with Aah's help, who physically body blocked Yuriet, another race competitor into a river.

Enjoying their drinks at the tavern they learn of another contest, this time one of thieving. The rules are no killing, no buying, and only it can only be a singular item (so lots of coins won't count) from within the city of high worth to impress the thief "king" Autolycus who promises a nice reward to the winner. Rowina and Waywocket want to participate and be more than nothing and... I am surprised my usually goody two shoes players goes for it! Getting some promising leads from the bartender they all pick different targets to rob!

Aah and Waywocket steal a jeweled crown from a jeweler's store via some Mission Impossible skylight acrobatics, Jerghonson frees a harem of high value slaves from a slave trader via distracting the guards away, and Ughh has a challenging time breaking into Governor Quintus' manor fortress via wall climbing, sneaking past multiple guard patrols and breaking into the Governor's vault which is only filled with sentimental artifacts like an arrowhead and a broken sword. 

Mamita has the easiest time plucking an "Everliving flower" from the temple of Koochikoo (a diety of growth) but the "Everliving" part turns out to be a lie as it wilts just as she presents it to Autolycus. Also fake is the crown Aah stole from the jewelers as it is the replica Autolycus placed there himself after he stole the real thing. The thief king refuses to put a value on the lives of the slaves Jerghonson rescued, disqualifying him from the contest but at the same time earning some massive applause as that well known slave trader he stole them from is a douche, and Ughh's stolen trinkets get him nowhere. (PCs didn't ask around enough for better targets) 

Despite losing the contest (some kid got the key to the city somehow lol) all participants are given a small gem as a token of Autolycus' appreciation before he then sets up a different challenge: the assassination of Governor Quintus! The team decide to nope the hell out of that one but as they are leaving soldiers (having been tipped off) arrive and arrest the vast majority of them (Autolycus escapes) and they soon find themselves sent to the arena for the amusement of the crowd...

Paradise Killer Trash Goblin Sunderfolk

Three chillaxing games.

Paradise Killer

In this first person detective game you need to find out who killed a bunch of people on Paradise island. With easy controls, a very beautiful 3D map and a cool sound track it really makes it an inviting place to explore. I do wonder then why the place is populated only by a dozen or so 2D anime sprite characters who don't move? There's a bit of backtracking to talk to people and find things but my main problem is that in the game's narrative the world is about to end and reset anyway so it feels like its all for naught and doesn't matter. This one is an odd duck for sure.

Trash Goblin

In this game you are a newbie goblin tinkerer in a fantasy city with an endless supply of junk that you need to chisel the grime off, clean and possibly put together to then sell to visitors that come by (or at the market when you unlock that) - and then you can upgrade your tools and little basement shop using said funds. So its a lot like Toy Tinkerer which I really enjoyed until they put so much grind into it. While this one also has a bit of grind, there's also a story to follow which I very much appreciate - and there's no real negative consequences to deal with. Can't supply what someone is asking for? It's ok, they'll come back another time. Run out of money? No problem, you'll be able to sell stuff eventually and your shop somehow has ZERO expenses (all expenses are just to make your life easier) so you can just ignore everyone / close the store window and focus on assembling stuff if you like. I really like this one. :) 

Sunderfolk

This game feels like Gloomhaven light. In it you play a fantasy party who take turns strategizing and battling on hex maps using your available "cards" to move. Unlike Gloomhaven those cards aren't "two sided" and don't get removed from your deck. The story and art is pretty cute and the town interactions are fine, but most of the game is the combat itself which is pretty decent - until they slowly but surely push every encounter more into the "puzzle" territory rather than keep it tactical. Once it got to the bit where I had to position enemies and characters on pressure plates at the same time,  which is easy enough but freaking annoying, it no longer was fun for me.

Doomblade Arranger Down in Bermuda

Three Epic freebies that aren't so epic.

Doomblade

This platformer has you playing as an imp who follows some whispers that lead her to the titular sword (an opening that worked for Conan right?). This sword is bloodthirsty though and soon enough you'll be backtracking your way through enemies like mad. Backtracking. I hate it. Also there's a strange design decision here where your character is actually kinda slow and not super agile, but if there's an enemy you can click on with your mouse cursor you fly directly at it with the sword. Half the time this kills them. The other half it just stuns them because they are needed for platform traversal. I didn't like it.

Arranger

This is a super strange puzzle game because when you move, everything in your row or column moves with you - looping around to opposite ends if possible. This means the fastest way down a hall is usually to walk into the wall behind you so that you appear on the other end! That sounds neat, but most of the game is trying to move stuff to exact places, and not everything can be conveyor belted around. You want to kill that worm thing in the way? Work out how to move the sword to its face. You want to open the locked door? Work out how to move the key from point A to point B. It's definitely different, and while I didn't mind the village stuff as there's story there - once you get out into the wilderness it feels like there are puzzles in the way just for the sake of puzzles being in the way.

Down in Bermuda

In this kiddie friendly puzzle game you move from island to island after unlocking the "gates" in each, but the game play is more akin to Boxes: Lost Fragments where the islands themselves serve as a box that you (as god/the player) can manipulate which is really handy because these islands have buttons, levers, and locks that need keys? Not the sort of puzzle game I thought it would be. Not recommended.

Fear the Spotlight and Sorry We're Closed

Two horror LGBT Games.

Fear the Spotlight

A nerdy girl agrees to help her goth chick crush sneak into the school library to conduct a seance during a thunderstorm and, yeah - bad things start to happen! With blocky graphics and an intentionally bad shaky cam this actually isn't a bad horror game that's decent at building tension with some decent jump scares and a "sneak past the monster mechanic" while solving the puzzles that keep increasing in difficulty. I was pleasantly surprised by this one - it might not look like much but its pretty good. Recommended!

Sorry We're Closed

Keeping in vein with the above, this game has got demons and monsters and possibly zero straight characters and a bit of a step up art wise, though a fair bit of it is odd. It isn't a stealth game though and instead plays more like Resident Evil with all its fixed camera angles and needing to save at pay phones. While its still a horror (of a more adult variety) its not as scary as the above, simply because you can fight and destroy the monsters in your way. It's annoying that they respawn though, and that there's a fair bit of backtracking. While I liked this one, I felt Fear the Spotlight is better.

Eurovision 2026

This years Eurovision has come and gone, and surprisingly there was a shortage on "women lacking gowns". Instead we got nice gowns, some opera, men in armored gowns, face masks, a silver man, a cat man, a banging Moldovan song, a trip back in time with nice dance moves, some mandatory witches, someone setting the stage on fire, a bonkers UK entry, and a few acts into rope play? The winner had a pretty catchy tune, and I think you can appreciate the awesome choreography more from this audience POV video! That last link is a must watch!

I also very much appreciated the Wasted Boat comedy opening by the hosts which is a parody of last year's winning song, Wasted Love.

For some bonus non-Eurovision tunes, here's Lyv's bardic music channel once again - she's been making a whole bunch of songs! And if you need something *much* heavier after all that, how about "Wrecking Ball, but in the style of Linkin Park"?

Take it easy everyone! :)

Mongil: Star Dive and Girl's Front Line 2: Exilium

F2P games with gacha fanservice!

Mongil: Star Dive

This game is set in a fantasy land where fauna are starting to exhibit violent tendencies and its up to a squad of monster -hunter- tamers to sort it out. Good graphics, excellent animation, an interesting actiony fight system and a good dose of humor are all very welcome surprises in here (as well as being simpler than some of its competitors). The humor especially as the game plays out much like a comedy, including the "taming" process itself. 

That said it is still very "new" with lots of empty unused spaces that you can just tell will be for future content. Also the leveling up system for your random party and their gear, is quite a grind once you hit those level walls which you'll get to sooner than you think. Again, it might just be a case of being new but that killed the game for me.

Girl's Front Line 2: Exilium

This game is set in a post apocalyptic land where fauna ARE violent, just like the numerous PMCs you go up against with your squad of combat "dolls". Yep, its very Ghost in the Shell here with disposable bodies, body parts, and consciousness backups and uploads. Combat here plays more like XCOM and has a puzzle challenge component to it (kill 3 guys in the first round etc) which is neat - though you can also get one support "doll" from someone else and just deploy a level 60 each time to power your way through. :P

The story pieces come in fully voiced (no English dub) visual novel style which I find annoying, but the stories themselves are pretty neat and the art is quite good. While there's also a grindy component to level up your squad its easier to do so here than in Mongil, and because its an older game there are many game modes available to play through even if you find yourself lacking resources or levels to forge on through the main story. Recommended, but be careful as this is an addictive time sink!

Mayor of Kingstown and The Madison

Another pair of Taylor Sheridan shows!

Mayor of Kingstown

Kingstown must be a crappy place to live, especially if its only feature are the number of prisons nearby. The titular "Mayor" is not actually the real mayor of the city, but a fixer (played by Jeremy Renner) who tries to find creative solutions to keep the peace between the cops and the various warring gangs. He's definitely well connected, isn't afraid of getting his hands dirty, and usually doesn't have things go his way which makes for an interesting show, even if he spends at least 40% of each episode talking on the phone while driving ins his car. I'm just curious why everyone seems to listen to him? Still I've very much enjoyed the four seasons of this so far and am looking forward to seeing how it concludes in the fifth.

The Madison

This so far one season "slice of life" show follows a woman played by Michelle Pfieffer and her city based family deal with the sudden loss of her very outdoorsy husband, and finally going to his favorite spot on Earth (the Madison River) to visit his now empty cabins. While the main theme of this show so far seems to be dealing (or not dealing) with grief, there are some funny moments and some introspective ones too which make it interesting. I did not like the extended time in the opening episode on fishing though, but hey, that's just me. It's funny how easy it is to hate some of the characters though. That's something Mr. Sheridan writes really well. :P Not sure yet if this is recommendation worthy, but I'll be watching season two when it arrives.  

Kill Lupercal and Space King

Warhammer 40K, and 40K adjacent?

Kill Lupercal

This short three episode series focuses on a titan crew as they deploy to defend Terra against the forces of chaos led by Horus Lupercal, once the most favored son of the Emperor of Mankind. While the "extras" don't have the best CGI the main characters and titans are well done, with nice action bits to accentuate the all too short story oozing in dark 40K goodness. Recommended especially for those who like Warhammer related stuff!

Space King

This animated youtube series follows a bunch of -space- psycho marines on their quest to find their missing god, the titular Space King, and is a hilarious take on the "totally not warhammer 40k" universe. Definitely for a more mature audience, and again if you like Warhammer 40K you might get a laugh from this. Go check it out, it's free on youtube!

Tron: Ares and Wake up, Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery

Sequels that continue a franchise.

Tron: Ares

In a world where arcade game machines have enough power to create a fully immersive and digital world that you can enter by "digitizing" yourself, this latest movie of Tron actually goes the other way around where a created program (played by Jared Leto) wants to export itself to the real world. While the effects are much better than the older Tron movies (except the part that intentionally goes old school), there are some major plot holes that you'll need to jump over. Like, if Jared Leto is your best program why wouldn't you just make multiples of him instead of making different, inferior versions? Even non-techy audiences will need to leave common sense at the door.

Wake up, Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery

Benoit Blanc (played by Daniel Craig) is back, this time solving an impossible crime in a small parish with a crazy priest and a small congregation of psycho almost-cultists. Like the previous movies this one has good cinematography and a pretty interesting puzzle to solve. While there's a bit of "god bashing" in it mostly done for laughs, I do like that it's tempered with the "good priest". Also, it's definitely better than the second movie (Glass Onion). Recommended! 

More than Nothing: The Axolotl

[Part of the Party Time journal]

Barricading the way behind them in case the blue gnomes heard the fighting (they did), the team hurriedly descends to the lowest level where they come across a large cavern crawling with blind miners going back and forth. They have to navigate this as quietly as possible and do very well until Ugh rushes the last bit attracting attention at the very end. A cave in saves them from the blind miners, but now they're trapped in another chamber with the thing that caused the cave in, a great Axolotl type lizard with many legs munching on a blind miner! It turns with great interest to the new snacks that just arrived (queue boss music)!

Jerghon the Great leads it one way (its basically playing snake - moves fast but can only turn 3 times during its move) to let the others run through the tunnel it came through, then dodges it to follow. They reach another section of blind miners but with the "well" down to the underground river in sight and the lizard hot in pursuit they decide to sprint through them, losing Doxxer before jumping into the fast flowing river below - which proves to be very long and just as deadly. None of their remaining NPC allies survive it (alas poor Ungala, Winnie and the nameless folk), but the four of them eventually wake in some sort of tent with other mine survivors who had jumped the well before them and are now guarded by foreign looking guys.

An official named Quintus soon arrives and says that his men pulled them from the water, and that they're now all a long way from Goat Getterville. Quintus admits he is not a generous soul but offers a deal: that they all work for him to finish his half-built city of Partopia and in exchange they can become citizens if they so wish. But its an all or nothing offer. Either all of them leave and chance the wilderness or accept the deal. 

Since the other survivors are leaning towards staying, the four leaders agree to the deal as its more than nothing and help finish the city over the next five years - after which they all depart back to Goat Getterville... leaving their kids behind.

Plot armor was used this time!

-Master Builder Ugh used to be a farmer who walked away from a juvenile snake on his farm.

-Master Warden Jerghon the Great didn't care that the community previously thought he was a good for nothing layabout for working on a game involving rolling stones.

-Master Miner Mama had a lazy neighbor called Chitty Chatty who asked help to plant her field. Mama agreed because the neighbor helped her previously with something, and while doing so Mama found a blood ruby gem in the neighbors field which she secretly kept for herself.

-Overseer Sith was previously a hunter with a side kick called "Big Man". After tracking a dangerous ostrich by smell one hunt, Big Man then wanted to earn the bounty of an ostrich feather by reporting that he slew the beast and made her look incompetent. Sith then killed Big Man and took the feather for herself.

More than Nothing: The Great Mine

[Part of the Party Time journal]

Empress Palisa, the daughter of "Rou the beheader" and leader of the Goat Getterville nation could see the value in the precious metals hidden in the ground and commissioned a great mine constructed - overseen by our new heroes: Master Miner Mama (Mom) the daughter of Ma, Master Warden Jerghon the Great (DL) who is the grandson of Jerg, Master Builder Ugh (Juris) the third cousin of Ugh, and Overseer Sith (Rose) the neighbor of Rou.

[We had a bit of a mad-libs session prior to this where they basically designed the mine and its problems by taking turns with my prompts with hilarious results, so most of this bit of the adventure is of their own making :P]

Over the years the mine slowly became more and more dangerous and we pick up as the leaders attempt to evacuate everyone out. Alas, an earthquake sends them plummeting down one level into an underground lake which in unusable due to all the possum pee in it. Determined to escape and to be more than nothing, they and three other nameless survivors head back upstairs only to find the exit collapsed, but they manage to scare a bunch of angry possums away from a barricaded door to the barracks. 

Inside is the now elderly Winnie who can sense there's a way out through a deep underground river at the lowest level which he knows about due to his fisher people heritage. After Mama helps the team avoid a minor cave in, the team descends to the prison level (which the leaders agreed to build down here) and release Dodo, a saboteur descended from the Ostrich Riders; Doxxer, a spy who knows Jerghon's secret (that he still carries Mmmbop's ponytail); and Ungala - a deep scout who reports the rest of his unit was bitten by rabid possums. 

The result of the bite is clearly seen in his buddy Bunga, locked in a separate cell. The now blind man paces back and forth predictably but when he hears a noise he charges aggressively and attacks in that direction. 

With that knowledge they continue down, sneaking past strange blue gnomes now looting diamonds from a doorway broken open by Dodo and reach the illegal Ostrich rider hideout below. They send Dodo in first to calm his compatriots down but he gets torn apart by giant rabid possums that then rush the party, slaying one of the "spare" nameless guys before the team manages to defeat the beasties with their pickaxes.

More than Nothing: Rou the Beheader

[Part of the Party Time journal]

Sometime later the Goat Getter village is flourishing, but Shania arrives with a request to help defend Twain against the expanding territories of Tan-ned - a large city to the North, forcing villages to join or die. They agree that this threat is more than nothing and arrive just in time to defend against the pony tailed forces of Akin-Ka, but are caught by surprise by their ponytail dagger throw which kills many of the defenders. Rou and Ug's use of "I am bright!" saves the day, blinding the enemy forces who are then massacred. Rou beheads Akin-Ka post mortem.

With Shania insisting on pressing the advantage, she rallies more fighters and they them march unopposed all the way to Tan-ned which is strangely undefended? Sensing a trap they divide their forces in two, Shania and half the warriors will hold outside while the Goat Getter heroes enter the "palace temple" (just a covered platform higher than the other buildings) with the other half. Sure enough, Tan-ned's leader Mmmbop is there waiting for them with his guards and uses the powers of his god "wormy" to explode people into wriggling masses worms (by wiggling his fingers and chanting "wormy wormy wormy").

The team rush forward through the defense, and the defenders fail their ponytail dagger through after Rou throws the head of Akin-Ka at them! Mmmbop also critically fails trying to worm-splode Jerg so instead his fingers all turn into worms and fall off. Rou then hits him with a knife to the leg before Jerg captures him and leads him out to the overlooking balcony, where Rou publicly beheads him. This routs the remaining enemies.

Alas, Shania died in the battle outside but everyone else - including the rest of Tan-ned's oppressed citizens now see the four as their saviors and rejoice at Mmmbop's defeat and years pass in relative peace as the Goat Getters inherit the amassed territories of their enemy!

[This is the end of the current characters as I force retire them, and not one of them used any plot armor :P] 

More than Nothing: The First Village

[Part of the Party Time journal]

At the edge of the misty forest the Goat Getters encounter a small group of apes who warn them of a war being waged by their kind and the forest floor dwellers of Shroomy, also noting all the goats would be "shroomed" by now. They accept the apes offer of climbing up above the shroom-mist and meet the apes god "QQ", a large rainbow serpent who asks for their assistance in winning the war but since they refuse, QQ just let's them cross the tree tops to the other side of the forest and warns them never to return.

On the other side of the forest the now somewhat hungry tribe find a ruined settlement where they engage with beasts they've never seen before (dinosaurs) and clear them out. Obelisks in the ruins are decorated with pictograms of farming and building which Mama Yapa understands. She declares the time of wandering is over, and the tribe will settle down here to try farm the land. They will be more than nothing.

The young heroes are sent to gather wood and not willing to return to the misty forest, follow a large river the opposite way, encountering a sheep herder looking for his missing dog and a naked fisher person named Testikles whose invitation to visit his nudist village is rejected.

They eventually reach another farming settlement of Twain and the super friendly leader Shania agrees to help the Goat Getters as much as she can. Providing seeds, timber and a cart to transport it as well as information on the area. On the way back the team encounter a naked fisher kid named Poo on the side of the road, crying because his people sacrificed his dad to their god, the Crocagatorman, in accordance to their practice of sacrificing those above a certain age.

Rou takes the kid under her care, renaming him to Winnie instead and returns him to the Goat Getter Village which has suffered an attack while they were away. Mama Yapa says the ostrich riding raiders took some of their people off with them to the West and so the party pursues, detouring slightly when they come across a trio of naked dog worshipers and a pack of various dogs they admit to "freeing from slavery". Ug does an amazing speech that involves letting the dogs decide if they are happier with their owners and the trio agree to return all the stolen dogs while giving directions to the raiders and suggesting they only respect strength. 

As such when they find the raider camp, Jerg approaches alone and challenges their wiry short leader to a duel - and kills him with the Ug's obsidian blade after dodging the thrown javelins and mounted ostrich. The rest of the raiders kneel before Jerg, muttering "you earn what you kill" (thanks Riddick) and so not only do they free the prisoners, the raiders are also assimilated into the Goat Getter tribe!

More than Nothing: The Goat Getters

[Part of the Party Time journal]

Ug (Juris), Rou (Rose), Ma (Mom) and Jerg (DL) are young cavemen out to prove themselves on their first unsupervised goat hunt, armed only with their wits and fists. It's a ritual of the "Goat Getter" tribe (PC named) that has followed this massive herd of goats over the years. 

Having tracked their prey to the foothills of the Black Mountain, Ug accidentally spooks the goats which sends them running. A sabertooth cat takes advantage of this, killing one goat and running off. Somehow the team loses track of the herd but finds the cat tracks and not willing to return empty handed follow them to a lone tree beneath which is the goat carcass.

The sabertooth strikes from hiding, mauling Jerg but Ma kills it by bashing it with a rock and saving him. They take both dead animals back their nomadic camp but on the way find a group of weeping, dark skinned mountain folk who have been brutalized and or killed by something. The hunters decide to go past quietly.

Back at base, tribe leader Mama Yapa is happy with their performance, beating even the veteran hunters who returned bruised, scratched and empty handed. Over dinner under a pitch black night lit only by two stars, Ug overhears the veteran group boasting about their exploits against the mountain tribe.

The next day the four are off hunting again but this time Rou spots a child seemingly made of light high atop a cliff. They go to investigate and the celestial child, "Sunny" asks for their aid in rescuing an ally from his enemy who will not expect the intruders to be more than nothing, and in exchange will lend them his power if they are successful. They agree and are instructed to leap off the cliff onto an invisible bridge. Ug goes first and sure enough he doesn't fall, so the party follows the bridge directly to a tear in the sky, leading to a realm of dark and freezing cold - a large, chained wolf imprisoned beyond icy stalagmites.

They work quickly to free the creature (taking cold damage over time) when a voice commands them to stop. It is the darkness, and it doesn't want Sunny to gain more power than he already has so instead offers to give them a weapon to kill the child instead. Ug tricks the darkness into gifting him obsidian blade (an ever sharp rock) with a false promise of slaying Sunny. They free the wolf, who turns out to be Luna, and exit just in time.

As a reward, Sunny teaches them how to summon his light: to stare directly at the sun and yell "I am bright!". The pair then vanish and since night is fast approaching the young hunters return to base, noticing there is now a moon in the sky. The peace is interrupted in the village when a giant "centipede" made of a mass of congealed corpses arrives and starts killing their tribesmen, by folding them in half and putting their heads in their asses. 

Ug distracts it while Jerg locates the puppeteer mountain tribe caster on a nearby hill, using a dead baby as a hand puppet to control the creature. Jerg kills him with a large stone then tears the baby corpse in two, destroying the monstrous centipede.

Mama Yapa decides to move the survivors off the cursed mountain to pursue the goat herd into the misty forest beyond.

More than Nothing: The System

[Part of the Party Time journal]

It's homebrew time again, and this time around I'm using a simplified Ironsworn system which uses five base stats: Edge for dexterity stuff, Might for strength and fighting stuff, Wits for smart stuff, Heart for will and talking stuff and Shadow for hiding and spotting hidden stuff. Skills go up or down when I deem them to do so. :P

These all start as blank and can go down to -3 and up to +3. When doing a dangerous or interesting action the player will roll 1d6 and 2d10. The d6 result then gets modified based on the number against the relevant stat (plus any extra situational bonuses or negatives) and if that beats both d10s its a success, if it beats one d10 its a partial success with consequences, and if it beats neither d10 its a failure with consequences. Should the d10s have the same number that's a critical (success or failure defined as before).

Characters have 13 boxes for health and stress, health being marked off from the left while stress starts from the right. Health being harder to recover. PCs can spend 2 stress on their own character to reroll all dice, or 1 stress (for themselves or their team mates) to reroll one dice. And they can just keep doing that. If the bar fills up with stress and/or damage then the character is "out" and quite probably dead.

I'm also adding occasional table top warfare here using old toy figurines, with simple rules of you can walk 3" and do something or run 6" and do nothing else. Heroes need to be within 2" of allies to command them (and said allies have to be a chain of 2" or less apart each to move together) and at the end of movement all units have to be facing the same direction (usually, unless it was an intentional "spread out" command). In instances where I have grid maps, its the same with the walk being 3 squares and the run being 6 squares.

Bad guys don't really get to roll in most situations except in the table top warfare bit. There its simply a dice roll (and I determine the situation on how many dice) and the result equals how many soldiers die and/or how much damage goes to a PC. 

Lastly, each character has an option to avoid damage by using limited "plot armor". These are basically a set of flashback questions made from plot threads I couldn't incorporate into the main story that lead us to know more about each character's past, usually shady or dark. It's funny that my group knows what I'm like and try their best to avoid using it at all costs!  

As usual I'll throw in more systems as we go along but those are the basics, and a lot of this is based off the many RPGs I've been reading through. :)

Greenland 2: Migration and Peaky Blinders: The Immortal Man

Two sequel movies with ":"

Greenland 2: Migration

The survivors of Greenland have made it to temporary safety, but that wouldn't make an interesting story so the first thing to do is take that away and get them moving again. Only this time they have to travel much farther, but its ok because most of the deadly things are only deadly when they're mentioned and then forgotten about and the party gets loads of expendable helpers on top of the ridiculous amount of plot armor to get them through the string of roadblocks that basically make up this film. It's a more epic journey, but its somehow a worse movie than last time.

Peaky Blinders: The Immortal Man

The finale to the series sees protagonist Thomas Shelby (Cillian Murphy) having become a recluse and handing over his gang to his gypsy son who is doing his best and succeeding at being an asshole to everyone, all while making some really bad decisions. So bad that his dad has to be awoken from his slumber to come fix everything. 

Everything considered the plot is actually quite small scale and would really only appeal to people who have watched the series. If you were a fan then yes, this is for you, complete with cool non-era music and shots of just "looking cool". 

Hounds of War and A House of Dynamite

Two movies that should be exciting but aren't.

Hounds of War

After a group of mercs are setup on a doomed mission, the lone survivor seeks violent revenge on those responsible. You could do many things with that generic plot line, but this movie decides to make the protagonist only involved with a third of the action - delegating somewhat important tasks to nearly nameless side characters. It also feels like they did a lot of work for very little / indirect payoff and that combined with the terrible editing of putting cuts everywhere in the action sequences just really makes it bad. Not recommended. 

A House of Dynamite

When an ICBM bound for the USA is detected, everyone starts to panic as plans fail and hard decisions have to be made. Only they don't really - because while this movie might have good actors and an interesting hook, it lacks content and makes up for it by showing different viewpoints on the same overlapping number of minutes. Conversations you've already heard are spoken again, and really things you know and don't know remain the same throughout. Don't expect any resolutions here. Not recommended. 

Arknights: Endfield

Set in a universe of anime style characters who have spaceships but still use swords and spears, this free to play single player game (currently on Epic Games) features some nice graphics, decent voice acting and a click fest of combat that rewards timing.

Not only do you have to balance your team of four from a roster of operators (most of whom are possibly teenage girls) who will each individually require leveling, gearing, leveling the gear, and such - you also have to get lucky to recruit them from the gachapon style lucky draw that you earn every so often.

You can see more characters in the trailer.

Base building is also a pretty big component of this game (which caught me by surprise). Sure, you can hit minerals and gather bushes to craft stuff. But you can also setup auto mining rigs, processing plants, fabricator factories, conveyor belts between said parts to move materials around and electrical generators and have to run electrical cables to each of these for them to activate. Cable not long enough? Build a relay to keep it going! 

You can easily spend sessions not fighting at all but just harvesting, expanding and such. Oh, and you also build outposts that you can assign one of your team to manage, that can then trade and grow on its own too. There's also a stock market where you can buy goods and hope that you can sell for higher, because this "single player" game still takes into consideration what other players are doing. And if that isn't enough you can then fix up and build out your space ship. :O

Yes, there's A LOT going on here with tutorials galore in the form of simulations, including the base building part. Cool game but ultimately just too much for me, and you can almost taste the grinding as you need loads of things to level up your people, build your base and the like.

Of almost forgot one more negative: every single enemy, regardless of your level, feels like an HP sponge. Not sure if that's intentional but it certainly is annoying! 

Zootopia (1 and 2)

Disney doing something right!

These animated flicks where everyone is an anthropomorphic animal takes place in Zootopia, where predators and prey live in peace and "anyone can be anything". That doesn't mean it will be easy though as learned by protagonist bunny cop Judy Hopps who takes in on herself to take on a missing persons case and discover why some predators are going feral. 

Zootopia 2 continues the story of our heroes and does more world building with another case, and while its still a good watch it isn't as strong as the first one.

Regardless, both have good CGI, a well written plot, cute and likeable characters, and many funny moments to boot! Disney is doing very well with these. Highly recommended!

Cozy Grove and Clone Drone in the Danger Zone

Two games starting with C that get old quick.

Cozy Grove

This game has you play as a spirit scout sent alone to a small island that is haunted by spirits! But no, it's not a horror. The silly bear spirits all need help and its pretty cool that as you do help them remember who they are which adds more color to their section of the island, and expands the island to unlock more spirits to help. It's got easy controls and cute graphics but THE WORST collect and deliver quest system I've seen. You'll need to scrounge the place to find things that only SEQUENTIALLY SPAWN. Need three branches? You need to find the first one somewhere before the second one EVEN SPAWNS. That's just absolute shit and a complete waste of time. Not recommended.

Clone Drone in the Danger Zone

This voxel arena battler has you fighting robots using swords and bows with the main catch being that all weapons are vorpal - any piece hit of you or your enemies is easily chopped! You also get to upgrade after each match but one death and you get to start from the beginning again. The robot commentators are intentionally annoying and occasionally funny but the repetitiveness of the actual play isn't great.

Hyper Echelon and Haven Dock

Two games starting with "H" that aren't great. 

Hyper Echelon

Despite the name and the obvious attempt to show "hey, you can customize your space ship!" in the tutorial, this pixel game is just another top down, bullet hell space ship shooting the bad guys and/or obstacles while the background scrolls from the top of the screen to the bottom at a steady and fixed pace. Oh, then you can redo the same missions at harder difficulties to get medals. Yay? Hard pass.

Haven Dock

This base building game has you stranded on a small island but don't worry, by somehow collecting the absolute truck fulls of garbage that float by you can magically create (using stone tools according to the voice over) wooden platforms to establish a base, build equipment to pump and filter sea water, make farms, etc. What kills it for me is you often have to wait for materials you need to drift by close enough for collection. Not a lot you can do to mitigate that and "having to wait to have fun" is always garbage design. Not recommended. 

The Bluff and The Rip

Two decent movies!

The Bluff

In this swashbuckling tale, a band of pirates raid a small island village that happens to have a fishwife with a violent past (played by Priyanka Chopra). While the story is predictable and some of the younger actors aren't great, the action pieces are pretty good with Priyanka really getting into it. All up decent enough flick for those that like fighting and pirates.

The Rip

In this thriller, a police squad (whose leader is played by Matt Damon) suffering from loss of a team mate and low wages, raid a stash house where they find a huge amount of cash and start to turn on each other if they should keep some of the find for themselves. Good acting, a good story, and an excellent use of tension makes this an easy one to recommend. I really enjoyed it!

Turnip Boy Robs a Bank and TOMAK: Save the Earth Regeneration

Two repetitive games starting with "T".

Turnip Boy Robs a Bank

The follow up to "Turnip Boy commits Tax Evasion" continues the story of the cute veggie people, and Turnip Boy has now signed up with a band of crooks to rob a bank. Over and over (yes the same bank)! How it plays is that in the bank you've got to fight off the guards, shake down the civilians, collect loot and... help NPCs in the bank do mundane things? All in 3 minutes. After that the veggie cops show up and you need to get back to the getaway van and back to the hideout where you can spend your stolen cash on the dark web to upgrade things... and then go back into the bank to do it all again. It's very strange and you'll quickly get that feeling of doing the same thing over and over while expecting a different result...

TOMAK: Save the Earth Regeneration

Do you like Tamagotchi games? The ones where you have to care for, feed and nourish your pet friend? This is just like that, except your friend is a female head growing out of a flower pot that you need to care for and you have a time limit to prove to the gods that love exists by doing so (or the Earth is destroyed). Sure, it's strange - but what lets it down is the usual repetitive boringness of Tamagotchi games. Not recommended.

Friday Night Survival

Has it really been a whole year since I posted about our Friday night game sessions? It's a case of out with the old and in with the new: we finished 40K: Martyr, got tired of the long loads of 40K: Space Marine 2 and got a bit tired out with Helldivers 2, which has a pretty good run!

We did try Elden Ring: Nightreign where and beat the first tri-wolf boss (and I soloed the sleepy flying ooze) but it runs too poorly on DL's machine so that's been put on the back burner for now. 

Mechwarrior 5: Clans has pulled majority of the time for us with good gameplay and an interesting story on top of the usual optional customization of everyone's mechs. We've won it now, including the Ghost Bear and Tukayid DLC expansions because it was that much fun! Definitely recommended for co-op sessions, but solo might feel a bit grindy and long.

We've also sailed on Void Crew which is a pretty neat "fly your customized spaceship through an array of roguelike challenges that include enemy ships and multiple space walks into space ruins for salvage". It's also a bit repetitive and I think there are only three bosses currently but we might go back into that in a bit. It's lack of story lets it down.

Green Hell is what we're hitting hard at the moment. Nice graphics, easy enough controls, and a story to boot have sucked us into this jungle survival game that includes hostile natives, deadly jaguars, and cool lessons on why not to drink untreated river water. It's not a style in our usual wheelhouse, but its very fun so far. Again though, seems it would be a drag in single player but three person co-op is just fun. For a tiny sized game it's got a pretty big map, so lets see how long it keeps us lost in the jungle!

Update: Green Hell's Spirit of Amazonia gives more of the same... just way too much more because the grind added to it is insane and not something I recommend at all. 

Keep the Heroes Out!

This cooperative board game has players each taking control of one group of dungeon denizens (all of whom are cute) as they try to do what the title says: keep the heroes out! Especially from the treasure room, because if they loot the treasure, the game is lost! This is a campaign style game, so the dungeon tiles are arranged based on the scenario you are attempting (20 provided). 

On your turn you have five cards in front of you from your own deck which you can then use to command your things around. Move, attack or action which means use the room's special action like get a gold coin from the treasury or use your group's special power. The mercenary gnolls can attack more, the imps can just pull traps out of their butts, the singular dragon can regenerate HP and the ratkins can spawn more ratkins as an example.

After that, you pull hero cards which determines who spawns where. Each hero type has one special power that only applies when they first appear, afterwards they all behave the same which keeps it simple. Rogues disarm a trap where they spawn. Warriors destroy resources. Archers shoot towards the treasure room. Wizards wake up people in the prison. What? Prison!? Yes, on your turn you can "push your luck" and draw three more cards for the low cost of putting a "tired" hero in prison. Unless you pull a wizard in which case, they all wake up!

Managing tired heroes is all part of the game. After the special spawn move any active hero will first try "wake up" all tired heroes who then all get to do stuff! This will be try kill a monster on their tile or try open a chest on their tile. If they do any of those they get "tired" and are basically dormant until another hero (or special effect) wakes them up. Active heroes with nothing to do all advance to the next tile leading towards the treasure room and repeat this process.This can cause a hero cascade if you have too many dotted around the place which is dangerous. At the same time, the only way to win is to go through the ENTIRE hero deck 2-3 times (depending on your difficulty level).   

It's a pretty fun game, though you might only have a few turns depending on the player count and not all the monsters are equal, both in complexity and usefulness. 

Styx: Master of Shadows and Styx: Shards of Darkness

Being a sneaky rakash is fun!

It's been awhile since I've played a great stealth game and both these Styx games definitely fall into this category. In it you play the titular goblin who is agile, quiet, and has an assortment of skills to deal with the many foes. The main one being that you can barf out a clone of yourself!? Yeah. That's actually a main one in the first game - Master of Shadows - that ties closely to the really cool story.

Having a good story and a funny, sarcastic protagonist ticks a lot of boxes actually. But having maps that you can approach in a multitude of ways is even better. If you want to play non-lethal, you can. If you want to play complete non-detection, you can. If you want to murder everyone, you can... almost. That last one might be tricky as there are people harder to kill than others, but patience, luring and handy environmental stuff can defeat even the most armored enemies. It's a little easier in Shards of Darkness that lets you craft some nasty things and unlock skill trees that can bypass some defenses.

"I see you..."

Usually though you want to remain hidden as many enemies can insta-kill you (and on the hardest "goblin" mode, all of them can insta-kill you), and even those that don't slay you out right have a decent chance of taking you out if your parry timing isn't good and/or there's more than two of them. Sure melee combat might feel a bit rough but I think that's intentional. All up these two are super fun for those who enjoy the sneaky thief type games. Highly recommended!

War Machine (2026) and Avatar: Fire and Ash

Two movies that feel like other movies you've already seen.

War Machine

Alan Ritchson plays a soldier with a scarred past trying out to be an elite Ranger and as part of their testing they have a simulated exercise to destroy a downed aircraft. With navigation on the fritz they try explode the wrong one, which happens to be a mechanized alien invader(!) and the main chunk of this flick actually plays like the original Predator (I'm showing my age huh), but without hiding the enemy in darkness. The top notch effects and having a more fleshed out protagonist does make it worth the watch though, and its nice that it's a complete story with a myriad of possible continuations. Thumbs up. 

Avatar: Fire and Ash 

The big blue cat family led by Jake (Sam Worthington) is back, and this time they're trying to get rid of their fostered human kid (what with the air being poisonous and all) when they're ambushed by new bandit enemies and previous foes now also in new bodies. Huh? They just can't let death stick can they? Again the action pieces keep it entertaining, but we're three movies in and it feels like the best plot points only had minor advancement while the rest keep spinning the same wheels. Like me, you might wonder if you just watched the same movie a third time... 

Rustler and Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night

Two games inspired by other games.

Rustler

This game tries its hardest to be GTA but set in medieval times (though this includes medieval graffiti,  beat boxing bards you can hire to ride along with you so that you can have some tunes, and guardsman knights whose horses are equipped with red and blue sirens). You can get the gist from its live action intro. :P

You play as the titular Rustler who is out to make some gold by doing illegal things, the least of which is stealing horses actually! I like that horses also have various "makes" (like the cars) and that you can re-color your ride through the paint station. Alas its somewhat repetitive, and the fixed top down view doesn't really do it for me, so it doesn't get a recommendation from me. 

Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night

This side scrolling platform game is basically Castlevania, except your protagonist is now a sexy shard caster named Miriam who has trouble jumping to places unless she wears kung fu shoes and does the correct sequence of moves to "air walk". Her proficiency in the many weapons available does somewhat depend on player skill and knowing the combos that you learn from library shelves, while her stats improve not only from the gear you wear (and craft) but also from the first time you eat any cooked dish so expect to be ingredient hunting a fair bit! 

There's a bit of a grind and more than a little back and forth through respawning enemies but what irritated me most is that you lose any unsaved progress between save points and there are no real hints of where said save points are meaning you might be doing pretty good until you get locked into a non-telegraphed boss room and if you die - hope you have fun replaying that whole segment again. I didn't.