Darkest Dungeon: The Tragic Extent

Reports from Darkest Dungeon - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

My concerns of any leadership challenges have been abated this week with the death of Lenigrast. He was laid low by a small pig man named Wilbur who everyone assumed he had previously slain. They could not recover his body, no doubt he is now food for those hideous creatures. God rest his soul. We also lost Bill and the spy Mina Petrova who fell (or rather, had crushing debris fall on them) while hunting a fulminating prophet in the ruins.

They're always filled with disgusting bile.

Fortunately their allies Hunter O'Harrah and Don Pez managed to find victory thanks to their sacrifice. They then had a much better run when hunting another hag in the weald with Alpha, a soldier from another time, and the cats Alvinia and Shalquoir. Apparently the old crone was no match for them at all.

Soon after Lenigrast was avenged by Melisandre, Don Pez, Ian and Da Qiao, a young vestal who can't be older than her teens. Despite Ian getting hacked in two, they defeated the Swine King in the warrens, and Wilbur as well - though after the battle they claim the little pig was nowhere to be found. I have a feeling this isn't the last we've seen of him. Da Qiao also accompanied the barbarian Zhurong, Techno Viking and the shaman Katunga to slay an Unstable Flesh afterwards. This girl shows much promise.

-Abbess Feeva

Darkest Dungeon: Slowly, Softly

Reports from Darkest Dungeon - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

Fawadin is dead, having taken an octocestus to the face. There was some dispute if the loud, ex-blacksmith Lenigrast would be taking the reigns but as of now I am in charge and have appointed my battle sisters Catharina and Elizabeth (who disguises herself well, for a mushroom) as my proxies to handle any unrest.

My old ally Vengarl also is no longer among us. He and the hellion Nerelia were taken by mutated fungus men in the Weald. This was right after he, Don Pez, Bill and Hunter O'Harrah destroyed the shapeshifting incholate flesh in the warrens. Also lost are Ingward and Thanaros, having been devoured by a monstrous shambler that Blunder Buss inadvertently summoned while putting a torch too close to a strange red orb in the ruins.

"Surprised!" is an understatement!

We had other victories too, as Catharina, Lenigrast and Mogg destroyed a brigand 8 pounder cannon in the forest as well as another undead sunken crew at the cove. The bounty hunter Redbeard as well as Alvinia and Shalquoir (who I am told are magical cats) assisted in these endeavors. Slowly but surely we are cleansing this land of all evils lurking within.

-Abbess Feeva

Darkest Dungeon: A Call for Election

Reports from Darkest Dungeon - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

Yo, like Lenigrast was the man this week. He didn't take no shiiz from Fawadin and went out there and kicked some serious ass! It was him, me, Sunbro Forever and Sellsword Luet that went to the pig crib and put a cap in that swine prince POS and that midget piglet Wilbur. People say that dude's always been some king's assistant, but now he's back in bacon form. I know right!?

Anywayz after that Leni goes with Myria, Ser Sad, and the big guy - Gough into the Weald right and put down that ugly mama the wizened hag. Yeah, too bad that witch cooked up Ser Sad in her soup pot before they could ice her but its still one less ugly out there for us to worry about.

That's a crappy way to go.

Leni - my man, you should be the leader - not this Fawadin fool!

-MoGG

Darkest Dungeon: Scribe Duty

Reports from Darkest Dungeon - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

I hate this place, and I hate Fawadin for making me write this stupid report. The bastard didn't even let me recover my daughter's body for burial! When this is over he and I are going to have to sort things out. Not that we're close to that happening any time soon.

Our glorious leader has began expanding operations to the Warrens, Weald and Cove stretching out our numbers and hoping that the more veteran members would keep the recruits safe. Yeah, right. Caes was run through by the lance of a Hulking Swineotour and Plushie Mostly was devoured in her sleep by a corpse eater worm. Boro was also shanked by a bandit, Rosibeth triggered her last trap, and Eurion was squashed by a piece of falling ruin.

Given the state of the ruin, it's surprising this is such a rare occurrence.

The only good news is that the so-called prophet hiding in the ruins has been dealt with by Ser Sad, MoGG, Catharina and Hawkeye Gough. I am going to insist that I go out with the next group. I can't stay cooped up here forever... no one can. I guess that's why the caretaker is as mad he is.

-Lenigrast

Darkest Dungeon: Lowly Apprentices

Reports from Darkest Dungeon - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

While we lost Tark and LeDore to the stressful darkness, I managed to lead a team composed of the bounty hunter Redbeard, Caes the plague doctor and the healer Plushie Mostly to victory - slaying the necromancer in the ruins, even destroying a horrid skull collector that was defending him. Alas this servant of darkness was only an apprentice, which meant his master would be further within.

It reanimates the severed heads of its many victims.

His death seemed to make the cultists more aggressive though, as they were responsible for the deaths of Cheshire Charr, Marcoh78, and Turms. We also lost Chloanne to a brigand cutthroat. Her father Lenigrast, is filled with unconsolable rage. To that end I am forcing him to be on scribe duty until he cools down. No point risking anyone else's life for his mistakes.

As a personal note, I am definitely leagues better than the rest of these so called adventurers and will no longer deign to attempt the easier dungeon runs. Instead I'll let the newbies prove their worth there and see which of them is skilled enough to join the elite (me).

-Fawadin

Dark Souls II: Weakness: Woman therefore try rear

Tales from Dark Souls - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

Are you this game's Solaire?

Player messages never fail to amuse.

My forays into the fortress don't go too well, though on a lower floor I meet Lucatiel, a lady wearing a bearded mask. She is impressed that I still want to talk to her even though she's actively trying to get people to stay away. I also find an anti-poison ring near her which is handy, but the local sorceress guards are simply too much for me so I withdraw back to Majula. Interestingly, Chloanne is here too now - and it turns out she is blacksmith Lenigrast's missing daughter.

Taking another path from town leads me to a small jail house where I meet the warrior, Benhart of Jugo. Apparently he can't advance since the lever is stuck. Stuck because a person got turned to stone right in front of it. There have been a few petrified people around, and it requires a special item to release them. Since I had one I freed the woman, who introduced herself as Rosibeth - apprentice mage to the great Carhillion. Can't be that great if he couldn't unpetrify his own student. That and/or he's a dick.

After giving her some better rags I send her off to Majula and pull the lever which opens ALL the jail doors. Zombie swarm! Yeah, that didn't go well for me. Much better on the second attempt. Beyond the jail was a crossroad with two paths leading to locked doors and one into a misty forest of cheaters. Cheaters who have the same color as the fog. My best defense? No defense! Just sprinting!

I can't see them, but they sure can see me!

Dark Souls II: Eagle Knight Surprise

Tales from Dark Souls - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

With my trusty broadsword in hand I set out on my adventure, following a stone corridor which led out into a great forest ruin. A strange albino hiclops (cyclops/hippopotamus hybrid) patrolled the river and didn't really pay attention to me, but all the hollow soldiers certainly did. They have a new trick now "play dead", which catches me by surprise more than once.

Surprise!

Still, I do pretty well and reach another bonfire - this one home to a merchant hag. Probably the same merchant hag from Undead Berg? She happens to have the key for the blacksmith's shop so I buy that before moving on. The area around her is quite tough though, with "heavy" ninja turtle soldiers.  I am also jumped by an eagle riding knight while exploring who slaughters me with ease. Good thing that bonfire is nearby!

Son of a...

In some nearby mines I also find Cale the Cartographer, who seems to be losing his marbles. He does admit to be squatting in one of the larger mansions in Majula though, and gives me a key so I can visit! I decide to do just that, seeing as the Lord Vessel's power of bonfire teleportation is still available to me. I warp back to Majula, slay a stray skeleton in Cale's mansion, and unlock the blacksmith's shop for him. Awesome! Now there's more stuff on sale that I can't afford to buy.

Dark Souls II: The New Hub

Tales from Dark Souls - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

Having escaped the asylum a second time, I ventured in another direction this time in hopes of getting rid of this Darksign (cursed mark of the undead). I traveled for miles... losing all my gear and quite possibly most of my sanity as I willingly jumped into a whirlpool of certain death. Only I didn't die, instead I found myself transported to some odd cave and in a nearby tree met a small group of wrinkly old women laughing at how doomed I was.

What's wrong with my face!?

They were retired fire keepers, and they asked if I could even remember who I was. My name was no problem, my profession? I think I was a knight! They laughed, gave me a human effigy to help me resist hollowing, and sent me on my way like "all the others" that had been drawn here. Past a small "tutorial section" I found the small cliff side village of Majula, home to the meek armorer Maughlin, Shalquoir the talking cat, and the blacksmith Lenigrast who misplaces things (like the key to his smithy, his daughter, etc). Up near a shrine of world deaths is a broken warrior. Ser Sad is that you?

To be fair that IS pretty depressing. :P

At least he gives handy tips for newbies, and also offers that I join the Covenant - Way of the Blue. Basically the newbie guild whose members enjoy the protection of "the Blue Sentinels". Sure, why not. The last person here is "the Emerald Herald", who handles all leveling up tasks and the (re)powering of my Estus flask. She instructs me to seek the four great souls to begin my quest. Someone really likes the number four in this game series.