Metro 2033 Redux

If it's hostile, you kill it.

Since I was sad that Stalker 2 got cancelled, I decided to play this retelling of Metro 2033 - a first person stealth shooter that mostly takes place in the claustrophobic underground of the titular Metro, which is where humans now try to coexist along with the horrors in the dark to escape the nuclear wasteland on the surface.

Russians love exploding things.

While it's mainly a railroaded experience (it is the Metro after all) there are opportunities to explore in many levels and this really sets the bar in world building as you travel from station to station. Unless you pick the "action mode", you will also likely be low on ammo for most of it - especially since the military grade bullets are what is used as currency, a system I really enjoyed. Obviously stealth is my jam, so I also loved trying to sneak around everything.

That said, fighting works just fine though your guns will feel weak towards the end if you aren't using the "good" currency ammo. Also I really appreciate that they took the time to make monsters actually behave differently. Big things charge and pounce, little bastards nip and run, spider bugs can be fended off with light, and the gorilla type librarians can actually just be stared down to convince them to leave (aim at their face). All excellent design decisions which make for an excellent game. It is no wonder that it was followed up by Metro: Last Light and Metro Exodus. Highly recommended!

Surviving Armageddon: The Midnight Sky of Metro Exodus

Because there has to be something after...

The Midnight Sky

It's the end of the world.

Left alone on an Arctic science base while the rest of the planet dies, a terminally ill man (played by George Clooney, who also directs this film) makes it his mission to try contact any space mission in range to warn them of the danger of returning to the irradiated surface.

A nice cup of depression.

This sci-fi flick has some gorgeous cinematography, nice effects, decent acting, and a decent plot and for something we randomly picked on Netflix to watch, it was rather good. Not amazing, but certainly better than George Clooney's other space flick, Gravity. I give The Midnight Sky three peas out of five. A decent watch if you have no expectations.

Metro Exodus

Everything is a lie.

This third Metro game sees Artyom finally leave the mutant filled tunnels in search of the truth on the mutant filled surface! Apparently there are lots of crazies out here too and you get to meet many of them on this journey which can be as blood filled or bloodless as you decide - the latter heavily relying on stealth.

All the spider levels are great nightmare fuel!

Though dangerous, the large open air maps certainly encourage exploration which goes well with the new crafting component to the game that lets you modify base weapons into a variety of firearms. Indeed, the only thing I miss from the previous games are the dark ones (who really ran off at the end of Last Light anyway) and the absurd bullets as cash mechanic which was fantastic.

Definitely worth a play and one I highly recommend. I give it four spiders out of five.

Insight: Load games early as the checkpoint mechanic will easily over take you.

Bio Menace Stargunner Jill

Well, that sounds like a wacky and possibly adult Japanese movie.

Bio Menace

Die, battle toad!

When mutants invade Metro City (hmm, aren't there always mutants in Metro?), the CIA sends their top operative Naked Snake to recon kill them all. As a 2D action scroller, Snake must blast his way through the teeming mutant horde to also rescue survivors and find keys to doors to score points and advance to the next level... where he needs to do it all again only against stronger enemies! While the controls are decent enough there are simply too many annoyance factors in this game for me - all of which are present in stage 1. Stupid looking enemies? Check. Helpless while climbing ladders? Check. Keys hidden to force backtracking? Check. Dying restarts level? Check. Definitely not one for me - I give it 1 plane crash you can walk behind out of 5. Not worth playing.

Insight: Jumping up ladders is much faster than the regular "climb" action.

Stargunner

Ugh, who designed this ship? Oh right, I did.

Much like Biomenace, this 2D space shooter was also made by Apogee in which you must destroy some aliens, preferably all of them! Starting with a Star Wars type scrolling intro is usually a bad sign, and the game doesn't improve much from there as it becomes a stock standard spaceship bullet hell type fare. I do quite like the ship customization ability in between missions, but not being able to flip around to use the cannon you put on the bottom of your vessel and make it shoot up, even temporarily, is just stupid. Sorry, another one not worth playing. It gets 1 random voice over out of 5. If you want a similar old school game try Tyrian 2000 instead.

Jill of the Jungle

Pacman would like his ghosts back.

This three game series has players platforming around as the titular Jill, who moves with all the grace of an ox and can't throw daggers below waist height. The graphics are somewhat/really bad, the controls clunky, and the story near non-existent. While the sound effects choices are also questionable the music on some levels is really good - which is a welcome surprise!  Also, because most of the levels are short and dying still achieves progress (at least in the early maps) this actually turned out to be a fun distraction! Unfortunately it did start getting repetitive later on but still not bad given its age. It certainly did better than the two above! I give it 1.5 sexy pixels out of 5.

Insight: Don't bother jumping if you are in climb mode. Just use the direction buttons.

The Darkest Hour

If you can survive the slow start you might enjoy the rest of the film.

Without exaggeration this film has one of the slowest and most mundane first 15-20 minutes I've seen. As nice as Moscow is there is simply nothing important happening. NOTHING. It actually reached the stage where I was loudly proclaiming that "someone better die soon or I'm ending the movie".

Faraday Cat is not impressed.

Fortunately at that stage, aliens invade and LOTS of people die! YAY! Seriously, you can skip to the part where the lights fall from the sky and treat that as the start. Not sure why they felt the need for adding that horrendous non-eventful crap before hand. Anywho, the story then focuses on a small group of people who are trying to survive this invasion - which actually makes for an interesting movie.

The best aspect for me is the aliens themselves. They are unique and CGI saving (you'll understand when you see them). I also like that while dangerous, they do have their share of weaknesses. Perhaps most importantly they don't suffer from a "mother ship" or "one boss" symptom. It almost sets the stage for a FPS game actually, one I'd enjoy playing. I also wish that the Metro segment was a bit longer but I imagine that would just be all action and expense for the special FX department and no substance to the story.

All up I give this film three flickering light bulbs out of five, and surprisingly would like to watch it again! Though, I'd probably busy myself with making popcorn / preparing snacks or something during the incredibly dull opening if I wasn't allowed to skip it.

Metro: Last Light Redux

I guess being a full fledged Ranger makes this game less scary than its predecessor.

This is the continuing journey from where Metro 2033 left off where we once again play as Artyom in the dark, mutant infested tunnels of the Metro. I quite like the story here, as we learn a lot more about our protagonist and the "dark ones" (the main antagonists of the first game). I also very much like the Stealth mechanic too, though those throwing knives seem to be overpowered since the last game (guess Artyom did a lot of pushups during the time gap). Also cool is that people that don't like it can choose a different setting right at the start for a more Actiony experience. I can't comment on that because I obviously didn't pick it.

If going via stealth, don't stand in the light like this dunce.

The graphics are again top notch and both the claustrophobic, poorly lit tunnels and the often misty radioactive surface, which you visit a lot more in this game, are detailed very nicely. New critters are also equal parts cool and scary, especially those light-hating spiders but as I alluded to at the start, if you have played the first Metro, nothing here will really scare you.

The only two things I didn't like about the game are the "checkpoint mechanic" which can happen to save your game just as your air filter is almost empty and you are low on health, and the "view for voice" mechanic where you must actively turn to look at whoever is speaking to get the loudest volume. Maybe Artyom has something wrong with his ears from all that gunfire and grenade blasts in enclosed spaces? Whatever the case, I give this four and a half bullets out of five and recommend it to people that liked the first game, the Thief series, and to those that like shooters in general.