The Beekeeper and Jurassic World Rebirth

A pair of action movies with a healthy dose of plot armor.

The Beekeeper

When the kind landlady of a quiet beekeeper (played by Jason Statham) becomes the victim of cyber crime, said beekeeper goes on a murderous rampage of revenge. It helps that he's also ex-spec ops and loaded to the brim with plot armor. While the story is very similar to his other film, A Working Man, this one is better plot wise. Thumbs up!

Jurassic World Rebirth

Even in the universe of Jurassic World the resurrected dinosaurs are now old, boring news and as the modern climate is actually fatal to them the remaining dinos only exist near the equator on islands mandated that no human should ever go to. Of course, greedy scientists hire a team of equally greedy mercenaries (one of whom is played by Scarlett Johansson) to do just that... and for some stupid reason the script writers just had to inject a family with children as well to fill a tick box in the plot sheet. It's an ok and very pretty movie, but it would have been better if it was just mercs vs the dinos - and if they could just go weapons free instead of treating them like poor puppy dogs like they do each movie.  

Beyond Blue and Jurassic World Evolution 2

Where wild life is the focus.

Beyond Blue

This is an exploration game where you play a diver swimming around and scanning ocean wild life. The controls are easy and its a pretty good looking game but there's no danger to be found here, just story. I think I might have preferred if the game been one big map with plenty to see and scan (ala Skyrim) rather than the medium sized swim zones per level, separated by bits of "down time" on your small sub where you do things like make phone calls. Not a game for me.

Jurassic World Evolution 2

I didn't like the first one of these so it's no surprise I don't like this sequel which retains the sim-zoo feel. Dinos are on the loose and like pokemon you need to catch em all and imprison them in specifically determined man made zones. They retained the semi first person helicopter / chopper shooting part (tranqs only) which is cool, but I drew the line at having to make the first dinosaur 95% content. I'd much prefer to slay the dragons than trap them, but that's not the target audience for this game.

Jurassic World: Dominion, 65, and Second Extinction

All about the dinos!

Jurassic World: Dominion

Thanks to the events of the last movie, dinosaurs now co-inhabit the Earth with humans and somehow that's not a violent thing? I mean, can you imagine the size of the shits being left around? Somehow they manage to make this not about the dinos at all yet at the same time get all the protagonists of the franchise together. While I'm not super impressed with the plot the CGI is quite good and its enjoyable enough. Still not sure why people don't just shoot the dinos though - at least even in self defense!

65

Millions of years ago an alien space craft crashes on Earth and said alien (played by a very human looking Adam Driver), must survive the horrors of dinosaur-times but he isn't shy to absolutely annihilate those reptiles with future tech which is great! The only problem is that it makes for an incredibly light story. Not recommended. Maybe that's a clue why Dominion didn't go that way. Guns curb stomp dinos to the point that its boring.

Second Extincion (Early Access)

In this up to three player coop shooter, dinos have fully taken over the Earth and humanity had to flee to space. Now they send teams down to try retake the planet with missions like  "lets steal some T-Rex eggs for science (and breakfast)"? With tech that literally takes you in and out of space its a bit strange that you need to be boots on the ground to fight the endlessly spawning dinos (who never fight each other). It's also ridiculous to see giant monsters be so... acrobatic? That coupled with a class being tied to one of their six woke characters kinda kills it for me. They should have uncoupled that at least like how Aliens: Fireteam Elite did. Not recommended.

Jurassic World 2: Fallen Kingdom

Humanity takes another step towards extinction.

After the events of Jurassic World, the now defunct and abandoned dinosaur theme park faces near total extinction thanks to the active volcano on the small island which is perhaps the best outcome for everyone involved.

Alas, thanks to human greed and misplaced animal rights activism (our heroes!) a bunch of people, including a few characters from the first movie, set out to save them... by bringing them to the mainland because nothing could go wrong!

Spoiler: Everything goes wrong.

While the action bits and CGI are all up to par here, the level of stupid in the plot is just too high for me to enjoy. It's also a problem when your heroes (apart from Starlord) are unlikable. I say this is a step down from the last outing and am not keen on watching it again. I give it 2.5 ships full of dino turd out of 5.

Jurassic World

Proving that people are stupid.

After the disastrous events from the previous dinosaur theme park, a wealthy moron has decided to rebuild not just the park itself but all the attractions - and more! You see people apparently got bored of regular dinosaurs so now they make "new" ones through gene-splicing, often sponsored by big name companies. I had a chuckle at the mention Pepsi-saurus.

As we learned in the Flight of Dragons, reptiles can be reasoned with. :P

Obviously things get loose, people get eaten, and some silly kids continually cause their absent minded carers some heart attacks. To its credit, the CGI is great and everything looks really cool. Also the action pieces, of which there are many, are quite entertaining to watch. There are also lots of throwbacks to the first movie but most were lost on me as it has been way too long since I've last seen it.

Alas, since most of the characters (other than Starlord) are unlikable and due to the dinosaur sized plot holes throughout the movie (where seriously, one phone call could have averted the entire plot [spoiler link]) I can only give this three raptors out of five. Still enough entertainment to provide at least one watch, and I wouldn't mind watching it again. :)