State of Play: USA aligns with Russia?

It's now day 1103 of the Russia's two day special operation in Ukraine. While the battle rages on there it seems Russia is making some gains outside that theater, seemingly with the help of relatively newly re-elected USA president Donald Trump. In just around two months of his second time in office the USA has held "Peace Talks" with Russia without Ukrainian participation and decided to halt aid going to Ukraine after President Trump publicly clashed with Ukrainian president Zelenskyy at the Oval Office.

On top of this his high tariffs on Canada, Mexico (he also renamed their gulf) and China as well as sanctions relief for Russia some speculate he's building "the bridge" to trade primarily with the Russians in the future. This has sparked more than a few interesting comments of "Trump is a Russian agent" and "Congrats to Russia on winning the cold war". I suppose we will see if and how this changes the battle field but one thing's for sure: Putin must be pretty happy right now.

The Marksman and Officer Black Belt

Dealing with criminals in their own way.

The Marksman

A veteran soldier and failing farmer (played by Liam Neeson) at the Mexican border comes across a mother and son illegally crossing the fence as they are pursued by a Mexican cartel who want them back. Our protagonist is torn between deporting them or helping them, and annoyingly this continues throughout the majority of the movie. Being on the fence so much is not a great quality, and with excess scenes and low on screen body count it doesn't really make for a great movie. Skip.

Officer Black Belt

A natural athlete and martial artist (played by Kim Woo-bin) is recruited into the South Korean probation officer task force where they must monitor and handle aggressive probation violators with non-lethal close quarter combat. It is a decent action comedy, with decidedly more action than comedy (especially with the bad guys, as they are freaking dark), and a pretty good story which only gets sloppy at the end. Better that I thought it would be. Recommended!

Kaleidoscope and The Black Demon

Shows where people screw themselves? Lol.

Kaleidoscope

In this one season heist series stars Giancarlo Esposito as the mastermind who needs to assemble a team of crooks to rob a vault for a massive payday. Nice sets, good acting and interesting characters make this an interesting watch but then someone decided to make a gimmick where the episodes are all out of order, with some taking place after the heist despite the last episode being the heist. While we enjoyed it, we probably would have enjoyed it more if it was simply put in chronological order.

The Black Demon

In this horror(? more like unintentional comedy) movie, a magical megalodon terrorizes an offshore oil platform and all the fools silly enough to go near it. Yes, this is not your usual big CGI shark movie. For one it can make you trip balls with psychic attacks before eating you and two the kill count is pretty low as the movie tries its best to -not- use the shark as much as possible. Instead we have our protagonists, who are a handful of annoying characters, and the extras who all speak Spanish. This is fine if you speak Spanish but if you don't then don't count on this movie having any translation services for you (at least if you watch it on Amazon Prime).

I turned on the English subtitles (the only option) and got [speaks Spanish], [asks question in Spanish], [answers in Spanish], [laughs in Spanish]. Yeah, I made the last one up but there's a LOT of untranslated Spanish here. Anyway, this is a very silly movie and one I don't recommend.

Guacamelee and Grime

GG... or are they?

Guacamelee! Super Turbo Championship Edition and Guacamelee! 2

This Mexican themed action platformer has the player take role of a regular Jose who becomes a mighty luchador to take on the forces of lucha-evil, which are primarily skeletons it seems. I appreciate the good comic style art and a decent sense of humor but the combat is either a bit off, or it didn't gel well with me which is quite possibly because "this game recommends a controller".

Sigh. Why do I bother trying these on my PC? As such the platforming sections (still in the tutorial) were already not do-able for me. Guacamelee 2 humorously starts with what I believe is the final fight of the first game, but this one has some pretty bad stuttering effects where everything freezes for a few seconds a few times a minute. That's just unplayable.

Grime

In this side scrolling platform adventure which smells heavily of the Dark Souls influence, you are a humanoid stone creature with a black hole for a head which you can use to parry/consume other predominantly stone based enemies to make yourself better. You also get weapons that are attuned to strength, dexterity or resonance and perform better the better you are in those categories.

While this game seems to play fine without a controller, it is quite hard for me to get into as you are literally dropped into this alien landscape with no clues of what to do, no quest hook outside the tutorial instructions, and very little story (at the start at least). As such it failed not only to retain my attention but to even grab it in the fist place, and is now uninstalled. If you can't get me to invest in what's happening, then it's not a good game. Not recommended.

Chupa (Movie) and Organ Attack (Card Game)

Made for kids!?

Chupa

A young boy visits his family in Mexico where they befriend a friendly baby Chupacabra and must hide it from the evil foreign researchers. Despite not being the highest budget film the CGI of the critter is rather nice and the child actors do an OK job. Obviously the entire plot is tailored for a young latino audience so expect to read subtitles if you aren't fluent in Spanish and don't expect high levels of viole... well, anything really. Don't expect high levels of anything. Unless you are this target audience, I suspect you can find better things to watch.

Organ Attack

After distributing organ cards, which are all face up so everyone can see them, each player gets five attack cards which can damage a particular organ (making it hard to target specific people), block damage, return damage or cause necrosis to instakill an organ. The objective is to destroy the organs of your competitors while protecting your own, so you'll be doing cruel things like giving your buddies strokes, multiple sclerosis, rupturing their appendix and other horrible diseases like that.

The art tries to inject humor into this but my gaming group just found it to be horrible theme, especially as we know people who were affected / died to many of the said cards. Not recommended. Exploding Kittens is a better alternative if you are in the market for something similar.

Black Adam and Black Panther: Wakanda Forever

The king is dead!

Black Adam

In a fictional Middle Eastern place oppressed by Intergang (mercenary goons who apparently never flee), a dangerous artifact and a powerful being (the titular Black Adam, played by Dwayne Johnson) with the powers of Shazam are discovered and released into the world. While Adam is viewed as a savior by the locals, internationals forces feel he is a threat and send other heroes to apprehend him. Violence ensues because he's one tough cookie.

While the plot is mostly predictable here, the action scenes are a great spectacle and there are lots of them (though almost all are just of the CGI variety). I also do find it refreshing for this superhero protagonist to be super violent to the extent that he goes out of his way to kill people. Alas the main child actor is a bit weak in the acting department and suspect his "cool" skateboarding skills were meant to make up for it. Nope. At one point he tries to sneak quietly ON A SKATEBOARD. Expect silly things like that. Also the female hero was unnecessary and could have been cut from the film. Still an enjoyable flick if you turn your brain off.

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever

In an attempt to continue to hold monopoly on their space rock, the recently kingless Wakandians (futuristic spear wielding Africans) find themselves in conflict with the ocean city state of Talokan (futuristic spear wielding aquatic Mexicans) who happen to have space rock of their own. This results in ridiculous unnecessary pursuits, poor decisions, some flat comedy, stupid CGI battles (seriously, Black Adam's were better but at least here the are non CGI fights which are great) and a lot of bloodless violence. Did they really try make this movie for kids while also including numerous languages that you'd need to subtitle for?

The worst part is I didn't care about the characters at all. The antagonist is a moron, protagonist Princess Shuri (Letitia Wright) is a whiny know it all who doesn't obey orders and so obviously she gets along with student genious Riri (Dominique Thorne) who is introduced here to setup Ironheart (As an aside: Why? Is she so weak a character she needs a movie intro? Answer: Yep). But my favorite thing to laugh at here? The aquatic Mexicans were destroying people and buildings with water balloons! 

Terrible movie. Probably better if it had focused on the bad guy as the main character, ditch the Black Panther/Wakanda title, and explained better why he didn't try harder to make friends with the surface world or just Wakanda itself. As it is the entire plot could have been solved with simple diplomacy. Not recommended.

Rambo: Last Blood

He doesn't actually drink coffee. Or eat.

Retired soldier John Rambo (Sylvester Stallone) now mostly spends his days training horses, enabling his PTSD, and blaming himself for people he can't save. Thanks to the actions of a stupid teenager, he finds a new foe in a medium sized group of Mexican thugs whom he is quite happy to do very bad things to.

Still many HPs to go.

While the predictable plot moves at a good pace, almost all the action is loaded onto the tail end of this film and it is well worth the wait as people die in very horrible and entertaining ways. The rest of the movie? Eh, passable enough - but I'd probably just watch the last bit again. Still an ok film for action fans or Rambo fans.  I give it two and a half cartridge traps out of five.

The Purge (five movies)

Release the beast!

In the America of this universe, one night every year is a twelve hour window where any and all crime, including murder, is legal. This night is called "The Purge".

The Purge (2013)

James (Ethan Hawke) is a security specialist who sells high quality home barricades, specifically designed for Purge night. Alas for him, his kids are absolute morons when it comes to security which makes for a somewhat exciting evening with one good action sequence towards the end. Setting up the foundations of what "the purge" is, makes for an interesting story but I have to wonder just how big their house is that they can lose people in it. Also, way too many walking in the dark scenes with nothing happening. I'd still watch it again though. Two and a half robot dolls out of five.

The Purge: Anarchy (2014)

Instead of being stuck in a house the entire movie, this one mainly follows Leo (Frank Grillo) as a man on a mission during purge night but can't help himself in getting the side quests of helping people he runs into. A much bloodier and way more fun film that the first that shows just how depraved some of these participants are, how desperate others are to sell their lives to the purgers, and how the government likes to participate too. Definitely a step up from the first movie, I score it three and a half out of five. Definitely would watch this one again.

The best purger.

The Purge: Election Year (2016)

Leo (Frank Grillo) is back as the bodyguard to a senator who is trying to abolish the purge, and given her rising popularity she soon becomes the target of mercenaries during purge night. Somehow, they manage to make purgers even more demented this time around and having shop keepers who happen to be ace shots also seems plot devicey but hey - maybe they really just practice all day when not tending the store? Still a decent flick and I'd probably watch it again. Three Christmas lit cars out of five.

The First Purge (2018)

Exploring the first "experiment" that would later turn into the Purge, this prequel's protagonist is Dmitri (Y'lan Noel) - the top drug lord on Staten Island, which is the isolated area for this test run. People are actually paid to stay there, or more to participate for the duration and surprisingly there are very few murder-psychos running around. An ok movie, it suffers from a long lead up before the purge night begins, and again more idleness while people commit only minor offenses. Unlikely I'd watch this one again, I give it two sewer pervs out of five.

The Forever Purge (2021)

Mexican immigrants (played by Ana de la Reguera and Tenoch Huerta) are the main protagonists of this movie (so expect a fair bit of Spanish), as crazed Americans extend the purge beyond the time limit to cleanse the country of people who don't belong. Surprisingly, while there is a lot of gunfire in this movie, it seems much more tame this time around (except for one part with an obvious trap). That doesn't mean its not entertaining, but it does make the purge seem less dangerous than it should be. I give it two and a half archers out of five.

Grim Fandango (Remastered)

Dark humor with a Mexican flair in a cute (but difficult) package.

Stuck in a dead end travel agent job, Manny finds something amiss in the land of the dead and soon is on a quest to make it right. This point and click adventure has a lot going for it: stunning backdrops, a super easy point and click interface, awesome voice acting and script, a decent plot and cute and memorable characters - which is amazing given everyone is a skeleton (or a demon).

There is decent music too.

It does lack the subtitle option, but more problematic are some of the puzzles. More than once did I need to look for online hints on how to proceed, and the reason was usually because I had to use an item on a non-active part of the background. The signpost in the forest is a good example: You can pick it up and put it down anywhere - but you need to put it down in exactly the right spot to trigger a cut scene to proceed.

If only it didn't have such frustrating segments like that - I'd give it a better score. As it is I give it 3 scythes out of 5. I do recommend it though as it is a very enjoyable ride, and if you can get through without use of tips then all the more power to you!

The Fast and the Furious: 3 & 4

The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift

This movie actually happens somewhere during the credits of Furious 6. :P

There's an all new cast this time around, mainly focusing on an adrenaline and car-racing junkie (Lucas Black) and due to getting into trouble early on is sent to live with his dad in Tokyo. He quickly gets into old habits and gets himself into trouble with yakuza because... Japan! And ultimately learns to take responsibility for his actions. It's a pretty basic plot, but at least the different setting is refreshing. Don't expect to have escaped the "gansta" music though - now you just get it in Japanese. Obviously there's some Japanese spoken too.

Positives: It looks like they learned their lesson from last time and have less "talking while racing" as well as less "special FX while racing" with pretty intense and impressive stunt work happening - mostly focused on drifting as the title might give away. Also, despite being pretty "late" in the chronological order of things because it was made earlier than the in between movies it offers almost no spoilers. What I like most about it is they aren't shy about showing what happens to cars when you crash. There is a -lot- of automotive damage in this movie. I also quite liked the Initial D feel of the mountain race. Han is very cool.

You might not know it yet, but I'm actually the main character.

Negatives: There are also -lots- of party scenes. I mean LOTS (possibly more than the last two movie combined), most of which could have been cut out since they serve just as background while main characters walk from point A to B. This is probably to get the most out of all the scantily clad extras everywhere. Think Miku from the last movie x50. Also, while there is less "talking while driving dangerously", they didn't get rid of it altogether. One of the silliest scenes for me is two characters having a heart to heart while drifting down a mountain at speed, and the "driver" is obviously not driving thanks to her poor position.

All up I think those two sections balance each other out so I'm forced to just give this film two tires out of five. I also have no intention of watching it again.

~~~

Los Bandoleros

Takes the gear to the next level... down. Possibly two levels down.

I'm not sure what the point of this 20 minute little film is as the plot basically focuses on Vin Diesel recruiting people for the next movie below. It also does a pretty poor job of explaining why he is targeting oil - because the price is going up so he's going to give it away ala Robin Hood to the poor.

Logically, if you do that the oil companies would just increase the price even more? Moron. Anyway, there's no racing to be had here and most of the average camera work film is in Spanish. I don't know why, but despite all that I kinda enjoyed the slower pace of it. I guess I've taken a liking to his crew! Still, I can only give this one tire out of five, and don't really have a need to watch it again. You won't miss much for skipping it.

~~~

Fast and Furious

Welcome back Vin. We missed you!

In this fourth film, Dominic Toretto (Vin Diesel) is up to his old tricks again with a few familiar faces in the Caribbean. Unfortunately, his decision to try protect his girl friend by leaving her (really, that's a stupid move) goes incredibly bad and leads to him on a vengeance quest again an unknown cartel boss. Cop guy from the first movie is also back and happens to be hunting the same guy so a team up sounds pretty logical, but only after they get their machisimo out of the way.

Sports cars vs 4 Wheel Drives?

Like movie number two, this movie has the bad guy hiring drivers to deliver stuff which happens to be their "in" to the organization - pretty damn convenient if you ask me. Also, you are now treated to Mexican "Gangsta" music. Admittedly I'm getting used to hearing this genre now, which quite made the more regular acoustic songs of Los Bandoleros a refreshing change.

They also learned from the overuse of party scenes from Tokyo Drift and made an interesting, compressed one where you actually are still interested in what's going on. At the same time they kept the car destruction high which is awesome. Anyway I think this one is back on the same level as the first movie so I give it three tires out of five but again, have no interest in giving it a second watch through.

The End-Times: Suddenly, Zombies

[This is part of The End-Times (Project Zomboid) story.]

Jennifer Reed, Police Officer (intro only)
No one knows where they came from. They suddenly appeared everywhere. There's no choice now. For any others still alive I have to lure away as many of these ... things ... as possible! They seem to be attracted by sound so I'll use that. Hopefully I can take them away from the city and lose them in the forest.

Shaun Jones, Security Guard (beginner)
I knew moving to Kentucky was a bad idea. I haven't been here a week and already there's some zombie apocalyse going on. Good thing I didn't really unpack yet. Seems to me the dead heads are attracted by noise so it's better to leave quiet like with my pre-prepared pack of supplies and water. I saw some train tracks on the way in. The plan is to follow those and get the hell out of here.

Nick Hernandez, Construction Worker
JESU-CRISTO! Is this how the world ends!? I might only live in a trailer and my whole life spent only in building things, but by the grace of God, the almighty Father, and this handy two by four I am going to smite all these ugly cabrones that threaten my home! Bring it on, pendejos!

Kimberly Ward, Park Ranger
Woke up to some loud sirens racing past the house, so I look out the window and what do I see? OMG - Zombies!?! I don't know what's going on! The TV doesn't work, and I picked a really bad time to start that diet! There's literally no food in the house, just designer handbags and fashion magazines. Think brain, think!

I know! I'll just raid the creepy fat dude's house. He's fat, so he should have lots of food. Right? This can be payback for all the times I've caught him perving at my bed room window...

What luck - he's not home to get mad at me for breaking his window. Or taking some of his food! I'm sure he wouldn't care about me burning some bacon in his microwave either. I was distracted by this shiny pistol I found in one of his drawers. NICE. Oh look, the fat bastard is out on the street... he's one of them? Hah! Serves him right!

Wait, no I got a better idea. Let me get this door open... "HEY YOU, FAT ASS!"

Haha, he's even uglier now as a zombie. He so has this coming as I point his own gun at him and pull the trigger with a satisfied grin on my face.

*click*

Eh?

[Dead: 1 Day 6 Hrs]

Chuck Gray, Angry Fireman
When will that stupid bitch stop screaming? Ah there we go. Serves her right for confronting one of those with an empty gun. There are zombies. So what? Not my problem. I'm just going to shut all my curtains, read my books and cook some food from my well stocked fridge.

Earl Parker, Unemployed
Wow, everything's going to hell eh? Well unlike that Mexican motherfucker with the two by four defending his "home" I'm not really attached to this caravan. It's my third ex-wifes really. I only inherited it when she accidentally fell onto some bullets and rolled into the lake tied to a concrete block. Sure looks like it's everyone for themselves now, and if I can choose which house I want to be mine next... it would be that one. The pink, two story one. Aheheheh!

With a bag full of booze and a golf club I once found on some rich, fool who was killed in a hit and run by a car I happened to be driving at the time, I'm headed over to claim my prize.

Turns out it was well guarded, but not well guarded enough. The window was easy to open, and killing the five cute, zombified dorm girls inside was actually kindof... arousing. Aheheheheh.

The Titan Project

Part of my XCOM: Defenders of the Earth series!

Soldiers Lost in the Sixth Month: 1
Campaign Total: 21

A large UFO appeared over Egypt just as the month came to an end and despite the best efforts of my Firestorm and Raven interceptors stationed there the crafty craft got away, leading me to get a grade of "B" at the end of month six. With almost all the world having satellite coverage now and good funding coming in (everyone still backing XCOM) I put in an order to get more Firestorms out there and to outfit them all with plasma cannons. Also, I finally decided to buy some armor for the troops now that there are people worth protecting - getting three suits of heavy titan armor constructed, which would see near to immediate use as a large UFO had landed in Mexico (maybe the one that got away from Egypt).

Sent Gravedigger, Techno Viking, Guy Smiley, Blunder Buss, Buster Downs and our second Psionic - Adolf Hitler to investigate. After eliminating the thin men and heavy jetpack boys guarding outside I got the team to circle around the craft to try something new. Buster Downs lobbed a grenade at the control compartment, revealing a pair of sectoid commanders who were easily gunned down by the surprise attack. From that position they also then exploded the opposite wall from which some wierd noises were coming from, revealing a muton team standing beside an alien powersource. A rocket from Hitler followed by good shooting put them down quick... and then came the cavalry in their blood red armor.

Not quite.

These elite muton bastards had armor to match our titan suits and put up a huge fight, injuring a number of the team and killing Guy Smiley with a ridiculously distant grenade throw. Eventually Techno Viking managed to flank them and really pour on the hurt, with Gravedigger mindflaying one to death. They were the last enemies on this site. Mission complete!

My Churro, Your Taco

Part of my XCOM: Defenders of the Earth series!

Soldiers Lost in the Second Month: 2
Campaign Total: 9

After selling a surplus of scopes to Russia to help them with some missile launch, it was time for another council meeting and the end of month two. Thanks to last minute satellite launches everyone was still onboard with the XCOM project giving me a grade of "A" again, but those little panic bars just seem to keep creeping up. A large UFO made an appearance not long after but my little fighter plane had no chance to shoot that one down so I ordered it back while it could still fly. Back in the base I -FINALLY- have my officer training school and can now send FIVE operatives on the field.

Just what I need, because Dr. Vahlen's wailings were getting too annoying and it was time to capture one of the bastards. Next contact was at a gas station in Mexico where floaters and thin men were enjoying burritos I suppose. I sent veterans Panicman, Mister "Nuke" Mustachio, Big Mike, Gravedigger and David "the lucky Jew" because he got to carry the tazer. :P

Taking cover next to cars and pumps at a gas station sounded like a catastrophic plan but it surprisingly worked very well. With suppressing fire from Panicman, accurate sniping from Gravedigger and well placed grenades and rockets from heavies Big Mike and Mustachio the aliens lost their cover pretty quick, followed by their lives. The Lucky Jew even managed to taze one before almost getting killed himself, yet on one HP he killed two more bastards with his pistol and flanked a thin man for a point blank shotgun blast.

Mission complete! Excellent performance all around if I do say so myself, and finally Dr. Vahlen is happy. I saw her singing and skipping past my office door with a large bottle of lube in hand. That poor, poor alien we captured though...

Dr. Dolly Vahlen is ready to begin the "interrogation".