Elden Ring: Offer introspection

[Part of my Elden Ring journal]

Following the kill list leads to some pretty interesting discoveries, such as bosses that only appear at night like Nazgul Night Cavalry, Skull Birds and Darth Vader the Bell Bearing Hunter who turns out to be my final and most difficult quarry. Even the tricksy crypt dungeons and ancient dragons are easier than the last iteration of that guy, mainly because I can't use my mimic summon to help me out. Instead I used bewitching branches to get some of those oversized rats to do the dirty work for me.

You know it's bad when they can hold lightning.

I'm surprised good old Patches is on the list too, but he's obviously been murdered by highwaymen by the time I eventually find him, just like Corhyn the priest whose gear I find just outside the capital. I find some new people too, a giant lady that Latenna saves in the snowfield, a rookie finger maiden who I eventually lead to immolation (oops) and an ugly monkey tailor who wishes to be human. I help him rebirth via Renalla (yeah, ew) which works... and also results in him dying because this is Elden Ring and people just die for no reason.

Anyway, with all the bosses finally crossed off I'm content to call this adventure done and return to where Ranni awaits to begin our journey to the stars. That was a crazy experience but one I definitely enjoyed and one I hope was entertaining for you to read! Elden Ring, complete!

Elden Ring: Seek hole, and then edge

[Part of my Elden Ring journal]

Of course I hop into the coffin which turns out to be a magical lift (wut) that takes me to the roots of the giant tree and is home to giant flying ants and headless ghost knights. I also find free hug Fia here who makes me slay five other warriors including a mage friend of D and a fat armored fencer who helped me against Radahn! After I win she begs for death but since she's technically helping me remove the competition to become and Elden lord I spare her.

As that's a dead end I check in with Iji who drops a hint about where Ranni has gone to - a tower near her own. Inside I find a lift deep down into an ant hive where I find Ranni discarded among some garbage. I pick her up and defeat the traitorous half-wolf Blaidd then continue down past a "drow" city complete with BS sentient boulders then through a lake of rot (no horse this time - yuck!) past an ancient temple of bug men and defeat a horrid giant skull-faced dragonfly.

Beyond that is a lift to a plateau where I get a rematch against magic dragon Adula, killing it this time, and then finding a more appropriate doll for Ranni to inhabit. She is super greatful and recognizes me as her lord. I like the sound of that! Using this inspiration I return to the capital and defeat Volcano Manor targets Wilhelm and Vagran with the help of Volcano Knight Bernahl, and then crush King Morgott with Melina and my mimic!

She's a creepy doll.

Elden Ring: Ahh, jumping...

[Part of my Elden Ring journal]

Nokron is primarily inhabited by three things: living vikings (who are easier to fight than their spirit versions below), zombies with magic weapons and mimics - one of whom copies me! It has no chance since I can summon the ghost headless though. Same with the second ancestral spirit stag boss that I put down again. Parkouring down the rooftops I earn a mimic summon of my own and some sort of knife, while going the other way leads me to Siofra aqueduct where some random hobo accepts D's armor and joins me as an ally to try defeat a pair of giant, poison barfing gargoyles. While I can almost always down one, it's just too tough to beat both so its time to head elsewhere.

Opting to hunt the next mark, Raleigh, for Volcano Manor I stop by a small mine en route and easily slay the stone digger troll within collecting his great club! Slower to swing than my current stick but it reaches farther and hits harder. Raleigh is its first victim. Beyond him is a keep sinking into a lake of poison which is naturally inhabited by poison zombies and slugs. The knight boss here is fought in such close quarters I have to revert to my large club and combine it with a tower shield to beat him (with my mimic as well)!

Double club, the natural progression of my club type weapons...

I then report in to the witch Ranni, who is happy with the dagger I collected from Nokron and says she's to leave on a journey now and I also report to Lady Tanith who gives me three more marks to hunt and tells of Volcano Manor's true lord Rykard - one of the elden shard bearers! I might get to meet him if I keep up the good work. For now I return to the twin gargoyles in the aqueduct with my upgraded great club and mimic and this time crush them with the help of hobo D. At the waterfalls beyond lies a comfy looking coffin that asks if I'd like to rest in it. LOL.

Elden Ring: Let there be monarch

[Part of my Elden Ring journal]

Beyond that handsy manor is a cliff face that doesn't get me closer to where I was trying to go, but I do find the tower of doll witch Ranni who recruits me into her team investigating the treasure of Nokron City, which includes Iji, Blaidd and the sorcerer Seluvis. A quick warp back to ghost viking land lets me meet Blaidd there, but he has no idea how to get to the higher city. This time around I have stonesword keys though and I can activate the elevator to the North! This takes me up to...

What the hell, I'm back in plagueville? A narrow golem guarded valley only leads to the local PvP coliseum so I go the other way and find myself back in the horrible plaguelake. This time I fight a slow moving knight commander though, after I find out the nearby geysers can really damage him. Turns out to be a super easy job and I never even have to attack him directly! My reward for this a clue to the secret of ghost magician town: Lighting fires. Seems there's always fires to light...

Godrick the Grafted is good at lighting fires...

It's also worth noting that the soldiers here in plagueville actually have a base - a huge castle at the South most end. I opt not to raid that one though, as the "main quest" I'm supposed to be doing is raiding Stormveil Castle, which I've been so deftly avoiding until now. Using my mount to deftly skip the blockade defenses I beat up the towering gate guard with a rotten dog summon (my spare if I ran out of FP to summon ghost viking), and then sneak my way through most of the place until I find and slay the Grafted Lord who rules over it. My ghost viking was very helpful here! The Roundtable Hold members rejoice at this news and let me meet their "god", a literal silent two finger giant but basically I get "good job, now kill another lord". Lol.