Deadpool & Wolverine and Dune: Part 2

Sequels to good movies!

Deadpool & Wolverine

After an encounter with the TVA who reveal his universe is going to end due to the lack of an anchor being, a retired Wade Wilson (played by Ryan Reynolds) goes off to find a replacement Wolverine (Hugh Jackman). Shenanigans ensue with numerous cameos and jokes that hopefully people still get many years from now. As usual its very rude, quite funny to the point of ridiculousness, and action packed using the tried and true "if nothing funny or emotional is happening, a fight breaks out" technique. Recommended if you are a fan of Ryan's Deadpool and/or Hugh's Wolverine. On the flip side, if you disliked any of the previous Deadpool movies you will definitely not like this one too. :P

Dune: Part 2

Hiding with the desert folk after the destruction of his house, Paul Atredies (played by Timothée Chalamet) learns their ways while also having a vision that specifically tries to avoid. But no, his allies convince him to do the thing anyway and then possibly get upset after he does the thing that he warned them he didn't want to do. Really though, most of this 2 hour and 46 minute film is an absolute snooze fest. Visually nice if you can stay awake, but really they needed to cut off some fat from the run time. Easiest one is the whole bit where group A ambushes a harvester, killing their guards and then use a long ranged rocket to destroy the machine. Five seconds later, they just use a long ranged rocked to destroy the next machine. Did we really need that previous prolonged action scene? Nope. Does it change anything that they destroyed the harvester? Nope. Do I recommend this movie? Nope.

Midnight Suns: Sticky Fingers

[Part of Superhero Stories]

Hearing his name spoken in a heavy, threatening manner Dr. Morbius groggily opened his eyes to find he was still bleeding out on the floor of his secret underground laboratory. A vampire, bleeding out? The irony wasn't lost on him as he recognized the figure looming above him. "Just my luck that the daywalker finds me today," he spat. "Why were these other vampires attacking you?" questioned Blade menacingly.

"They weren't the problem," Morbius replied weakly while gesturing to a number of mangled vampire corpses strewn about the place. "It was that arsehole mercenary who took my freshly made sunlight vial... can you believe he actually tried to finish me off with a steak?" he chuckled, the rotting ribeye still next to him. Blade wasn't in the mood for laughs and picked him up by his collar with one hand. "You were making a serum to let vampires walk in the sun!?"

"Couldn't let you have all the fun could I?" Morbius could barely finish grinning before Blade beheaded him to finish him off for good. The daywalker then used his keen sense of smell and incredible speed to track down this merc who as it turns out, hadn't gone very far yet as he was sauntering down a narrow alley in his red spandex. "Hey, ass-clown!" called Blade with his weapons drawn. Deadpool turned around in surprise. "Blade!? I didn't know you did compliments!"

Swords, guns and leather. They've got a lot in common.

"Hand over the sunlight vial now," hissed the vampire hunter as he pointed his Uzi at Wade. "You mean this little thing?" taunted the mercenary as he pulled out a yellow looking vial to display. "Nuh uh, I'm not..." before Deadpool could finish that sentence the vial broke as Blade shot it out of his hand, peppering Deadpool's arm with bullets. "Oh you've done it now," grumbled the merc as he drew his own two blades and charged. "And if this idiot typing the story knows anything at all, its that you have no chance against... WHAT THE F...!?"

Deadpool's movement and train of thought was interrupted as he was covered in a sticky white substance. "Oh, its WEB. Phew, I thought this was going someplace totally different for a second there..." exhaled Wade as he harmlessly fell over and Spiderman descended while hanging upside down behind the daywalker. "I had him," grumbled Blade angrily, causing Parker to apologetically keep quiet after a weak "I'm sorry..?"

Blade didn't hear it. Instead he turned back to the helpless Deadpool while cracking his knuckles. "Now you're going to tell me all about your employer..." 

The Adam Project and Rescued by Ruby

A pair of movies on Netflix.

The Adam Project

Time travel is not only real, it's already being abused which leads time traveling hero (Ryan Reynolds) on his quest to set it right but first he crash lands into his younger self (Walker Scobell, who does an excellent job). The special effects are excellent here, and while the flick is entertaining the story has more than a few bits that are super convenient - like person X saves the day out of nowhere and no one but the hero has the super useful "not a light saber" that ruins it a little. Still ok if you like Ryan Reynolds but otherwise, stay away. Not one I'd watch again.

Rescued by Ruby

Better than expected!

A determined state trooper (Grant Gustin) eager to join the K9 unit opts to adopt and train a hyperactive half border collie named Ruby to try make it into the squad. While I'm not fond of purely drama films, which this is, I have to say I really enjoyed it. It's got a good story based on real life, good acting and a lot of good doggies! Best of all, it did hit in the feels / created an emotional response which is an excellent sign of a successful film. Recommended, and if you like dogs, highly recommended! I would happily watch this one again.

Red Notice In Time

A pair of movies in the middle of the deck.

Red Notice

The plot for this action comedy where no one knows how to shoot has an FBI agent (Dwayne Johnson), thief (Ryan Reynolds) and a femme fatale (Gal Gadot) race against/team up to collect all of Cleopatra's eggs (wtf) for a huge pay day. Most of the cool parts happen near the early part of the film and some of the action sequences later on should probably just have been cut out. Annoyingly, the story itself is only mediocre with just one particular high note that makes the ending somewhat anticlimactic. Two jumper cables out of five and no, I wouldn't watch this one again.

In Time

In an alternate world where people are genetically modified to remain 25 and get a clock for only one year to live which also doubles as this world's currency, Will (Justin Timberlake) is one of the many poor people who literally lives with only the hours of the day in reserve - requiring to earn more via a low paying job. A twist of fate gives him the opportunity to try fight the system using the tried and true method of crime.

Better than Red Notice.

While this film has an interesting premise and some decent acting, it is let down by the story itself wherein every single character has the flaw of lacking foresight. So many things could have been avoided if any of the characters just had some planning skills. Ah well. It's an OK movie, but it could have been a fantastic one. Two and a half time capsules out of five and yes, I'd watch it again.

Free Guy and Escape Room (1 & 2)

All about trapped protagonists.

Free Guy

Guy (Ryan Reynolds) is mostly content at his bank job in Free City, until he learns that its not all as it seems. For a predictable plot this is actually very good, with excellent special effects and many funny moments that will appeal to everyone, especially online gamers. Good script + good acting = highly recommended, I give it four out of five and would easily watch this one again.

Escape Room

Six strangers all take the bait to participate in an escape room scenario to change their lives. What they don't know is this particular one is tailored for them, using a seemingly implausible unlimited budget, and features many death traps. While the rooms themselves border on unbelievable, this makes for great entertainment to see which of the six - if any - will survive the ordeal, which is definitely a genre in my wheelhouse! It's not perfect by any means but definitely worth a watch once (be warned, one room has flashing lights the entire time), I give it three lighters out of five.

There's no getting out.

Escape Room: Tournament of Champions

A direct sequel to Escape Room sees more hapless fools drawn into even crazier puzzles, but this time we get to see more of the people behind the dastardly design. Highly recommended if you enjoyed the first movie as it is very much more of the same just with even more nonsensical solutions (or explained away too quickly for me) in some cases. Another three sea shells out of five.

Definitely, Maybe

Who's your mommy?

When a young girl asks her dad (Ryan Reynolds) how her parents met, he indulges her in a tale of romance and broken hearts but replaces the names of the women to see if his daughter can correctly guess which one her mom is.

Answers: should you watch it?

This proves to be an entertaining mechanic for this rom-com as it does leave both her and the audience wanting to find out the answer to the question. It's a decent plot with interesting characters played by competent actors, the kid included.

It's a bit strange that they don't age through out the telling though, as the story spans years, but that's ok. Not a bad movie at all, but probably not one I'd watch again. I give it two and a half rehearsals out of five.

The Hitman's Bodyguard

Can't plan for everything!

Why would a hitman (Samuel Jackson) need a bodyguard (Ryan Reynolds)? Because he happens to be the key witness in a trial against one evil president (Gary Oldman). As expected, it is not even close to smooth sailing as the pair are just as likely to kill each other in this entertaining action comedy.

It's a fun time!

Expect a decent body count and a lot of swearing. There are some surprisingly good fight and chase sequences too, definite props to the stunt team for that. I don't want to give anything more away so I'll head straight to my score: 3.5 Jags out of 5 and I would definitely watch it again.

Pokemon: Detective Pikachu

Some mysteries can only be solved by yellow lightning bunnies.

Upon hearing of his father's death Tim (Justice Smith) runs into the titular detective (voiced by Ryan Reynolds) and winds up helping him solve more than one mystery, all of which are thankfully explained quite well by the end.

It's so cute!

As a world inhabited by Pokemon I was most impressed with the CG invested here. Everything is fantastic, especially the action scenes and anything with Pikachu. It must have taken ages to render all that yellow fur! The plot itself is decent too and the leads carry the acting side nicely.

The movie also cleverly skirts the whole, enslaving animals to fight each other issue by openly going there right at the start then switching scene to Ryme city where humans and pokemon live in harmony (though I suspect they eat each other on occasion).

All up, this is a surprisingly good film and one I can recommend fully. 4 mimes out of 5. Would I watch it again? You'd better believe it.

Hobbs & Shaw

When a lethal virus goes missing it's up to two unlikely partners Luke Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson) and Deckard Shaw (Jason Statham), who have partnered before, to retrieve it from a cybernetically enhanced assassin. Much like the other Fast & Furious movies which spawned this spin-off, there is a mix of fast cars, violence, and ludicrousness. Is that a word? If not, I need the word that describes fat tribal guys beating up highly trained spec-ops teams. Yeah, that word.

The perils of being a panty inspector.

Entirely predictable, this one is definitely only for turn off your brain action buffs as there's more on the "beating people up" than car racing. The plot is so shallow there's not much else to say other than Vanessa Kirby is hot? I give it 2.5 surprise Ryan Reynolds out of 5. Probably not going to watch it again.

Deadpool 2

Even better than last time!

Once again Ryan Reynolds is fantastic as Deadpool, and with a less predictable script this time around, a handful of cameos, funny jokes and violent action sequences this is definitely now one of my favorite movies.

The bestest of frenemies!

The main negative I can find with it is that a lot of the humor will go over heads of people who haven't been watching (or have forgotten) all the other popular movies as of late (at least superhero ones).

Other than that it is an extremely well made action flick that has some surprisingly moving segments. It should be no surprise that I'm giving this five bowls of foreshadowing out of five. Will I watch it again? Yes! Even though I already watched it twice at the cinema! :)

Today I Smiled: Eurovision 2018

Another year means another Eurovision! As you all know I'm a bit of a fan of this event, and this year had a combination of nice eye candy,  a douchebag intruder for the UK's entry, a wiggly Australian, a pyromaniac piano vampire, some heavy metal screamers, an opera singer in a cool laser dress, and some peace loving vikings.

Sometimes I think there's a secret "who can burn the stage" contest too.

I quite liked those last two, as well as Greece's song and Albania's Rock entry. Even if you skip all the above, the next three you probably should watch: Moldova's superbly choreographed and humorous number, the actual winning entry from Israel which involves a bit of clucking and eye gymnastics, and my personal favourite this year: Germany's touching "You Let Me Walk Alone".

Last but not least, here's a clip of Deadpool (Ryan Reynolds) questioning why Canada isn't a part of Eurovision. :)

Deadpool

A refreshing, hilarious and bloody take on a Superhero movie.

If only more "heroes" just nonchalantly killed their enemies eh? At it's core Deadpool is an origin story of how Wade Wilson (Ryan Reynolds) becomes a nigh unkillable and more than slightly off-kilter hero. Again! Yes, because that previously happened in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. A fact they love bringing up throughout the course of the film.

You know you want to watch it.

Perhaps Deadpool's best ability is that of breaking the fourth wall, taking many opportunities to talk directly to the audience, often about things from other movies. It's very funny with humor aimed at adults. There's also nudity, sex scenes, action, violence and on screen gore which gets big thumbs up from me.

Despite having a predictable story, the way it's told is still pretty good and the acting, humor and special effects are great. All up it is definitely something I enjoyed and a film I'd like to watch again! I give it four and a half out of five fourth walls. Which is like... eighteen walls. It's that awesome. :)

Edit: Adjusted down from a perfect five. Why? Because I forgot my milestone marker was The Dark Knight.

The Proposal

Sandra Bullock plays an abrasive and much disliked boss who blackmails her assistant (Ryan Reynolds) into marrying her to get around being deported. Of course this lie doesn't go smoothly when real feelings become involved. Yep, another pic by my wife - I found myself laughing quite a lot during this romantic comedy and found it very entertaining. Since there are no explosions or a high CGI requirement they collected decent actors to fill up the cast.

Good leads for this sort of thing.

Betty White is always entertaining for me (fan of Golden Girls, eep) but is outdone by Oscar Nunez's "Ramone". It also helps that the setting quickly changes from that of a busy city to the picturesque Alaska. Bonus points for having an adorable puppy! There are some odd bits such as the Indian chanting segment and why in the world would Ryan Reynolds undress entirely on a balcony IN ALASKA? Is it not cold there? Well, I guess if I looked like Ryan Reynolds maybe it would be different but I digress. :P

If you dislike rom-coms but are forced to see one, this isn't such a bad choice. For everyone else, I give it three and a half Samoyeds out of five. That's three full grown ones and one puppy by the way, don't go chopping dogs up. Surprisingly, I also wouldn't mind watching this again.

Safe House / Safe

Safe

Getting killed is bad business.

A little Chinese girl who happens to be very gifted with numbers is kidnapped and used by Chinese mobsters in the USA to "count" for them. She is eventually also given important information that makes her a target not only by the rival Russian mobsters but also to the corrupt police force. Jason Statham, who manages to piss off the Russian mobsters right at the start of the film, runs into her by coincidence and decides to protect her because he's the protagonist, and that's what protagonists do.

 

Does he look like someone you want to piss off?

Good stuff first: Statham is in good fighting form here, and racks up a decent body count. The little actress (Catherine Chan) is also very good and not annoying in any way. It's also nice to see Reggie Lee (Sgt. Wu from Grimm) here, and while the film ends somewhat abruptly it fits in well and doesn't become dragging at any point. Worst part is the start, which is unnecessarily messy and convoluted with all the sudden cuts. It's a good example of misuse of timeline as it only serves to be annoying.

All up it's an average action flick that doesn't require much thinking, and I give it two bullets out of five. Would I watch it again? A solid maybe. It's really neither here nor there. Guess I'm playing it Safe?

~~~

Safe House

Making house keeping look awesome.

Ryan Reynolds is a "house keeper" for a CIA safe house, which is made out to be a very boring and lonely post. This all changes when a highly wanted criminal (Denzel Washington) is brought in for safe keeping, resulting in all hell breaking lose. Despite the title and the setup, very little of the movie is spent in a safe house which is good as the script keeps everything in flux, in turn keeping the characters and the audience on their toes.

Good thing too or it would be a boring movie.

There are also good action sequences with shooting, hand to hand and the mandatory "car chase if movie is not using heavy CGI". Acting wise it also gets a thumbs up from me, though it does suffer a little from a few plot holes and "but he could have done -x-" moments towards the end. I give this film three and a half guest rooms out of five and can easily recommend it to action fans. I would also happily watch it again.