Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice

Way more than twice.

Made by the same people who made Dark Souls, this is almost just Dark Souls in Japan. In it you play as a ninja protecting a special kid with powers from people that want to abuse said powers. You are also terrible at this, as babysitting was not a quality or talent you have learned.

Instead you'll be spending most of the time exploring, killing and looting while learning skills and earning gear to do the same thing more efficiently. The environments are gorgeous, and the bosses are deadly. As a ninja, you'll need to evade and parry since armor isn't really their thing.

There's also a lot of fire.

Is it a hard game? Yes, and there is no difficulty option. Is it harder than Dark Souls? I'll say ... no. Especially not Dark Souls 3. Why? Many reasons:

1) You are faster than anything else in the game and can literally run or grapple past everything bar the mandatory bosses.

2) Bosses have two "health" gauges. One is life, one is posture. End either and you get a kill shot. Some have more in one than the other, so that comes with the learning.

3) It's strictly single player. There are no enemy players who will ever invade you. In the same token there are no mandatory bosses that you need allies to help with (I needed a lot of help with a few Dark Souls ones).

4) Dark Souls bosses have killed me more than the ones in Sekiro. Sister Friede in particular.

That's not really the question you should be asking though. What you should be asking is, "is it fun?" and the answer to that is hell yes! Highly recommended - I give it 4 artificial arms out of 5.

Dark Souls III: Midir

Tales from Dark Souls - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

It takes a number of goes before I realize the fight against the bridge dragon is really simple. Hide behind a rock, wait for fire to pass, run out, hack his feet twice and run back - repeat. Eventually the winged beast falls off and finally lets me enter his massive cavern boss room where he is MUCH angrier. I am unable to find anyone to help for this fight, so I have a lot of deaths attempts which slowly improve as I begin to be able to read the beast.

Of course he has a laser too!

I'm thankful I fully upgraded my Fume Ultra Greatsword earlier, since hitting his face requires some vertical range. Also, strafing right at mid range happens to avoid most of his attacks, except for his flying one in which running left is better. Ultimately, he dies without beating Nunja Friede's record of the most times I died to a boss. As a final challenge I decided to go hunt the dragonslayer in the swamp (since I did his job for him).

He is really tough to duel, but not that bright. In the end I defeat him simply using a robe (for running) and a longbow. This is made really easy when he gets "stuck" on some ruins at the edge of his leash. I just fill him with 99 poison arrows and 33 large arrows which ends him and earns me his armor. Bwahahahah. Done here, I return to the painting girl (in the still slow burning church) and give the child her Uncle Gael's soul. She is thankful and shows me her painting...

It looks like an odd grey nothing at first but as I focus it starts to look like spiraling hues of blue. I can't seem to put my finger on it as I am drawn closer and closer. I also can't seem to breathe...

TESO: New Life Unlock

Adventures of Skyrim - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

For some reason Friede's words "Thy place of belonging" kept ringing in my mind and with the Fire Keeper's help I used my significant soul fire to teleport me somewhere closer to home.

I awoke in a very weakened state in the familiar landscape of Coldharbour. Lucky for me not five minutes goes by before a towering Nord lady named Lyris frees me from my cell, informing me that my current undeath condition was caused by some scum named Mannimarco. With no intention of keeping the silence this time, I took great pleasure in eviscerating all the dremora in the way to our escape route: another prisoner called "the Prophet".

I can still backstab with a two handed sword!

The old guy manages to open a portal back to Tamriel for us, but thanks to Molag Bal's interference Lyris doesn't escape. Just want to note that it is fortunate the Prophet's portal opened over the sea because it was pretty high up! I washed ashore on a snowy little island called Bleakrock and was soon conscripted by the local Dunmer She-Captain into gathering all the townsfolk for an emergency evacuation since Covenant warships were spotted headed this way.

Despite the "rush" I happen to come across a friendly Argonian He Alve who teaches me the art of lock picking, which is now a simple mini game. Simple when someone explains it anyway! Just push down on each tumbler and let go when it starts to shake. More importantly just -remember- when it starts to shake so your second attempt will always work. After this two minute crash course, I've not failed any. Thank you He Alve!

Dark Souls III: Thy place of belonging

Tales from Dark Souls - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

DAMN!

After 30 or so attempts and maybe 10 or so embers, which I'm now using as a heal item rather than a pre-combat buff, I finally win this most epic battle as the nunja does not get up a fourth time (thank god). Is it strange that I'm going to miss her now?

I head out to where the white haired prisoner girl has begun painting on a canvas and tell her of her uncle Gael's (many) deaths. She doesn't seem to mind. Instead she tells me:

Those who aren't ken to fire cannot paint a world...

Those absorbed by fire, must not paint a world.

Don't worry, I haven't forgotten, Mother...

I can hear the fire crackle...

And soon, I will see it...

My thanks, Ashen One.

I will finish the painting.

Of a cold, dark, and very gentle place.

So that it might make a home for someone, someday."

It is with sorrow that I leave her there to die as Ariandel's flames begin to consume the place. That second line strikes a chord for me though. Perhaps it's some sort of clue as to why the fire didn't get linked, and why it's best that I am fireproof.

Dark Souls III: Fighting Fully

Tales from Dark Souls - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

Rejuvenated by the victory I return to face Friede and promptly get face stomped again and again. I do improve though, up to the point where I slay her! But this is Dark Souls, that doesn't really mean I won. See by doing that Ariandel goes ape shit and revives her.

Oh, so the boss fight only starts -now-?

Now I have to fight both a nunja, and a crazed giant bird wielding a cup full of lava! Even with Sir Gael's assistance, this does not end well for me and defeat resets the fight -fully- as per usual.

I opt to head back (bonfire warp works just fine) and chat with Corynx who gives me clues where to find more Estus shards (more healing). I manage to find two more which is still not a full set but it proves to be enough to slay both Friede and Ariandel! Huzzah!

This leads to phase THREE, where our favourite nunja revives again - this time with dual scythes (I guess she killed Scythegirl too) and insane dark magic moves. Yep. I die again. A lot. And this resets the fight -fully-. :P

Dark Souls III: Return from whence thou cam'st...

Tales from Dark Souls - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

Ariandel asks me to fetch Friede but there's no need, as she is already approaching with the exact same ice magicked scythe of the previous white-haired painting lady. It's pretty clear now that she killed her somehow and with Ariandel is now corrupting this world. I would not let that stand!

Or ... maybe I'll just back away now.

It turns out Friede is a nunja though (dual class nun/ninja) who can turn invisible and pretty easily kills me with said scythe. A few goes of this and I am so beaten up mentally I opt to withdraw first, following the suggestion of a player message to cut the long bridge outside.

This then serves as a ladder down to a root maze (guarded by two annoying great Nord archers) which reaches the frozen lake below. The area leads to a flowery valley with the bottom part of that tower where a lady with an affinity for wolves guards a curiously familiar grave.

Though not stated, I'm sure this is Knight Ciaran, especially given how tough she is (and she can somehow parry while attacking, the cheater). Worse when she summons a great wolf for aid. She's not as tough as Friede though, as it only takes me three attempts to defeat her.

Dark Souls III: Mountain of Madness

Tales from Dark Souls - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

Beyond the prison chamber is an exit to a snowy mountain pass which is heavily patrolled by the javelin dudes followed by wolves and the great Nords. In traditional Dark Souls fashion, since I was terribly outnumbered here (worse than 10:1) I decided to go to the old staple: Panic Sprint through everything and somehow it worked!

Oh yuck.

After opening a few shortcuts I found myself entering a large, smelly chamber full of carcasses - a hive of giant flies? While very yucky, these weren't that dangerous to get through since I wasn't silly enough to wake all of them up at the same time. A nearby lever opened a secret passage back at Sister Friede's chapel. How I saw what happened in a cut scene far away - I don't know, but that's not the first time it's happened either. :P

A secret passage from the hive then led to a tangle of roots down to a familiar looking circular tower... damnit. This IS the same painting that I was in before! With nowhere else to go I used a homeward bone to return to Friede and get some answers.

She just casually implied I should leave but didn't actually stop me from descending the secret steps into the large, underground sanctum. At the end was a giant bird man, peering into a golden cauldron. It turns out this is the titular Ariandel.

Dark Souls III: Birdverine

Tales from Dark Souls - spoilers ahead! You can follow the rest of the story here!

Upon properly scouting, I find another path that leads to a bonfire and a rickety wooden bridge spanning a large chasm, leading to some sort of chapel. At the door is a Sir Vilhelm, a knight in black armor with the voice of a chain smoker, who tells me to go in and talk to his boss, Sister Friede.

Friede is very amicable, gifts me a frostbite ring and politely tells me that I have no place here. Vilhelm's echo of this is more direct and aggressive. Yeah I'm going to fight him later aren't I? Deciding against leaving just yet, I follow a path down the mountain side which leads to a small village inhabited my mostly dying birdmen.

Sliding is fun! And one way...

It's good that most of them are dying though, because the few full powered ones are bloody fast and dangerous to fight. They must be infected by something because the strong ones also attack their weak kin. One dying birdman in a kitchen tells me this directly, begging me to stop this disease. There's definitely more than meets the eye here.