Tiny Tina's Wonderlands

Roll for initiative suckas!

This Borderlands off-shoot is all set in the in universe RPG world of Bunkers and Badasses, featuring Tiny Tina as your resident "Bunker Master" and all the humor and a few cameos from familiar faces from the original franchise. It's the most woke of the games (because its Tina's world after all) and got swords, magic and ... guns? Yep, looks like they kept that bit but added a touch of magic to them with my favorite firearms eventually being the ones that fired multiple enemy tracking magic missiles and "regained" ammo when not being fired.

While the voice acting and story is ok (don't expect it to advance any Borderlands related thing) it is certainly a smaller game. Major areas are still medium to large sized maps but everything else is set on the "Overworld" which is a much more convenient way to reach exploration sites (at which point you unlock the teleporters there and can fast"er" travel around). Getting ambushed or going into the mini dungeons there just puts you in a randomized map (maybe 12 variants at most) where you simply have to kill everything that spawns.

It feels a bit cheap but also very on brand. Other than the main quest there's lots of things to do on the side and things to collect for those with a knack for exploration. While it did get repetitive at times it was quite enjoyable. The ocean blessing song in particular was super effective!

Kung Fu Panda 4 and Borderlands (2024)

Accepting change.

Kung Fu Panda 4

Continuing on from the previous movie, Poh (voiced Jack Black) faces his next task of choosing a successor - something he doesn't want at all because it would mean no longer being "the Dragon Warrior". Of course these movies are really all about accepting change, and his adventure this time has side-lined the other high paid voice actors defenders "the Furious Five" off on single sentence hand waved missions (which is a good idea). Funny and entertaining but only watch it after Kung Fu Panda 3.   

Borderlands

When bounty hunter Lilith (Cate Blanchett) is sent to track down a fugitive on her home planet of Pandora, she learns a few things about herself. Oh, and kills a LOT of people in ther process! As regular readers might know, I've played a lot of the Borderlands game series from which this movie is based of. My advice if you are like me: put everything you know about the games and the meta in a box, set the box aside (and maybe air step over it) when you go watch this as it will be more enjoyable as a clean slate than if you have expectations.

I did that, and I was not disappointed. Sure, it's not as gory-violent as the games but its still very entertaining in a PG-13 way. Claptrap (voiced by Jack Black) is actually funny and not as annoying as his game counterpart, and there's just some ridiculous fun in the chase and action sequences that kept us glued to the screen. My wife, who has never played Borderlands, absolutely loved the show and wished it was a series so that there would be more. While I might not have loved it as much as she, I'm in agreement as it wasn't bad at all.

The Outer Worlds

This first person sci-fi RPG is set in a solar system run by greedy corporations on planets where hostile wildlife is aplenty and you get to assemble a ragtag crew of misfits much like that of Firefly. While it plays well enough and the graphics are alright, it runs into two main problems for me - the first being scope. You get to land on numerous planets but the explorable area feels limited, smaller than say Fallout or Borderlands both of which this game tries to emulate, which is actually the second problem because its hard not to compare if you've played these. Its humor isn't as good as Borderlands, the story isn't as sharp as Fallout and exploration is not as enticing as either.

I did like the companion abilities though, as whichever two you bring with you can on command/cool-down perform some pretty epic moves. Yes, some are better than others but that didn't stop me from cycling through all of them regularly. Still not a bad game, but just could have been better. I just can't shake the feeling that they either ran out of time or budget or both.

Borderlands 3: Siren Song

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

After some quick study, Tannis is fully sirened up and destroys the defenses to the Calypso's Cathedral and main base, letting the united Crimson Raiders attack the compound where Ava slays Troy, avenging Maya and absorbing his energy which activates her latent siren gene. Tannis takes her as her apprentice.

Unfortunately Troy had already begun unlocking "the Great Vault" having discovered that the moon was actually the key. Within was meant to be a universe destroying creature that his sister Tyreen wanted to absorb to cement her godhood - she was just running an errand on an Eridian homeworld to kill her father while waiting.

With that out of the way Tyreen warps back to Pandora only to find Lilith and Moze already waiting for her and is wiped out easily by the Mechwarrior. Alas the moon is now too close to Pandora and there's no stopping it anymore except through self sacrifice. Taking her siren powers back from Tyreen's corpse, Lilith becomes the Firehawk once more and uses her gift to fly up and then self detonate on the moon, pushing it away - resealing the Great Vault and saving Pandora.

Will we ever see her again? Probably because there's that Borderlands movie coming out.

Borderlands 3: Tannis Power

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

Clay is very capable for the task at hand: starting a revolt against the COV, slaying their witch who makes midgets regular size, and finding a hidden key piece aboard a crashed spaceship out in the dinosaur infested wilds which thanks to some crazy and now deceased scientists, is also home to smart, gun toting giant monkeys and lazertech fused dinos. After he manages to ice the local Calypso leadership, he finds the remaining key components and hands them all over to the Crimson Raiders as to give Eden-6 a chance at no longer being involved with this conflict.

Dr. Tannis and Moze open up the vault and after the mech warrior defeats the giant within (those holes in the floor are super handy for when it tilts the platform), Tannis does some sciencey stuff to make it that Tyreen can no longer absorb its power, like she did with the previous vault monster. Annoyed at this, the twins kidnap Tannis instead and back on Pandora, Vaughn sees an ad over the echoNET that Dr. Tannis is going to be sacrificed at Carnivora, so he hijacks an appropriate golden ride to gain entry to the carnival which apparently is on a giant motorized vehicle itself!

That's one way to make a mobile circus!

After disabling and boarding it, he fights through swarms of COV before freeing Tannis who reveals that she too is a siren now and probably didn't need rescuing. What she does need is her research materials at her secret lab in a shuttered mine so Vaughn heads on over, makes his way past the varkid colony that's taken up residence, defeats a demon, and collects the material the good doctor requires: mainly stuff involving Handsome Jack's daughter Angel.

Borderlands 3: The Sword and the Gunslinger

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

The next key pieces are on the planet Promethea, home of the Atlas corporation, but it too is under attack by both Maliwan and COV who are in clear alliance. Fortunately, Lilith knows of allies here as well, the first being Mad Moxxi who distracts most of the COV by participating and winning the galaxy wide broadcast of "Who wants to bang a bazillionaire" in nearby Lectra City, basically an all female city wide death match with the winner being able to bang the host in front of a large audience, both broadcast and live (with much audience participation to boot).

Lilith's second ally in the area is the space ninja (warframe?) Zer0 who makes use of the Sanctuary III to assault the Maliwan orbiting death star to end the war and earn the remaining key parts that Dr. Tannis needs to finish the key.  Maya volunteers herself to open said vault where she defeats the impressive guardian monster within only to then encounter the Calypso twins. While Tyreen absorbs the power of the defeated monster, Troy absorbs and disintegrates Maya herself.

While they replay her snuff film on a loop, Dr. Tannis discovers that this vault seems to be linked to another on Eden-6, the swampy home world of the Jakobs family who are also in conflict with the COV. They hire a trusty gunslinger squire named Clay - the lone merc who didn't simply take Calypso money and leave like a whore.

Borderlands 3: The Bluehairs

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

While the overweight mechanic Ellie repairs the Sanctuary III, mostly damaged by the idiot droid Claptrap, ship doctor and artifact specialist Dr. Tannis determines where the map is pointing to: a planet called Athenas. Luckily Lilith knows of an ally on that planet: her siren friend Maya who openly admits that they are guarding a piece of a vault key... and that they are under attack from Maliwan forces who are after the same thing!

Maya's also a cosplay favourite it seems.

Maya fights through the hi-tech Maliwan soldiers (the backpacks always seem to be their weak spot) to get to her idiot brat apprentice Ava who was busy not guarding a library as ordered and instead clearing a ratch infestation from the local brewery.

After a long and arduous climb (this is such a grindy and poorly designed level and is in an awkward place in the actual game) the blue haired pair then manage to reach the high temple, make heavy use cover to defeat the Maliwan raid leader and collect the key fragment before beaming up to Sanctuary.

Borderlands 3: Number Vaughn

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

Vaughn officially joins the Crimson Raiders when their leader, Lilith the Firehawk, comes to unintentionally rescue him. She had been looking for the leader of the Sunsmasher gang, which he was until they turned on him to join the rapidly expanding Children of the Vault (shortened to COV) Cult with a vault map piece (what Lilith was actually after) as their joining fee. 

Pants get in the way of fighting!

For his first mission, he quickly heads to the local COV broadcast center where they retrieve the map fragment from the COV Mouthpiece, who broadcasts messages from their "gods" the Calypso twins in a pretty cool boss fight that involves dodging soundwaves from giant speakers. Oh yeah, the new Crimson recruit Moze the Mechwarrior helps out, but Vaughn and his perfectly sculpted abs do most of the heavy lifting.

Upon returning to Lilith they find her stripped of her powers and dignity by the Calypso twins themselves (who happen to be sirens like Lilith) and a large group of their COV followers. Once the god twins have enough demeaning footage to publicly share over the ECHOnet and depart, Vaughn distracts the COV and lures them away while Moze saves their plaything and returns to their hidden base nearby: the Sanctuary III the space ship!

Some Epic Misses

Games I got from Epic's freebies that I didn't get into.

Aven Colony

A space colony builder and management game where all your structures must be connected by -roads- tubes, and all your people kept happy and fed and zzzzzz... Obviously not my type of game, but the graphics and controls are ok so it might interest the builder types among you.

Guild of Dungeoneering

A card based game where you build a dungeoneering guild and send adventurers to -their deaths- collect gold from the dungeons which you also build based on a random deck of cards. Also outside of combat (again card based), you can't really control your adventurer. Instead you need to spawn gold to lure them places. While I like the funny songs that get played the rest of the game doesn't really do it for me.

That's actually a good hand.

KID A MNESIA EXHIBITION

Not a game, an experience. A trippy Radiohead experience... which is also garbage. Stay away.

Tiny Tina's Assault on Dragonkeep (Wonderlands One-Shot Adventure)

While I did enjoy this Borderlands II DLC and can vouch that it will have funny moments in there, I think you will be doing yourself a disservice if played as it stands here - alone. The opening cinematic basically spoils Borderlands II for you, and robs you of all the other interactions you have with the characters outside the DLC. Your call.

Borderlands 2: Boss Killers

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

Having completed our training, we leave Sanctuary STRONGER and absolutely murder an abomination created by Dr. Zed, assassinate a Hyperion DJ and clean up some skag piss as well as the stinky, leaky skags responsible. Even Captain Scarlett pops up again and threatens us with a new wurm who we DESTROY in under two minutes before running off again.

With our INCREASED MURDERICITY we then return to battle Voracidious and Chief Ngwatu, and this time with DL luring the Chief while Jim uses dual rocket launchers on the monster (I gave him mine as it makes sense tactically), and myself throwing 14 fastball grenades at it before going BERSERK in hand to hand - we win in a short but intense battle!

Afterwards we head back to challenge the main big boss BEHIND EVERYTHING... Master Gee! This guy and his baby wurms are still freaking tough, so instead of regular grenades we switch to gravity-pulling ones to keep him off balance. Despite this Jim and DL still go down, but I manage to find some cover and OUTLAST the Master in a long battle of ATTRITION. Once he is dead our job is complete - and the Borderlands are safe again... until we get more DLCs or the next game that is!

Krieg can become pretty invincible too, with the right build!

Insight: Voracidious and Master Gee are two complete opposites in combat. Master Gee is a lengthy survivability test while Voracidious is a fast DPS race. Prepare accordingly!

---

Blaugust Bonus: "If you could meet any person you look up to, who would it be?" -Bhagpuss

My dad. It sounds silly since I already had years and years with him. I guess it really just is never enough huh?

Borderlands 2: Vanquishing Evil

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

The wizard Claptrap is as much of a failure as the regular Claptrap, but thanks to my awesome trap deactivation and jumping puzzle skills we get out of the mine and Jim rewards me with his legendary Fastball grenade because we're awesome (and he says it makes more sense tactically).

We then go up the mountain to Dragon keep, defeating the Handsome Dragon guarding a bridge and then SWORDSPLODING through an evil army before killing the Handsome Sorcerer and disemboweling his Drider-Daughter. With the villain defeated, DL sets free the beautiful rainbow queen of the land... BUTT STALLION! *NEEEEIIIGHH!*

Not so handsome after I'm through with him! Muahahaha!

After she poops out rainbow rewards for us, we learn of more evils that need squishing - starting with the whiney and cowardly prince Jeffrey (from Game of Thrones) who we take turns beating down. We then visit Murderlin's temple arena and survive all the rounds, even the bonus badass round, to learn various magic spells like fireball, chain lightning, and magic missile (regenerating grenades)!

Thus prepared, we revisit the deep mines to face the RAID DRAGONS - a ferocious foursome of winged beasts that we take down for a reward room unlike any other - we spend hours looting the treasure chest filled ruins and complete Tina's campaign!

Insight: You need to pull the swords out of the Immortal Skeletaurs to kill them permanently.

---

Blaugust Bonus: "What is your earliest memory related to one of your core fandoms?" -Syp

That would be the D&D adventure where the party came across a hall full of lifelike statues with a locked door at the end, and I decided to bash it open and fall right into a basilisk den. Due to lousy initiative they got first move and I got turned to stone immediately. I was not useful that session at all. :P

Borderlands 2: Gaming is Training

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

And so we arrive in a desolate land plagued by skelemen and upon reaching the nearby town we find it filled with familiar faces. DL protects tavern owner Moxxi from some rowdy drunks, I chase down some crumpet thieves, and Jim explodes some of the town's scout blimps for Mister "Gatekeeper" Torque before we are allowed to move on to the Forest of Being Eaten Alive by Trees... THIS GAME IS GREAT!

The forest is home not only to angry ents, but also formidable orcs and scary looking spiders. Deeper in we even have to beat up some other adventurers who are camping a boss monster and save a crestfallen player from the invader "n00bkiller" before running into Roland "the White Knight" who is totally OK that Jim shot down the scouting blimp he was on.

Such a dork souls moment!

As recompense we help him retrieve a magic sword from a giant golem and as a reward each get a totally awesome SWORDSPLOSION shotgun which shoots a sword that explodes into more exploding swords! Thank you Mr. Torque! After fighting past dragons and giant skelemen kings we then enter the Mines of Avarice to forge an alliance with the dwarves who all look like Jim!

Everything goes smoothly until I "accidentally" explode the face of the dwarven king turning all the dwarves and their golems hostile. The little bastards even seal us in, but we find the wandering wizard Claptrap nearby willing to help us out... after we forge him a mighty beard taken from dead dwarves and power up his wand by inserting it into a number of magical creatures, before killing them. I DO ALL THE INSERTING!

Insight: Ents are weak to fire while knights are weak to corrosive but I like skelemen best as they're weak against melee!

---

Blaugust Bonus: "Tell us about a person/s or thing/s that has greatly influenced you." -Chestnut

My very patient wife! She has me expanding my palate and perfecting another language.

Borderlands 2: The Face of Killing

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

Annoyed at Pyro Pete's advanced tech, I decided it was time to even the playing field and got me some GOLDEN KEYS. 226 to be exact! With a quick trip to Sanctuary we used a whole bunch to upgrade with totally gnarly weapons which we unleashed back into Pyro Pete's FACE! MUAHAHAHAAHAH! Now we are #1 on Mr. Torque's leaderboard once again!

Acid everywhere!

Since our training to fight people has climaxed (oh my!), it was time to practice on critters and what better spot than the Hunter's Grotto - a swamp that's home to mystical and sometimes very tough vampiric tribesmen, flying spores, massive scorpions and horridly tall spiders. Riding fan boats while hunting these and the giant versions there of, we stumble upon the lab of one Dr. Nakayama who is conducting evil experiments with the local wild life to resurrect Handsome Jack, who he is totally gay for.

It's not long before we find one of his creations - a Jack Scorpion - rather, a giant scorpion with Jack's face and a Hyperion turret on its back. The thing practically kills itself. This Nakayama guy is a loser! We decide the planet will be better off if we KILL HIS FACE TOO! HAHAHAHAH!

It takes a lot of murdering to reach Nakayama's crashed space ship base, but once inside his only defenders are hyperion bots and a Jackenstein monster who I easily carve up once DL and Jim snipe off his shield generators. We don't even have to touch Nakayama as he then accidentally kills himself on some stairs! BWAHAHAHA!

Unfortunately the savage chief Ngwatu who takes his place is less of a laughing matter, as his pet stalker - Voracidious the Invincible (again!?) is another tough, fast, and hard hitting cookie that forces us to withdraw. We decide to go to our trainer, Tiny Tina, for advice and she decides to make us play Dungeons and Dragons BUNKERS AND BADASSES? All right then!

Insight: Here's how I got all those Golden Keys (for FREE of course!):

Make Shift account, link to steam or whatever. Go to rewards section.
Open this link and go through codes. There are a lot - don't forget to look at "Event Codes" tab, particularly at the bottom for unexpired keys.

---

Blaugust Bonus: "What are some of the things that get you excited in life?" -Heather

New cooperative board games!

Borderlands 2: Invincible Comeback

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

Lucky of us, a sponsor has recently been kidnapped in the region by Pyro Pete (Rank #4). Unlucky for him I have a fire-proof shield and beat him down in under half a minute. The sponsor turns out to be Mad Moxxi who sends us to our new trainer... Tiny Tina? WUT?

After some shenanigans with cookies, Tina sends us to participate in the DEATH RACE to train for our next battle. Somehow, both Jim and DL end up letting THE PERSON WHO HATES DRIVING (me) do the driving. Well, turns out just because I don't like it doesn't mean I'm bad at it - and successfully complete the circuit three times in a slow Bandit Technical - winning the last run by a second! I am ELATED!

Tina sends us to do a few more training missions such as getting an autograph from a serial killer and walking her dog giant flaming skag, before letting us face the overweight, cannibalistic bike rider Motor Mamma (#3) in the arena. Her arsenal manages to knock Jim down, but once her bike is destroyed she's mince meat for MY AXE! Mince meat I save for tasty snacks later. Nnnhnhnhhnnyeeesss!

With Motor Mama packed away it's time to hunt for the Rank #2 dude, "Flyboy", guarded by robots and all things flying - but Piston (Rank #1) flips the script and explodes Flyboy from his blimp before our fight can start! Piston tries to bombard us too but DL's turret and sniping skills defeat his balloon and send him crashing to the arena.

There the fight continues against his next vehicle, a monster Badassasaurus truck that Jim explodes with his dual lazers. Finally on foot, I give Piston a face full of buzz axe - splitting his face into two. IT'S BEAUTIFUL!

It's a pretty cool vehicle!

Unfortunately we don't get to keep the #1 ranking for long since Pyro Pete makes a comeback, having trained up significantly to become Pyro Pete the Invincible! What is it with everyone gaining invincibility? He's now a really tough nugget to crack and while not as impossible as Master Gee, is still enough to force the three of us to retreat!

Insight: Multiplayer can probably cheese the race by having a person wait at each checkpoint, but I did it properly meaning use the boost (F key on keyboard) during the straights, and jumping the ramp to the sky bridge also saves some time.

---

Blaugust Bonus: "Tell us 5 facts about yourself." -Jen Thorpe

I'm married, I like (trying to) sing, I make diaries of most games I play, I like cooperative board games, and I dislike money grabbing/gambling lock boxes in all their forms.

Borderlands 2: Eaten by a Rumor

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

After surviving the betrayal, we race to the treasure but are quickly devoured by the Leviathan, a giant sand worm who supposedly guards the lost treasure. Didn't mention it till now cause, well, it was just rumor... until it ate us.

Captain Scarlett is in here too, and after a short scuffle I take her gun and kick her pirate booty further into the monster's poop chute just before it barfs DL, Jim and I back out. Guess it didn't like the gunfire in it's belly, but having us outside meant its own doom.

In under a minute, the Leviathan was dead and right under him - the lost pirate treasure! As the Firehawk thought, this decent loot would certainly help Sanctuary... so we sold it to them for some nice moneys! CHA-CHING! As for Scarlett - not sure if she made it out, but if she did she'll certainly be shit-faced. Literally.

We hunt down her remaining crew without much trouble - until we reach her engineer Hyperius the Invincible. This heavily shielded guy comes with equally shielded loaders that need to be taken care of first. Luckily my buzz axe rampage is really good at making meatbicycles out of robots now, and despite the long fight we finally chop him up in the end! CHOP SUEY!

Gotta shoot those nuts before a third wind!

The last on the hit list is Master Gee, who truly is invincible - though there must be a secret with all the acidic worms that spawn in his arena. Having lost too much cash from "reconstruction" we decide to leave him for now and to train at the Badass Crater of Badassitude arena run by the delightful Mr. Torque. His favourite word is F*CK!

Instead of pirates, the bandits in this region are all Mad Max biker themed - complete with motorbikes and sidecars. Our first arena fight against waves of bikeys is really easy and it instantly brings us to #5 on the rankings - but to continue the climb, we need to first find a sponsor.

Insight: Undead Pirates who show up with normal mobs are far more dangerous than the Leviathan. These skeletal swashbucklers hit hard and are fricking tough due to their regenerating health. When you see one, burst it down ASAP.

---

Blaugust Bonus: "What is something you have lost along the way that you would love to have back?  Can be serious or frivolous." -SDWeasel

Anonymity. Good luck getting that back. :P

Borderlands 2: Get that Booty!

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

Concerned about future attacks, Firehawk asks our team to go gather funds to strengthen Sanctuary - and what better funds to look for than some lost treasure?! PIRATE TREASURE! ARRRRRRH!

The three of us head to the town of Oasis to begin the search where Jim finds an amazing Fastball grenade mod that features a tiny explosion but can be thrown far and insta-kills most regular enemies. Once DL repairs a nearby hovercraft it becomes really easy to murderize all the sand worms and pirate themed enemies in our way.

It's not long before another pirate - Captain Scarlett, invites us to her ship for a parley. She too is looking for the lost treasure, and is willing to split it with us if we help her find it. Since she's kinda hot despite missing more than a few body pieces, we say "Aye!"

She's the only one other than Moxxi who has "shrines" dedicated to her.

We need to assemble a lens that will reveal where the treasure is buried and she saves us time by simply giving us the first piece. We get the next two easily from the Pirate Union (flying their own hovercrafts) and a Hyperion convoy guarded by loader bots - easy prey for ramming. The next one is given to us by some old coot at the rustyards, but since it's in a locked chest - DL shoots it open and damages the part! LOL WHUUUUT? Thus begins a long trek to a refinery full of pirate-bots (obviously) to repair it.

Finally, with the lens complete - we head up to a really high lighthouse as per Captain Scarlett's instructions and use it to show to the world where the great treasure is buried. It's at this point she sends her crew to kill us while she herself races to the loot. Why Scarlett? WHYYYY! I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENNNDS....

Insight: Unlike the previous vehicles the hovercraft is a freaking tank which more than makes up for the weaker arsenal they can carry. To this end, it's faster to ram everything to death (where possible) instead of shooting them.

---

Blaugust Bonus: "Tell us about your physical creative space, and how it influences your content creation." -Krikket

My desk is full of loose papers which act as the diary for various games I play. Each side is titled and numbered so I know what they link to and having them in front of me encourages me to continue the notations.

Borderlands 2: The Stuff of Movies

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

With our fresh supplies of teeth, eyes and bombs we head on to the Hyperion Info Stockade which is like a giant library in the shape of an iridium refinery and guarded by a HUGE robot called Saturn! I think they named a planet after this thing! Good thing it's slow so Jim dual lazers it to death. DUAL LAZERZ!

That robot is taller than this house!

Using our supplies we find Jack's location and head there with a full assault team led by Slabby and Mordecai to counter all his Hyperion defences. Jack himself uses the Vault Key to summon "the Warrior", a giant flame humanoid stolen right out of Nausicaa. What? I watch Anime!

Much like it's anime counterpart, this Warrior is flawed and has a weakness we greatly exploit: bullets, lazers and rotary-axes into the heart! It dies without too much fuss and before Jack can beg for mercy DL puts a bullet in his head and saves Firehawk. We're totally badass heroes now! YEAH!

I wonder if they'll ever make a movie about us, one that Hollywood won't screw up... oh shiiieeeet. Too late!

Insight: Empty your pack before the final fight because the warrior is one big loot pinata!

---

Blaugust Bonus: "What's your process when creating a blog post?" -Paeroka

If I find a game I can write a story about, I keep a diary of loose papers on what I do in it and then much later condense all of that into blog posts. If it's more leaning towards a simple review, I try type that down within a week of playing/experiencing the media so it's still fresh in my head.

Once a post is ready in my digital text document (yep I use notepad), the corresponding papers get shuffled away into a drawer. Only after all the posts of that game are actually posted online do I then toss the relevant papers out for recycling.

Borderlands 2: Just Take It

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

While the leaders of Sanctuary plan a counter attack, we three amigos first go to distant Lynchwood in search of a "cursed gun", which Jim finds is really cursed since it prevents movement while drawn. Lynchwood is home to the bunny bandit army though, with respawning bad guys regularly -pooping- popping out from every shack. They are definitely allied with Hyperion too so we blow up their train and railroad, rob their bank and kill their female sheriff!

Turns out she was Handsome Jack's girlfriend so he's not very happy that I put a rocket in her mouth. He's even less happy when we go to the site of his nearly complete utopian city "Opportunity" and wreck the place for fun - destroying his statues, flooding build sites, exploding construction equipment and oh yeah... murder all his laborer bots and engineers!

The size of said rocket.

Since we're already in the process of destroying his hopes and dreams we then join the Sanctuary army to take the fight to their main base and assisted by Slab buzzard air support, battle through the soldiers, destroy their flying bunker and kill his evil suicidal bitch siren daughter! Just as we are about to take the artifact like taking a baby from their candy, Roland and Firehawk show up and make a mess of things, getting killed and abducted in that order. Uh, I mean, respectively! Yeah.

So Jack gets away with everything and we are left with nothing. While Slabby and Mordecai the birdless plan the next move, we kill some time hunting a giant skag, fighting in Moxxi's Ore Chasmic arena (against Hyperion), and nearly falling for Jack's traps by going to check on his grandma as well as nearly jumping off a cliff for money. He's a sly one this Jack fella. Good thing DL and Jim managed to hold me back!

Finally Slabby gives us a mission to get some supplies (and by supplies I mean bombs) from another gang called the Sawtooth. Shouldn't it be Sawteeth? Well it doesn't matter. They don't have teeth or eyes or bombs anymore. We took em. We took em ALLLLLL!

Insight: The most upstairs part of the flying bunker fight (just before the water) is a good spot to fight as the structure there provides a lot of cover.

---

Blaugust Bonus: "Tell us about some of your favorite protagonist(s) and explain why. Or talk about characters in which you can recognize yourself or parts of yourself." -Endalia

John Constantine, because he gets things done often via the hard choice even at the expense of his friends. Not seen so much with the Keanu Reeves movie version but every iteration voiced or played by Matt Ryan does this. Also, Batman because even if he keeps people alive, most of his allies end up disliking/hating him since "the mission" comes first. I don't have their gear nor talent, but if it comes down to sacrificing popularity or people for my own goals - you bet!

Borderlands 2: Flipping the Bird

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

While exploring, we stumble upon Fink's Slaughterhouse which serves as an arena for the locals. Naturally we participate and thanks to the shiney gear DL has pulled and shared out using his golden keys (it gives super gear), smash through the first four rounds with only little difficulty. It's fun to make midgets bleeeed!

The fifth round is quite bad though with Jim and I both getting KO'ed but DL still manages to pull the win with his turret! Afterwards we head on to the Hyperion Wildlife Preservation Park to help Mordecai find his bird, which Hyperion had stolen from him recently. The park is like a zoo, only with monsters that are undergoing mutation testing - FOR SCIENCE!

With Mordecai providing flaccid sniper cover, we break in. Free the souls of the captive beasts and find his bird, which is now enlarged and evil! Despite our best efforts to save it by shooting it with bullets, Mordecai's bird explodes at the climax. He is left bitter and birdless.

In retaliation for this, we go back through the Wildlife Preservation Park to free all the trapped animals. It's a nice to have skags and stalkers on our side for a change! We also find a super helpful guy running an arena biome with said creatures.

He lets us free five rounds worth of the animals and even pays us to boot! The badass fire thresher in the last round manages to KO Jim, but he is freed too - just like his friends. Freed from all their suffering, freed to the great beyond! MUAHAHAHAHAHAH! *buzz saw sounds*

Roland then radios in and gets us to travel to the Thousand Cuts region to try make an alliance with the local bandits, "the Slabs", to unite against Hyperion. We diplomatically kill anyone who refuses to join. Eventually the Slab King, frenemy of Roland whom I shall dub "Slabby", officially agrees when the nearby "main" Hyperion base launches a full scale attack, sending the Slabs retreating to Sanctuary.

Yeah, nahhh... your name's Slabby mate.

Insight: Clusters of enemies are the best targets for a psychos buzz axe rampage. Each kill restores your health to full. Just remember to take cover again afterwards.

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Blaugust Bonus: "If you had a mascot to represent you, what would it be?" -Rambling Redshirt

It's a shadow that you can only occasionally glimpse for a split second from the corner of your vision and also whispers things to your mind. Perhaps you've already encountered it before?

Borderlands 2: Overlooked Help

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

Only after dismantling another Hyperion facility and killing a Shai'hulud Thresher do we finally reach the Highlands that Sanctuary is floating over. Can't just warp to it though, no sir. For that we head to the village of Overlook to get the warp machine programmed properly, all while Hyperion sends more bots.

I get to really show off here, as all the enemies are clustering towards a fixed point we are meant to defend. DL and Jim get overwhelmed a lot, but rampaging through the enemy (in melee) keeps me aliiiiive! Hahaha I will kill your death! As expected the programming finishes after all the fighting, and we are free to teleport back to Sanctuary for a heroes welcome! Or... not. Actually I doubt most of these meat sacks realize the city is now airborne.

While the Crimson leadership continues to plan the next move, we're kept busy by a sudden influx of new jobs at the now flying Sanctuary, the highlights of which include finding a murderer in which we accuse the wrong suspect - letting the culprit get away, inviting people to Claptraps birthday party which no one attends, helping Ellie put an end to a gang war which we helped start, and retrieving a safe for Marcus from some big blue elemental which we abandon since it is immortal thanks to a bug.

The killer is one of those four guys...

We then return to the town of Overlook with Dr. Ned's meds to help them cure their brain disease then proceed to assemble a town encompassing shield to protect against further Hyperion attacks. Naturally this shield needs to be tested, so we raid the nearby Hyperion outpost and after breaking all the guardian mechs use their super mortar and fire it right at the town.

It goes as well as you might expect!

Insight: The only way to "fix" the blue monster was to leave the area and come back. We got him on our second visit.

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Blaugust Bonus: "What skill do you want to improve on the most?" -Stingite

Currently, anything music related. Finding time to do that is really hard though... Maybe I should change that to focus on time management skill instead? :P