Justice League Dark: Apokolips War

Definitely earns the "Dark" part in the title.

The basic story of this animated movie is that Apokolips is attacking Earth (again) but this time he means business! Though still centered on John Constantine (voiced by Matt Ryan) this one features the a lot more of the Justice League and then some, unlike the last outing. The animation is above average quality and the story is pretty damn good as well.

"Get to work, demon!"

There is also loads of gore and violence, so if you don't want to see your favorite superhero characters get mutilated, dismembered, degraded and killed then you might want to skip this. For me, it makes it ALL THE MORE AWESOME! I give it 4 paradooms out of 5 and would definitely watch it again! Highly recommended.

Borderlands 2: Just Take It

[Part of the Wasted Land story]

While the leaders of Sanctuary plan a counter attack, we three amigos first go to distant Lynchwood in search of a "cursed gun", which Jim finds is really cursed since it prevents movement while drawn. Lynchwood is home to the bunny bandit army though, with respawning bad guys regularly -pooping- popping out from every shack. They are definitely allied with Hyperion too so we blow up their train and railroad, rob their bank and kill their female sheriff!

Turns out she was Handsome Jack's girlfriend so he's not very happy that I put a rocket in her mouth. He's even less happy when we go to the site of his nearly complete utopian city "Opportunity" and wreck the place for fun - destroying his statues, flooding build sites, exploding construction equipment and oh yeah... murder all his laborer bots and engineers!

The size of said rocket.

Since we're already in the process of destroying his hopes and dreams we then join the Sanctuary army to take the fight to their main base and assisted by Slab buzzard air support, battle through the soldiers, destroy their flying bunker and kill his evil suicidal bitch siren daughter! Just as we are about to take the artifact like taking a baby from their candy, Roland and Firehawk show up and make a mess of things, getting killed and abducted in that order. Uh, I mean, respectively! Yeah.

So Jack gets away with everything and we are left with nothing. While Slabby and Mordecai the birdless plan the next move, we kill some time hunting a giant skag, fighting in Moxxi's Ore Chasmic arena (against Hyperion), and nearly falling for Jack's traps by going to check on his grandma as well as nearly jumping off a cliff for money. He's a sly one this Jack fella. Good thing DL and Jim managed to hold me back!

Finally Slabby gives us a mission to get some supplies (and by supplies I mean bombs) from another gang called the Sawtooth. Shouldn't it be Sawteeth? Well it doesn't matter. They don't have teeth or eyes or bombs anymore. We took em. We took em ALLLLLL!

Insight: The most upstairs part of the flying bunker fight (just before the water) is a good spot to fight as the structure there provides a lot of cover.

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Blaugust Bonus: "Tell us about some of your favorite protagonist(s) and explain why. Or talk about characters in which you can recognize yourself or parts of yourself." -Endalia

John Constantine, because he gets things done often via the hard choice even at the expense of his friends. Not seen so much with the Keanu Reeves movie version but every iteration voiced or played by Matt Ryan does this. Also, Batman because even if he keeps people alive, most of his allies end up disliking/hating him since "the mission" comes first. I don't have their gear nor talent, but if it comes down to sacrificing popularity or people for my own goals - you bet!

The Cursed: Gambling with Many Things

[Part of the Cursed story line]

Near the portal down, which the party cannot activate, is a demon and his lackeys. Fortunately this demon knows Haer'Dalis and wants to gamble with the team with his deck of many things.

What? Demons love to gamble!

Catharina agrees to the game, winning the first two rounds and getting a nice sword and a scroll of "Wish" while only suffering minor curses but on the third round the demon wins, having bargained with the holy icon that grants freedom from the keep.

Catharina honors the deal and the demon and entourage leave. Thankfully he throws the icon back after stepping through his portal, giving the party the chance to escape - if they can find the way out of the damned maze.

Unfortunately she's not smart enough to just Wish them out.

Insight: The Wish spell here is more combat oriented, which seems to be a really bad time to summon a djinn and carefully word something.

Constantine: City of Demons

When one demon isn't enough.

Having the same animation quality as Justice League: Dark, this tale follows John Constantine (voiced by Matt Ryan, who also portrays him in live action) as he tries to save a child's life, and more importantly sheds some light on why he is so haunted by the events at "Newcastle".

More adult than you might think.

As you might expect, there are demons, magic and action sequences throughout but this thoroughly goes for an R rating as it also includes a lot of blood, gore and even sex into the mix and is better for it. Well, at least the blood and gore.

Probably not one for the kids but a definite lock for fans of Constantine. I give it 2.5 dirty bathroom lessons out of 5 and would watch it again.

Old TV Reviews: Constantine's Redemption

A continuation of my old TV show reviews.

The Blacklist: Redemption (Cancelled)

I quite like the Blacklist, even more so these days since a particular character is less irksome than previously. Unfortunately this spin off stuck too close to the original formula to be engaging which is a shame. Especially since what makes the original formula work is James Spader. Not much of a loss for me, and not one I'd recommend unless you are a completionist. Watch the original Blacklist though (which is still going), that one is good fun.

Doesn't match up to the original.

Constantine (Cancelled)

Matt Ryan makes a fantastic Constantine (no offense to Keanu's movie version) and is very watchable in his 13 episode series which follows a monster of the week format. Just as the main threat begins to appear the series got cancelled, possibly due to lack of marketing. Luckily the character and the actor have since been imported to Arrow for one episode and now has a recurring role in Legends of Tomorrow.

Resurrected from development hell!

Constantine (Game)

The Keanu Reeves Constantine, not Matt Ryan's Constantine.

Continuing the games based on movies trend, Constantine suffers from many flaws. A questionable "filler" plot filled with holes and time skips, wooden voice acting, and low quality graphics with Constantine's running motion being quite unnatural. My biggest gripe is everything being dark. So dark you will be always be using the "True Sight" spell which puts you in first person mode and turns all the colors into an odd shades of oranges and blues.

Armed with relics (cough firearms cough) as you fight through demons both on Earth and in hell, the game is ultimately a series of fetch quests. It does have some saving grace though - the puzzles and ideas are quite neat, as is the quasi QTE spell casting system. Time slows down while casting but doesn't stop, meaning enemies can still hit you and disrupt your spell. The "strange at first" battle music also gets my thumbs up.

For all the demons, people with guns are still the most dangerous.

I ended up enjoying this game because of the theme and ideas, and give it 2 water puddles out of five. Not sure I can recommend it to others though.

Justice League Dark

Aka "Batman meets Constantine".

When people start having waking nightmares and killing each other, the Justice League springs into action to try stop the madness. And by that I mean, Batman alone decides to investigate. I suppose the rest *could* be trying to keep the peace but we don't really see that. It is totally understandable though to make room for the more mystical powered heroes he teams up with, the most notable being Zatanna and Constantine.

Facial expressions: Determined, Determined, Determined, and Batman.

There's a bit of slowness during the introduction of these newbies, but the fun gradually picks up pace as the team faces more absurd characters and challenges such as: demons, ghosts, wizards, shit monsters... etc. Even Batman isn't impressed (which is hilarious). While the story is definitely out there, it works towards a very satisfactory ending.

Not a bad outing for this Justice League movie. Not fantastic, but not bad. I'd definitely watch it again and hope they make more of this "Dark" series. All up I give it three magic spells out of five. If you like Justice League and/or the Constantine TV show, you'll probably like this.