Pathfinder: The ones at Storval

[Part of the Party Time journal]

Upon approaching the massive and guarded steps leading up to the Storval Plateau, Valeros plays the prisoner gambit (in this case Razmus pretending to be a prisoner) with long planned forged letters ready to go. Alas, Kyra's diplomacy roll of a natural one means the six giant guards immediately start throwing and rolling boulders down the giant steps like Donkey Kong! 

Ezran and Kyra fireball nuke the attentive guards, while a hasted Razmus (who can run up the giant steps as normal) gets right up to their face quickly and smacks down the weakened ones easily. With them dead, the team continue up and rest up near the mountains before attempting a stealth raid on the looming watch tower up ahead, which stands pretty far from the main castle and is used as an early warning system. Merisiel's stealth roll of a natural one means the warning signal is lit even before the squad reaches there.

They can annihilate the giant guards-woman and her two runeslaves pretty quickly then hide in the watch tower itself as a giant roc comes to investigate. They hope to ambush the bird when it lands but no - it instead hovers above squaking loudly for some time.  Luckily, it flies off before any investigators from the freaking army camped outside the giant castle approach (they're still forming ranks) so Razmus leads the team through the mountains he previously used to escape from while Ezren drops a wall of force to slow any pursuers.

Eventually they reach a long drop to a ravine below where they use collectively use their siege or regular engineering knowledge to construct a ladder-stair down to the narrow shore edge, but thanks to DL rolling super high on the percentile die a patrol of three stone giants and their giant dire bears show up at an awkward time and have to be put down and tossed in the drink before the team makes their descent.

Pathfinder: The Shoanti Squad

[Part of the Party Time journal]

From Ravenmoor the party continue North, crossing a deep chasm on a flimsy rope bridge guarded by four trolls and some annoying stirges. The fire weak trolls aren't burned due to the condition of the crossing so are instead downed and tossed in the ravine where they'll regenerate after... however many months or years. :P 

The team then meet five Shoanti tribesmen who are questing to rescue some captives of their own, and Valeros readily agrees to help them. They assemble outside a troll berserker camp which is easily torched by Ezren while Kyra's celestial elephant crushes most of the defenders underfoot. Merisiel frees the caged captives here, none of whom are from towns the party has been in, but at least the people the Shoanti wanted to save are here - including a Shoanti princess. Peach is that you?

In thanks the Shoanti escort the squad back to their village, which so happens to be under attack by a chimera who is slain in two quick turns. Meeting with the chieftain later, the party learns that the Shoanti and giants used to be more friendly to each other, they even used to trade goods. Now the chieftain shares a vision of a possible entry to the giant castle involving a dark cave with webs, and sends the five strong Shoanti squad with them to assist.

While they leave their mounts at the Shoanti village as the chief suggests, their party number still increases when they finally regroup with their old buddy Razmus the hill giant whom they magically "called" (seriously its almost like a telephone spell) some time ago (just after the raid on Sandpoint) as his knowledge of his old ex-buddies might come in handy. 

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire and X (2022)

Having an "X" in the title makes it cool.

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire

This sequel kaiju flick finds Kong being lonely while Godzilla is busy roaming the world murderizing the other titans as he feels like. Plot wise this is definitely more Kong focused and its funny that even though the status quo is that giant monsters are sort of common now  there are still many scenes and plot twists that stretch belief. You'll see. That said the CGI and action bits are pretty good and the lack of talking for at least 50% of the movie actually helps it out. Interestingly most death happens off screen, to make it kid friendlier? Overall a fun movie with no depth, despite how far hollow earth goes. :P

X (2022)

In this horror slasher a small crew decides to make a porno flick and pick the wrong place to stay and shoot footage because of an elderly couple who happen to be murderous old horn dogs. This low budget and super self aware flick has all the usual tropes including a variation on the hilarious "let's split up" one, just with more excuses to show more skin. Acting wise Mia Goth does good work in her double role, but its hard to feel afraid of bad guys who mainly get away by appearing harmless. Ultimately the movie doesn't excel in any part it does, which is a bit of a shame. 

Gladiator 2 and Ballerina

Action movies where people make poor choices.

Gladiator 2

This sequel depicts a Rome still in the grip of corruption, this time with a pair of twin Emperors holding bloody games in the arena. Paul Mescal portrays the enslaved protagonist this time around, and the acting and combat is pretty decent. The story goes really well too, until the last third or so where it feels the writers were suddenly told that the run time is too long, and that characters need to make stupid decisions to simplify and shorten it. Such a shame because it was suddenly on track to being better than the original but... nope. That is not the case here. 

From the World of John Wick: Ballerina

Ana de Armas plays the main protagonist in this action flick driven by vengeance for her murdered -dog- father. No, she isn't as physical nor as convincing in combat as John Wick (Keanu Reeves) - but at least they address that story wise. While its definitely her story I'm surprised at the amount of John Wick in it as well, which is a great bonus! While the plot is mainly predictable, it's disappointing that the plot armor is thick and combat decisions are at times incredibly stupid all in the effort to get a "cool visual". Only recommended for true John Wick fans, or action fans who don't really care about plot.

What Happened to Monday and Death of a Unicorn

Two not too well known movies?

What Happened to Monday

This sci-fi flick is set in a dystopian future where due to food shortages families are only allowed one child. One dad isn't standing for it though and decides to keep all his seven children, named after days of the week, whom he trains to be one "person". Of course, one day something goes wrong!

Noomi Rapace has the challenging role of playing all seven sisters and does very well with it, and there are many cool bits with a surprising amount of action segments. Despite some hilariously massive plot holes (which are easily spotted but the script writers said, "meh, just go with it") it actually is a pretty entertaining film. It's very cool while also being very far from perfect. 

Death of a Unicorn

This horror comedy has some popular actors led by Paul Rudd and Jenna Ortega who respectively play a widowed lawyer, too busy for his daughter and said daughter who is often ignored by her dad. After a car accident involving a unicorn, hilarity ensues as greedy humans try their best to survive against the vengeful beasts. While the story is predictable (complete with plot hole predictability) its still entertaining to watch people get their comeuppance. Not a bad movie, but not a great movie either.

Alien: Earth and A Quiet Place: Day One

Humans are being stupid again...

Alien: Earth

This currently one season horror starts with a spaceship crashing into a city and said spaceship is a scientific research vessel that's been collecting "specimens". Not really a spoiler: face huggers and xenomorphs ahoy. The costume and set design are the true winners here as they really bring to life the retro future of the alien franchise.

Paired with this however is the story of new, hybrid synths which are your regular white blooded AI body but instead of having a (usually murderous and psychotic) AI mind, a human consciousness is placed within instead - offering a type of immortality. Since only kid minds are compatible there's a lot of Peter Pan references and... yeah. They're mostly stupid too. 

It's an interesting show at least so we'll definitely watch a season two when/if it comes out, but the horror aspect is lost towards the end of this season and I strangely felt the death count is still too low. Maybe I just got spoiled by the movies.

A Quiet Place: Day One

This prequel to the other Quiet Place movies follows a terminally ill cancer hospice resident named Sam (played by Lupita Nyong'o) and her scene stealing cat Frodo, on their quest to get... pizza? Yes, that sounds silly but this movie makes it work. The many alien monsters show up pretty early in the piece, still do most of their kills off screen and aren't afraid of the light (good CGI). As they purely go off sounds its generally easy to get around them... except people are stupid because the plot requires action moments. Outside of those questionable decisions, the film is quite enjoyable. The cat is the true hero. :P

Fantastic Four: First Steps and Thunderbolts*

A pair of Marvel movies.

Fantastic Four: First Steps

In a world where the future feels very much like the Jetsons, established super heroes and planetary defenders the Fantastic Four (this time led by Pedro Pascal as Reed Richards) face a pair of unexpected events: the impeding arrival of world eater Galactus, and having a baby. Alas, the script makes it that not all Four get an equal amount of importance - this mission could have been done with just three.

The bad part of being established heroes means there are lots of public speaking / speaking to the crowd parts but good CGI and some nice action pieces keep the story moving. While there are similarities to the Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007) there are enough differences to make it unique. Alas overall, its still a pretty average movie. 

Thunderbolts*

When a group of individual black ops operatives from various sources (with a focus on Florence Pugh's Black Widow) are sent into a trap, they end up forming a team that reluctantly saves the day. Outside the decent plot, humor and action pieces the movie explores depression which is different for a superhero flick. Despite that the acting, story and overall tone are still vastly more enjoyable than Fantastic Four: First steps above. Thumbs up!