Showing posts with label Jean Claude Van Damme. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jean Claude Van Damme. Show all posts

Monday, 19 October 2015

Pound of Flesh

Steal from Van Damme and lets see what happens.

While in the Philippines (which in many shots looks a lot like China), Van Damme uses the wrong head and wakes up to find he has been robbed... of an organ! Naturally this leads him on a quest of vengeance to retrieve what was taken from him. While JCVD is still in good form with flexibility he is definitely not as fast as he used to be but it still makes for an entertaining enough watch to see him beat down the bad guys while supposedly in a "weakened" condition.

Yeah, anyone can do that after major surgery.

Story wise it's ok enough but there are a few characters that could have been excluded or minimized in the telling, Van Damme's American brother being my number one culprit. I also don't agree with their final decision (which basically lets the bad guy win) in the movie making it an even weaker outing than it was already. All up I give it one and a half roofies out of five and only can recommend this to Van Damme fans. Would I watch it a second time? No.

Friday, 25 September 2015

Double Dragon: Kiss of the Dragon and Dragon Eyes

Kiss of the Dragon

It pays to run a background check on someone before you frame them for something.

Liu (Jet Li) is an undercover cop sent to Paris to assist the police there with some undercover sting operation. Things quickly go South when he is framed by the corrupt cops and spends the rest of the movie a wanted man in a foreign land. I quite like the story in this one as it is one of those rare action flicks where there is no traditional love story to get in the way. Jet Li is in good fighting form here and all parties involved are on the higher than average acting scale for me. This movie also holds one of my favourite fight scenes of all time, which is Jet Li vs "the twins", one of whom is played by Cyril Raffaelli.

Cyril vs Jet

No it's not a flawless movie by any means. Liu's ninja mastery is a little too good to be believed, being able to suddenly escape from what I would think are "challenging" locations, his funky use of acupuncture needles, and his magical shield which somehow protects him from bullets. You also have to question the final part where he simply decides to go on an all out attack. Probably could have done that a lot sooner dude! Still it's a decent action flick and one I give three spinning kicks out of five. Definitely would like to watch it again!

~~~

Dragon Eyes

The best way to make friends is to beat them up.

Hong (Cung Le) is an excon trying to clean up the town of St. Jude from all the gangs, by beating them into submission. That's the whole "meat" of the story right there, and while Peter Weller makes for a good "bad guy", Cung is not charismatic enough to carry the film, nor is his fighting style "pretty" to watch. It's mostly just beat downs with no form which while probably being more realistic, is not as entertaining. The pointless opening credits with a car filler sequence should have been a hint.

Can you check if I stepped on some gum?

But, Van Damme is there right? Yes, in what seems to be an extended flashback cameo where he mentors Cung Le on how to fight. Doesn't look like you taught him how to do the split kick, Jean Claude. The editing is slightly wonky here too, which I think is intentional to disguise that there's not actually much going on.

Unfortunately what little story there is also makes no sense as gangs quickly concede leadership to Hong, who apparently is a skilled burglar though we never see him actually burgle anything, and almost everyone either forgets to use guns, or capitulated with Hong's "leadership decision" to stop using them. Eh?

After finishing with an abrupt end I could only feel pity, as this probably could have been something much better than what it turned out to be. Unless you are a martial arts buff that likes Cung Le then you'd best be skipping this movie. I can only give it one sparring session out of five and do not want to see it again.

Monday, 6 January 2014

Today I Smiled: The Epic Splits

I'm probably late on this one, but for those who haven't yet seen the very impressive Volvo ad with Jean Claude Van Damme you should take a look. It's been so successful that there have been a variety of people copying him either dangerously or comically. One of the best comic ones is this one, and I hope it brings a smile to your face as it did to mine. :)