Pathfinder: Thistlebottom

[Part of the Party Time journal] 

Close to where the pantsless bugbear was slain we find the mercenary Orik barricaded in his room who convinces us he wants out of the bad guy's team. Kyra (Rose) convinces him to work for us instead and he takes point while slaying a giant octopus and on the next level down is the one who kicks in the door to his ex-boss' room after Merisiel (mom) disarms a hallway trap in the way.

His ex-boss is super angry at this and nearly kills him and King Fat Mouth while her pet dog, which flies and is as terrifying as the ones in the chapel, hops over the defensive line and mauls Ezren (Juris) almost to death! Lucky the mage can land some tazer prods (wand of shocking grasp) to weaken the creature before Valeros (me) slays it. A ridiculous critical from Shay (GM DL) unexpectedly slays the boss lady and the party rests before delving deeper to the section not even she and her minions reached.

Opening a massive evil door the party is greeted by... empty space? Merisiel precieves something huge cloaked in the air so Ezren sends a flaming sphere up there to explode it, and it hits - revealing a barghest that these Lamashtu cultists were trying to free! It mauls Shay and Orik severely but in turn gets caned by magics from Fat Mouth,  Kyra and Ezren (who blinds it), while Valeros, Shay and Merisiel (flanking back stab bonus) hack away at it (Orik's non-magic sword can only nick it).  Ultimately it is Kyra's summoned celestial eagle that slays the fiend with its beak and talons that can smite evil!

After defeating such a horrendous foe, clearing out the remaining rooms of a trio of shadows and a gigantic crab is something of an after thought with the party's soaring morale. With that, the dungeon is clear and the quest is complete! King Fat Mouth is allowed to take whatever he can carry and get out of there (no doubt to Shay's protests) while the rest of the party returns to Sandpoint victorious!

Gloomhaven: Treasure and the Trials of the Terrible Turd Tunnels

[Part of the Party Time journal] 

With the path now clear to find the poison in the lower levels Juris makes the call to... sail away from Gloomhaven and search for treasure! Haha, well adventuring needs funds you know? As a bonus there are also no "road encounters" for ocean centered missions! Thus we take a ship to some nearby islands to the East, first landing on a small vermling infested one which immediately proves too scary as they have pet bears so we run and sail a little further south where a treasure map DL purchased leads us to a reefed vessel which is now home to ugly crab things and lumbering frost demons.

Said crabs and demons are actually easy foes to handle, to the point where I'm almost a room ahead of the others and opening doors to let more monsters get involved with the fray. Of course, I almost overextend TOO much and finish the adventure exactly just before I exhaust out but not before we enact Jim's plan of leaving the last enemy alive to loot as much as we could which lets us leave with a fair bit of coin. Yep, any gold or treasure you don't pick up mid-combat / before the mission is over is just abandoned! It's one of the odd systems in Gloomhaven I'm not too happy with since obviously you should be able to loot after clearing out a spot but whatever. We return to the city richer and wonder why everyone is getting even more sick. Oh right! The poison...

We paddle through the muck into the ancient cistern and find while Juris slays many night demons in the depths, DL has terrible luck with his attacks. The source of the poison, four contaminated water pipes, each spawn an extra imp per round and DL is the first to fall while I scurry and shut off the rear two valves before following suit. Juris shuts another down before he too drops leaving Jim to cleanse the final one - which he does! But then... all the imps get their turn and knock him back forcing us to retreat. Despite completing the objective, I guess the win condition is only checked at the end of a round. Mission fail!

The Killer Security

Two movies with killing.

The Killer

Michael Fassbender stars as the titular character, a killer whose outward silence is compensated by almost continuous monologing to himself and/or the audience. You know how I like making fun of movies that waste lots of time showing people going from one place to another with Attack Force taking the cake? This movie does that in spades and is so freaking slow that I almost wish I was watching Attack Force instead! Whoever edited this is the real killer, as they kill the audience with boredom. Had they cut out most of the inane traveling scenes and skipped "chapter 1" altogether then they might have had an ok movie. As it is, this is garbage. Not recommended.

Security

A down on his luck veteran (played by Antonio Banderas) manages to finally get a job as a shopping mall security guard and on his first night must defend the place against a siege from heavily armed gangsters. Does that sound implausible? It only gets wilder from here, and the plot really has this tonal clashing going on between being kid friendly and Die Hard violent. Lucky for me it scales more towards the later and violent deaths abound which is GREAT. While the story is only ankle deep the action certainly makes this one interesting for almost all of its running time. Does that make this a good movie? Nope - its just ok especially due to the shenanigans towards the end but it certainly is miles better than The Killer!

Doom Patrol

Characters destined to lose?

Focusing on a DC superhero group that is anything but, this four season show starts of insanely strong with characters so deeply flawed its almost like everything they do is growth. Unfortunately everything goes wrong at season three mark where, despite still having a few moments of awesomeness, the  script really just circles that shitter with characters stringing out expletives just to be edgy, fill time, and/or try "cover" poor writing every few sentences to the point that my wife gave up on it. It also seems to suffer a similar problem which Titans did in that characters reverse their growth/progress each season which is annoying. Usually I'd say check out the first few seasons then drop out when it gets bad but in this case, maybe just avoid it altogether.

Golden Light and Turnip Boy commits Tax Evasion

Two crazy games.

Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion

The title turns out to be the quest hook for Turnip Boy to go on a quest around Veggieville while dodging horrible vegetarians (horribly cute) snails, rabbits and the like. I ended up liking this one way more than I thought I would as the tone is so light and the required skill level is absolutely minimal while still having a pretty decent story. I only had to learn how to dodge towards the end! Anyway, there's also "after game" content in the form of a train "arena" if you really liked the combat offered here. I'm pleasantly surprised that I'm recommending this, as it is a fun and super light game.

Golden Light

The total opposite of the above, this first person game features possibly intentional bad graphics and the most mental setup I've played for awhile. I mean, its the only game I've played where there's a key bind to HIT YOURSELF, as well as one where you can eat your own weapons. Mmmm, that was a tasty axe!?! It feels like the objective is to SUFFER collect keys to get the elevators down down down and down while avoiding the monsters lurking around who have so far all been of the mimic variety. Levels are cluttered with garbage and some of that garbage will move around on its own - possibly transforming into something more hideous to try eat you. Definitely an unsettling game, and not one for me.

ZOM 100: Bucket List of the Dead (Season 1 and Movie)

Somehow both got released close to each other!

Anime (Season 1)

A zombie apocalypse is exactly what Akira needs to break free from his exploitative corporate job and is inspired to list and do "100 Things before I become a zombie" which range from the mundane to the absurd, which fits perfectly into this comedy. Any horror here is dialed right down with the zombies being covered not in red blood but a rainbow array of yet unexplained goo. It's a funny and uplifting nine episode series with pretty good animation and voice acting (note: I listened to the English VA for both). Nine episodes as of now that is. If it was popular enough to get a live action movie straight away I'm certain there will be at least a season two as well. Recommended if you want something silly.

Live-Action Movie

While the setup is almost identical the movie condenses themes and beats from the nine anime episodes into a two hour flick, with more horror than the anime as they got some decent makeup (no longer in rainbow colors) and flexible actors to be the zombies who now have a slightly different trait. For the most part the story condensing is quite well done actually, though it does get a bit rough in the last section timing wise. Despite that I think it actually could have been condensed a bit more with some unnecessary long sequences and speeches. Worth noting the English VAs in the anime did a better job and the acting here is subpar at times. That said, if you haven't seen the anime then this will probably be fine so long as you're expecting a silly and just occasionally funny movie.

The Ice Road and All the Light We Cannot See

Two conditions you probably shouldn't be driving in? :P

The Ice Road

When an accident gets some people trapped in a mine, it is up to down to a few truckies including one played by Liam Neeson to sign up for a dangerous drive against time across a frozen lake while hauling a heavy load of equipment to save the trapped men before their air runs out. Since the writers figured that was too boring, they also decided to make it an action movie which results in some very poor brawling sequences, poor effects, and a questionable plot that is teeming with inconsistencies. It's not very good but it might still appeal for people that like watching big rigs doing things they shouldn't normally be doing.

All the Light We Cannot See

This four episode mini-series follows a blind French girl and a German soldier who have a shared passion for radios during World War II. While there are good sets, acting, effects and an interesting enough story, there's a heavy use of flashbacks (*bum-bummmm noise*) and in some parts you can actually feel the plot armor on some characters. Had this been told chronologically I think I would have liked it better. I mean, all the bits are filmed anyway for the audience but how they are revealed is mostly when someone asks a character about their past. Instead of having a plot that spans however many years, the entire story (the part that matters where all the "stakes" are) just takes place in a few days.

Only in occasions where someone is discovering the past through unrelated characters should flashbacks be considered, like in The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar. Anyway, that's just my little nitpick. It's still enjoyable as it is.